What are some good chores for a 4 year old?

Could she do the dishes with you? It could be a chore and a bonding experience with you. :)

Making her bed is good…helping to set the table, emptying the trash, dusting…..

No matter what you choose, at that age they love teamwork, and what a wonderful way to learn it… my son enjoyed folding laundry, feeding the dogs, straightening up bookshelves, and carrying stuff to and fro when running errands at that age.

Do you have pets? Have her feed the dog (or cat). It might be a little hard for her to make her bed yet depending on how big it is compared to her.

When my daughter was four, she helped set the table, helped empty the dishwasher, helped fold clothes (face cloths, dish towels), and helped dry-mop the floors.

Of course, you have to make it fun. We also always pitch chores as something we do together – “we’re a team”, “we take care of our house together”. She seems to like the camaraderie.

She loves to help clean. Any time the vacuum comes out, she gets her play one and goes along with us. She also uses the Shark sweeper we have to clean up little messes – and she’s pretty good at it!

She does help put the dishes away, fold the clothes (I have to refold them after she goes to bed, but she gives it a good effort), and she feeds the animals. She can definitely make her bed – it is a toddler bed and she frequently makes our queen size one!

I didn’t realize just how much she already does until I asked this question… I’m glad I asked because it makes me appreciate her help even more.

Draw or paint a picture to record what happened today.

Dust
Fold laundry
Clean toilets (short, small hands to get under the rim & down the throat)

Clean toilets at 4?!

I don’t think I was even as tall as the toilet when I was 4…the only thing I ever had to do at that age was the same as what you said except for making the bed. My parents never had us do that unless someone was coming over. But I kept the room clean (at that age I shared with my brother) and I made sure I cleaned up anything that I left in another room.

As I got older, I loved helping out with housework. When I became even older, I would volunteer to vacuum the house (parts of it at least). I would ask my mom and she would be like “if you insist; I was dying to vacuum, but you can if you want”. :P

Picking up toys at that age can be overwhelming if there’s too many toys in the room, and how they’re stored requires arbitrary placement. But it’s a good age to teach “picking up as you go” as a skill.

I was started on socks and silverware. My mom taught me to sort and match using them.

My baby brother started by sharpening all the pencils; there were only wooden ones then.

I never had chores, except to keep my room clean, and clean up after myself. I don’t understand why a child has to clean up after adults or help with other household responsibilities.

My kids started with cleaning the table and then setting it, followed by putting the dirty dishes in the sink. My daughter quickly moved on to laundry-related chores and my son liked to “help” with yard work. Other than that, they were responsible for putting their own things away after they had used them and keep their rooms clean.

@JLeslie – One thought about having children do chores is simply to teach them how. Another is to teach them that chores do need to be done by somebody, and it goes faster if everyone works together.

Help with setting the table and possibly clearing the table.
Help with baking – measuring things out, mixing, etc.
Folding laundry, particularly towels and socks.

Until they are over 10, I suggest that all chores be shared. Work right along side with her in every task you do. Even my two ½ year old grandson loves helping me with everything I do. He helps with the cleaning, laundry, cooking, dishes, vacuuming and making beds. It takes twice as long to do anything with him helping, but the alternative is to not do anything, because he needs to be supervised even in his play.

@Darwin I did help my mom sometimes, it just was not a formalized responsibility that I was in trouble for if I did not complete them. I agree about the teach them how part, but most children want to learn how to do things, or help, or do it themselves, without it being a chore I think? I don’t have children, so I don’t think I am any expert or anything. I am just working off of my own childhood experience and time with my neice and nephews. I learned to set the table helping my mom or grandma set the table. I learned to cook, because it was a fun thing to do with my mom. I actually learned to sweep when I worked as a young teenager, I guess maybe it would have been good if my mom had taught me that?? My mom was not the best at keeping house.

My mom believed very strongly in not giving responsibilities to children that she perceives as the parent’s job. She frowns upon older children being burdened with taking care of younger ones, and thinks soon enough when a child becomes an adult they will have to cook and clean, etc. But, I can see the value in giving children some responsibilities.

Don’t worry @JLeslie, I never had any chores besides that either. There were no formalized duties or “chore schedules” (like I’ve seen in some people’s houses) or anything like that. I volunteered to vacuum and wash cars and every now and then I would be asked to take the recycling bins back or take out the recycles along with my siblings (mostly because my parents hated doing it so much), but other than that, not really anything outside of my own room except sporadic small duties. I also had my own section of the garden so I tended to that on my own. But I was never one of those “can’t play, have chores to do” kids. Just didn’t happen in my house.

I was like you in that I learned to cook and bake because it was fun to do with my parents. I learned to iron because I wanted to know how and from then on, I ironed whenever I wanted to. There were other things I’m sure, those are just the things that came to mind right away.

In our house chores are nothing more than being part of the family. There is no punishment if they aren’t done. They don’t get in trouble for not remembering a task, only for being rude or refusing when asked to help.

OTOH, it was very good for me that I had had to do some of these tasks sometimes as I was growing up. That way I knew how to do them once I went off to live on my own.

@Darwin I did not mean to imply you specifically would punish your child if chores were not done, I was speaking in general. I think there is no “right” way. It’s like allowance. I never got any, except for a few months in Jr. High when I asked for it. I consider myself very good with money. Some people think a child needs allowance to learn how to manage money, I would argue that is not true, but I don’t think allowance is a bad thing.

Interestingly, my husband, who grew up with maids and rarely needed to lift a finger, is much neater than I am. He is better at putting things away and less tolerant of things laying around. I think he grew up in such a well organized neat house that he just expects it to be that way, so as an adult he is willing to do whatever chore necessary. He might have learned some of it at an older age, that might be true.

@JLeslie I didn’t have an allowance either. We should be twins! :)

@DominicX I wasn’t worried :). But thanks.

@DominicX I do get the feeling we are the exception, not the norm.

this is kind of off topic yet somewhat relevant… my only chore growing up was to help my Mom dust, which I still despise to this day. I wanted to help with yardwork, cooking, washing dishes, washing laundry, gardening, sewing, mopping, etc. but she never allowed me to help with those chores.

Now that I am older and a parent myself, I think a large part of her reasoning echoes what @YARNLADY said, that it does take longer to do chores with small children sometimes until they get the hang of it. What a wonderful bank of memories it builds though, and as they gain a sense of accomplishment they can look back and over time come to understand how important teamwork, patience, and helping others are.

We do help her clean her room and pick up when there are several toys. She needs us there to guide her so she doesn’t get overwhelmed. I am trying to teach her to pick things up as she goes along.

I never had chores or an allowance. Now that I am an adult, I wish I’d had chores to get me into the habit of doing things I need to do now. Mom said she didn’t care if my room was a mess as long as I kept the door shut. I now fight a losing battle with keeping the house clean. I am hoping to gently guide my daughter in a better direction.

I completely agree with no punishment over chores. The “NO, I won’t” or other disrespectful responses are not acceptable, but I am otherwise laid back about when she gets it done. It is easy at this point because I can turn it into a game and she enjoys it.

@gailcalled I love the pencil sharpening!

putting toys back after playing with them.. maybe.. they are 4…cmon

She’s probably ready to learn how to sell extra clothing on eBay.

@susanc
YEA!

“Children in India as young as 4yrs old can fully facet (58 facets) round brilliant gemstones on a land lathe. My nieces and nephews couldn’t even tie their own shoes decently at that age.”

i think its time…

My dad had a good, yet simple way of getting me to do little chores. He used to tell me how much he used to enjoy these things when he was a kid! That’s it. Because he had enjoyed them as a kid and because I worshipped (still do of course) my dad I would want to like the same things he liked! I know now that he was, of course, lying but it worked for a while. :)

Gardening , pool cleaning and cooking .

@Supacase Makes sense. It will be interesting to see if the chores give her the habit. I always wonder about that. Mostly I think kids grow up to be like their parents or the opposite. Meaning whatever example you are setting is more important than anything. But. again, this is just theory on my part, I don’t have children, I am not an expert, and I have no date to even support what I am saying.

@JLeslie You may not be a motherr but you are a wise woman (which means I agree with you.)

@JLeslie: Don’t keep apologizing. I know lots of folks with kids who know far less about parenting than you – and demonstrate it regularly.

@JLeslie You could be absolutely right about the example set – my mom is just as messy as I am.

@Supacase I assumed that when you were talking about chores, you meant things that your 4 year old could do with you, not assume responsibility for on her own. Is that correct? I saw the question as a “helping out” with, not delegating to.

@Supacase still, I think your plan is worth a shot. I wish I was more organized and more disciplined.

@all I only clarify that I don’t have children, because almost every parent I know says it is harder then they expected. So, I respect the fact that I do not have direct experience on the matter and never want parents to think I am judging their parenting. Nothing worse then someone sounding like they know it all, and really they know nothing. But thank you for you kind words.