How do you become positive?

I suffered from severe depression and negativity for about 7ish years. The way I fought it off was by developing a “suck it up, kick ass” sort of attitude where I would fight tooth and nail any negative thoughts that entered my mind. I did this by replacing them with positive thoughts as best I could. Also, I developed a habit of telling myself that “things could always be worse, you could live in Sierra Leone.”

Then I got better, for the most part. Good luck.

Hope for the best, but prepare for the worse. We all need balance, and this requires a general, if not thorough, grasp on the real world. Don’t deny or dismiss anything until you see it for yourself.
I know nobody believes me but I’m pretty damn Zen in my every day life.
One defines the other…it may be all in how you look and perceive things, but for everything that happens, there’s something opposite to define it. Channel your forces towards that which you aspire to?

I have no clue.

Learn how to love yourself. Find the good thing in you that helped me.

positive and negative are 2 dogs in your tummy…. decide which one you want to feed .

Start thinking positively, and be around positive people, and learn how to appreciate yourself.

To be more positive one has to change the way of thinking in thier life.

Drink a bunch of beer.

Act yourself into a way of thinking.

I know it sounds simplistic, but it really works.

With months and even years of hard work by training your brain to pick up negative thoughts and turn them into positive ones. It’s hard to just turn into a positive person overnight, it takes time and dedication.

I read a self-help type book years and years ago. It said to smile no matter how you feel. The idea being that the very action of it tricks your brain a little. It has worked for me.possibly because I feel so ridiculous doing it

A couple years ago, I kept a negative thoughts journal. Get yourself a small notebook (something that will fit in your pocket) and write down the negative thoughts that pop into your head as they occur. You don’t need to do anything with those negative thoughts for 2–3 weeks; just get into the habit of becoming aware of them and writing them down.

Once you’ve learned how to spot your negative thoughts consistently, you need to analyze them critically. Most negative thoughts are the result of panicked “what-if?” and disaster thinking, where you take a small doubt and let it snowball into something huge that paralyzes you from taking action. Take the time to look at the negative thoughts in your journal and ask yourself as objectively as possible: is this really a rational thought? Is it really true that I’m incapable of ______, or so-and-so will happen if I try to ______?

At this point, when you’re writing down your negative thoughts, consider the actual, rational reality of that thought and write it down beneath the negative thought. Here’s an example from my journal:

“Thinking of the accomplishments of my friends makes me feel like a failure because I haven’t achieved anything yet.”
“Everyone goes at their own pace. I may not have done anything yet, but I’m working toward it. If I keep working at it, I’ll eventually have accomplishments to be proud of.”

You have to train yourself to think differently. Try to eliminate emotion and be rational. In the example above, my response to the negative thought wasn’t a silly optimistic fantasy; it was a realistic evaluation of the situation. Things are rarely as bad as they seem, and when they truly are bad, there are ways to fix them or alleviate the badness. Instead of walls, think about windows. Instead of wondering about how bad things can get, think about how they really are and what you can do to make things turn out best. There are always options.

I hope this method works for you. Good luck.

I recommend post-it notes, saying “be positive”. Use them as reminders, and put them everywhere.

Find what you love and do a lot of it. Positivity will flow from there.

Stop thinking about yourself and start volunteering to help others. And It’s the perfect time of year to do it.

According to psychology, it’s very difficult, if not impossible, to change one’s basic personality. So you may never become a Pollyanna-type optimist. But you can still learn to be more positive. Next time, when you encounter a troublesome situation, ask yourself, “What’s one positive aspect of this event?” At first, your thoughts might still have a negative focus. I.e., you might say, “I hate this job, but at least I’m not living in the gutter.” But if you keep practicing, then you will learn to identify things for which you’re grateful, i.e. “At least my job offers flexible hours.” It takes time.

@lonelydragon I strongly disagree with that statement. If anything, CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) has shown that it’s very possible to change one’s basic personality. Just as the unconscious mind can influence the conscious mind, there is tons of evidence (and my own personal experience) showing that the conscious mind can influence the unconscious mind as well. Change the way you think, change the way you behave, and you can change who you are.

@drdoombot I never said I was happy with the implications of that statement. If anything, hearing that from my psych professor was quite disheartening. But I have found it to be true to my experience. I am a shy person, and despite my best efforts, I’ve never gotten rid of that personality trait. To use another example, a person who’s pessimistic or a spendthrift can learn not to act on their compulsions and dial down the intensity of that trait, but they’ll always be tempted to be negative or spend freely.

If you have a different experience, I am interested in hearing it.

Find what you love about the things you do. What do you love to do at work? Focus on that (if you love NOTHING about work, maybe you need to switch jobs?)

Then at home, what do you look forward to? Do more of that. For example, sometimes I use whatever plans I have for the weekend or the evening, and I use that to look forward to when I’m doing something less than pleasant! I think, “I just have to get through this, in order to get that”