I can answer the question, but not the content, Dibley. What belakyre is saying is that we haven’t been given nearly enough information in order to offer suggestions that would help you.
For my husband and me, we’re both pig-headed as hell. Neither of us wanted to be trapped in a loveless marriage. In fact, the mere thought of it repelled us completely. Sometimes it comes in flashes, how much my husband loves me. But isn’t one to over emote, so I don’t have the benefit of daily insights as to the depth of his feelings. I have to stand on my own two feet and look at his overall performance. First of all, he married me.
Men have a kitchy way of showing their love. They don’t do it the same way women do, all touchy-feely and writing poems and crap. They’ll fix things around the house, fix the car, make money to support thier family, and not say a word when they’re grouchy, which is a gift when you think about it, except a lot of women think their man is closing up, when he should be talking to them. That isn’t the way of all men, though! They like thier caves, and like being able to retreat to it for some relaxation time.
I would, on occasion, enjoy a bouquet of flowers. What woman wouldn’t? But I’d rather have a man that I KNOW loves me, and do without the flowers. That just isn’t his thing. And if I don’t accept that about him, I run the very real risk of makig him feel inadequate as hell, just by bitching that I didn’t get flowers. I LOVE him, so I accept him for who he is. I don’t try to change him because there is nothing wrong with him. He is lovely, just the way he is. First of all, I married him.
