(NSFW) Women slow when on top?

(hope you don’t mind me answering this) Have to say, From a blokes point of view, I personally, prefer it in that position (Girl on top) if she goes slow-ish anyway as it is a deep and , for the guy, relaxing position anyway…...........
I think I know what you mean though, for some it can actually be quite a restrictive position. Especially if you are not used to moving about while effectively kneeling.
Have you tried being on top while near something to hold onto for support and to enable you to “go faster” as you put it? Maybe near the headboard, (just a thought – what do I know?) Don’t worry if he’s bashing his head on the headboard, it’s you, your worrying about! lol

Mmm. I know what you mean, and I feel the same way. I just take advantage of the situation and go a bit slower and deep, as @scotsbloke said.

Selfishly, I enjoy him on top so much more, but he’s a bigger fan of me on top.

@scotsbloke the best position I came up with, was him sitting on the couch, me sitting on his lap, and using the coffee table for resistance. It is a short table though. Maybe if I tried something higher up, I could get better leverage. We don’t have a headboard, just a wall.
There is this device someone found me, that is basically a small cot, with a hole in it for the penis. There are handles for the women to use, and the material looked like trampoline material.
@eeveegurl I really don’t like slow sex. My boyfriend does though. I agree 100%

@scotsbloke this is the one I was describing
or this one

@Violet I’m gonna sound like an incredibly old fart now, but have you spoke to him about it? Does he like it? Does he want you to go faster or slower? If you hate being on top during sex then I’m guessing he’ll be getting that vibe and might think he’s doing something wrong.
I dunno what lines of communication you guys have going but talking about it before during and after is a big part of a healthy active and Great sex life (or so I’ve heard, of course I’m a good boy)

Looking at the pic you sent, They look like fun, I had this vision of an 8ft Trampoline with enclosure for some reason…............ but seriously, if it’s within your budget, I can’t see your partner, boyfriend, husband (or all three! (grin)) NOT enjoying trying it out!
And remember – Variety is the key too, mix it up, only be on top for a wee while, then swap-a-roonie!

now I’m gonna order me a trampoline thingymabobber

@scotsbloke long story short: we have great communication about sex, he knows I don’t like to be on top, he also knows I’m trying and that I want to like it. I do try, but I feel like I’m terrible. He likes it slow, I do not.
I don’t want to pay for one of those seat things, and I don’t think we could make one safe enough.

Righto, Well, sounds like a compromise is in order then.
Even between consenting adults, in a sex situation, you shouldnt have to do something you dont wanna do, although you do it to make him happy, and you try to like it, if you don’t you don’t. You cant MAKE yourself like something, not really. not in my experience anyway.
Sounds like your between a rock and a hard place (no pun intended)

I’m willing to bet if you told him you’d prefer not to be on top, he’d likely be ok with it, especially if he knows you dont like it muchly.

Sorry but I feel like I am being no help whatsoever. Doh!
Hopefully voices of reason will come through as the day goes on…....

when my women is on top I prefer her to slow it down if its a pounding she wants we turn it around and she is on bottom…woman on top is more intimate to me it seems

@Gossamer – Totally agree, mind you it can also get a bit freaky up there too! – wah hey! – but then theres the danger of her falling off or worse, hurting the poor guy! ;0)

The serious side though is that it IS a very intimate, penetrating, position, I’ve heard some ladies say they feel more in control on top, which gives them an extra feeling to add the feelings already happening. I’m happy to be controlled like that, It’s one of my favourite positions to be honest.

need a cold shower now…............lol

I worry about exactly the same thing! Thank you fr asking this :)

@Violet, who says your legs need to be outside his? Why feel that you need to straddle him? Surely his hips are limber enough (and you’re slim enough) that he can spread his legs for you (this even works with her on the bottom, but it can be a bit more challenging then for him to stay in the saddle). In fact, if he spreads his legs and draws his knees up, then he can almost “wrap” you. Try it sometime; it’s sexy as hell.

I’ve that it’s much easier for me to make such quick pelvic movements than for females I’ve been with. It doesn’t really matter for that position, since it really is made up for by the depth reached. Fun.

@scotsbloke I am going after my wife for some fun right now ha ha =P then I will take that cold shower

Yeah, it’s definitely the legs being so far apart that slows us down. I really need to install some ropes or handlebars in my bedroom.

It’s all about the quadriceps – I find that the less I weigh and the more muscles I have, the faster I can go.

@Simone_De_Beauvoir – agreed. Cramps are not fun.

@eeveegurl I hear ya – I get ‘em.

Don’t aspire to fast. Aspire to medium. Fast increases the potential for injury.

Go sideways on the bed and use the headboard for leverage.

I happen to feel the same way. To be honest I have a way I lift my knees up and hop like a frog though lol. That gets tiring though, so then I just do the best that I can.

I’m pretty athletic, so its not really a problem.. but going “fast” always makes me feel like I could be squishing his junk. :P

I suppose it has to do with hip fittness. My best experience in sex was with a woman on top of me. She rode me really fast and it felt really good. When I analized it I found that she was also a great dancer and could move her hips really well. Besides that she had great boobs that kept me really focused

If the girl has short femurs and the guy has a wide build, it is almost impossible to go fast. It’s just not going to happen.

I can’t really go fast on top either (or maybe I don’t want to), but that doesn’t really bother me. A slow, deep sexy time is nice and I’ve been on top before, but I prefer being on bottom. I like how I can wrap my legs all the way around him when he’s on top of me. Being 5’9’’ and having long legs helps when it comes to the wrapping thing.

When I was in better muscular condition then this position wasn’t uncomfortable at all but in the past few years, weaker legs have meant going slow and even cramping before too long/just as the guy seems to really be feeling good :(

The best I recall this position being was when a partner was strong enough to bear my weight by holding my hips and assisting in the momentum. This requires a partner with arm strength and also want of participation beyond laying back with arms out but it’s fun.

@scotsbloke I want to want to be on top. Does that make sense? I do really like your advice.
@ubersiren installing something is a fantastic idea! We don’t own our own house, so that is what is holding us back. Our first buy, will be a sex swing.
@Leanne1986 I thought I was the only one! It makes me feel so much better to knwo I’m not.
@CyanoticWasp that sounds very difficult. Maybe my bf and I will have to try out some new positions. Are any of the positions your described on this site?
@Simone_De_Beauvoir oh dear, well, then it may take a long time for me to become strong/small enough. I’m not big, but I am not mean to be tiny..I have a Kim Kardasshian butt, and hips to match.

@kevbo we don’t have a headboard. Any other ideas? Something similar to what you’re describing that we do, is have him sitting on the couch, me sitting on his lap, and using the coffee table for resistance.
@dutchbrossis I did that last night! lol I feel like my sex is sloppy when I am in that position. Maybe I need more practice.
@meagan are there any positions in which you can not go fast, even though you are in great shape?
@cornbird could you describe her exact position?

@delirium I am pretty short, I never thought that as being an issue. Thank you

@Allie how exactly do you wrap your legs all the way around him? Are you in a lotus position?
@hungryhungryhortence We have tried that. It works pretty well!

@Violet, it’s not difficult at all. (Your link takes us back to this page, but I did look at sexinfo101.com, which seemed to be where you wanted it to go, and didn’t see anything there—at least on that one page.)

Imagine a typical missionary position, but with the woman superior… and with her legs inside the man’s. He may have to pull his knees up to make it comfortable for himself, but I can assure you it’s not at all difficult, even for a middle-aged guy who’s not in the best shape. (I’d be happy to show you. Repeatedly.) In that position he can use his arms to help support her upper body, or she could probably just rest her upper body on his chest with no ill effect.

@CyanoticWasp if the woman’s legs are on the inside, how is the penis able to get between them? And yes, that is exactly the link I was trying to post. I don’t know how I messed that up.. or how you knew which site I meant to post

@Violet My legs are bend at the knee. If you think about the body as a line, it would look like a Z. The bottom horizontal line being my upper body/back/spine area, the diagonal line being my thigh area, and the top horizontal line being the calf/shin/feet. The bottom point are my hips, the top point are my knees. I kind of turn my legs out for the thigh part and back in at the calf part. Like I said also, it helps to have long legs.
P.S. – I hope this was detailed enough to give you a good description.

Edit: I looked for it on the site @CyanoticWasp linked to. Here’s what I’m talking about.

@Allie oh I thought you were talking about you on top. The position you posted is one we do very often

I agree that the Woman gets control when she is on top but when you want to go Fast then the Woman going up and down has to synchronize with the Man Lifting his hips too. He can put his hands on the woman’s hips to help the synchronicity, I know this works because the Wife and I do this at least Two times a month when she has her period and Really Wants Fast…ok @Violet ?

@phil196662 we don’t have sex when I’m on my period..

But what about the week before when you might want to 3X’s daily?

@phil196662 Oh my god.. if you mean that your wife’s sex drive is crazy right before her period, I know exactly how she feels. The week before my period I’m incredibly horny, like, all the time. (I’m still not sure why this is.)

@Allie It’s natural instincts of procreation/reproduction. The body releases certain hormones at certain times of a woman’s cycle.

@phil196662 I never have sex more than once in one day

@Violet, it was a semi-serious offer. I’d be more than happy to show you. It was easy enough to hover over your link and see what the site was supposed to be.

@Violet ; Have you tried rubbing, stroking hair and brushing backs sides starting when you get up and throughout the day? You know, get up- kiss and hold, breakfast with arm around while cooking and then an ear kiss. Chasing around the store while shopping, sharing a lunch plate. All things that get ME going often causing the use of the reclining seats in the truck!
@Allie – Hormones! or as I spell it “HoreMoans” ... The Wife like to be handled Rough the rest of the month and during that week she gets Real sensitive Everywhere. So I grip her untill she gives me a look like “Your gripping kinda Hard” Only for me to go to another part of her body brushing areas as I go Only to make snacks when we get home so I can open some Wine (takes away the initial sensitivity) and get a glass or Two in her so I can do my job right through Pad Time…

@phil196662 I do some of those things occasionally. He just can’t go more than once in a day.

And Alluring outfits don’t get an additional Rise from him?

@phil196662 well of course, but he just physically can’t go 2 times in 1 day

I will have to agree that the relative sizes of the partners can play a role in this.

So lots of Hugs and kisses the rest of the day for him @Violet…

@Violet I saw the pictures of the device you referred to, Both designs are putting a lot of material between you and your lover. I have an idea (never tried it though):

The elastic doesn’t have to be below you. It can be above. What you will need is called an extraction harness.They are used by mountain climbers, rescue workers, military,etc. Cost new is about $200–300, but since you don’t need the safety certifcation you should be able to buy one surplus for a small fraction of this. This harness places two D-rings at your shoulders.

Using a simple framework made from steel tubing, attach yourself by the shoulder rings using bungee cords. You can adjust the degree of support and elasticity by varying the number and size of the cords used. It’s like being in a parachute harness.

Setting up and getting into such a device is going to be a bit more involved than the devices in your illustrations, but this has the advantage of there being no material between you and your lover. You can also adjust the “springiness” as I explained. The illustrated devices have a fixed degree of elasticity, based on your body weight.

The framework for such a device could also double as bondage equipment, with its overhead attachment points. Basically two vertical supports of suitable strength and a bar with two attachment points above.

@stranger_in_a_strange_land My bf and I don’t own our own house, so we can’t do that just yet, but we have been talking about it.

It just takes a few holes you can fill when you move @Violet !