My girlfriend just broke up with me, what should I do?

I think that you should move on. It sounds like you were just a rebound.

Let go dude and don’t look back. I had an ex with similar issues. She probably has self esteem issues. You are a decent guy where she can’t cope or compete with that where she needs someone to feel on par with. As hard as it may seem right now, forget about her, there are a lot of decent loving woman who will appreciate you as you are and for what you can bring to a relationship. Don’t settle for anything less than a girl who really appreciates you.

Thanks Cruiser, I think you’re probably right.

As hard as it is, let her go.. She needs to sort her life out and that is usually something one has to do alone. She is obviously not over this other dude and not ready to be in a realationship with you, or anyone for that matter..

She told me “I don’t want to lose you forever”... what would you think about a comment like that?

A comment like that sounds like she is wanting you to “wait” for her.. And my short response to that: Don’t.

I agree with @Cruiser, this young woman appears to have serious self-esteem issues. I just want to point out that just because something is right (letting her go is right), doesn’t make it easy. This will take time because it sounds like you genuinely care for this girl. Try to be patient with the healing process and know that every day it will get a little bit easier.

The “I don’t want to lose you forever” comment makes me think she wants to have her cake and eat it too. It makes me think that she wants to head on back to this loser, spend some time to see where it might go, and if she winds up unhappy (as is bound to happen), she would like to have you waiting in the wings. Unfortunately for her – but fortunately for you – that is not the way life works.

Oh dear. Having just gotten out of a relationship with a loser/pill head myself, I guess she hasn’t faced the reality of the situation yet. She feels something for him and doesn’t see that he feels nothing for her. Until she gets that through her head, she’ll continue on her path to self destruction. Get out of the way. She’s going to go down and she’ll take you with her if you allow it. I got out, and he’s circling the drain. Blaming me by the way. I left, moved, changed my phone number. I don’t understand the decision making process of these people, it should probably be the subject of several clinical studies. The fact remains that given a choice between a good life and clean people or a life filled with pettiness, wasted time, and really bad things happening due to hanging out with bad people, for some reason they choose the bad crap. You would think that given a chance at something better they would take it but they don’t. See my answer about promiscuity. What are her demographics. Raised in a single parent environment? Low income? These things all tie together and affect life choice decision making capabilities. She really does need therapy for a lot of reasons. She sounds like the typical classifications of one of the ones who most need it, are least likely to seek it or benefit from it if she did.

@Trillian thanks for the advice…and for the demographics, she’s white, middle income family I’d guess, very intelligent, law student, valedictorian of her class in high school, her parents are still married and apparently very much in love. She grew up in a big family, and went to a small school.

hey RandomMrDan long time buddy! Sorry to hear about your situation

Great advice here from the collective…I don’t have much more to add except try and remember that you can’t change a person or have the objective in mind of ‘fixing them’ as a solution to the relationship. Perhaps the best thing to do for the both of you is to say your piece to her, and then move on. I agree with @SuperMouse on the point that she wants to have her cake; make it clear and final as to where you stand and that you’re not her (or anyone’s) doormat. You deserve better than that.

Thanks everyone, I’ll say my piece, and move on.

Some women just like the trashy men of the world. its a challenge for them or they have psychological problems. you have been dumped. let it go and find someone else. any man that pees in a cup, rather than going to the bathroom, either has a drug problem or is physically ill. you know the answer to this question. how about the drugs? maybe, she’s also an addict and misses his sharing of his drugs with her. ever thought about that?

While you should just let her go and look forward, keep in light contact with her. One day she may be rid of her problems and infatuations and be ready to be with just you.

I suggest you move on. You are only 25 and there are many other girls out there that is waiting to get in a relationship. Being hooked up on one girl too soon is not a good idea. You need to experience more relationships.

i would agree with anonymousgirl.just let go sometimes girls just aint sure what they want so thell jump from boyfreind to boyfreind.

You suffer, you chase your tail and hers and eventually you get over it or get back with her.

Supaku!!!! Or whatever that ninja death thing is called.

Dan do you need a hug? lol

No seriously, we could probably string this guy up…..

@westy81585 @RandomMrdan is a father now, he can’t be doing things that might potentially get him sent to the big house.

@SuperMouse lol, I’m well aware…. It was a joke my dear.

@westy81585 I know it was a joke! Sorry I didn’t use the ~ thingy to denote sarcasm!

i think it time to say bye. get out while you can before it gets worse

I’ll be fine, I’m one day closer to being normal I guess.

@RandomMrdan It’s alright, we’ll come over and get you drunk

I myself was dating a ex pillhead/cokehead for 2 years.i am from N.Y. and moved to florida for a second home and to start a business.My pops and me stayed in florida while the rest stayed in new york.Anyway i dated a girl in new york for 8 years and was treated like gold but we broke up and it was rightly so.Then i meet this girl at a out-patient drug rehab couse i always liked painkillers and got way ahead of myself,so i went for treatment.So i meet this girl and she was hot.So she got my attention and next thing we know were dateing.So months go by and she wound up getting pregnant,Had an abortion (which i was against but it’s her body so i went along with it).I knew she had an ex-boyfriend slash drug buddy.He called alll the time and she said she would handle it,She never did so i got on the phone with this clown an told him whats up an did not here for him for a while.I am not the type to snoop around so maybe she was talking to him.I wound up getting a nice apt for us to live cause she lived with her grandma and wanted to live with me.Eventually the business was sold my fam moved back and i wound up with a better job.So we dated for about a year now and she was alway’s telling me she was bored and lonely.So i sugested she get a job so she can help out with bills and do something with herself.I couldn’t bring the circus to her everyday to keep her occupied.So her uncle gets her a job at a rehab facility,And it was fine for a week.Then one night i shower after work and our hours were different so she was sleeping.I hear her phone ring none stop for 10 minutes,so i pick it up and it is some dude texting her asking for pics,so i call the number flip out on the guy,wake her up and kicked her out.A week later she is crying and all that stuff wanting to get back.I said no and then a couple days later i called her and asked for my key back.Next thing i know i am fist-fighting some loser with his kid in the car,I wind up getting the best of him and he ran away.So i get a call late that night with her crying and wanting to get back.I truely loved her so i took her back.Bad move.I wind up dateing for a few more month’s and im in the car with her one day and guess who calls.Her ex-boyfriend who was saying she told him she still loves him and all that shit so i told him that when he is back from the military(I never knew the military accepted drug addicts but i guess they do)So anyway i tried to really watch her close and wind up loseing my job cause of all the drama.I have a skill where i can get the same job somewhere else anytime i want.But i could not go on interviews cause i was worried about her doing shady shit when i was gone.So I finally get the courage to leave to new york cause bills were pileing up.So i tell her let me go and i will send for her in a month or so.So she comes down to new york .Spent the holliday with my family and then goes home.I tell her to just let me get myself back together and we will be together shortally.She was fine with that cause she had some scooling she had to receive.I call her day’s after she visited and next thing you know she is with some new dude.Totally abused me and made up a story to her family that i was abusive and a drug addict,everything she was..Well it has been almost a year since i talked to her(cause i called her every name in the book,so she cut ties and changed her number).So i needed some answers and started emailing her best friend and the friend told me not to bother and that she does this all the time…..So the meaning of this story is that no matter how much you try.There is alway’s another asshole who will believe the girl and think that her exboyfriends are at fault for there breakup and that some girls are just crazy and look at guy’s as to how much they can get out of them.Not all women but there are alot of girls that think they are player’s and really don’t have feelings towards what they do or are just so into themselves that they think they can alway’s do better.I am doing great now and have girls that i dated,But us as men and women should wait till u find that real special person. don’t settle and try dating different girls and pick the best one for you cause being unhappy and treated great or being happy and treated awful is just settling.I been on both sides and will never settle again…

@maddog1980 thanks for the story, it sounds like it was awful at the time.

As of now, we are broken up still. And I just started hanging out with another girl, and feeling things out still. In fact we’re going out for a few drinks here in a couple hours to relax a bit, and enjoy each other’s company. So, I’m come to the realization that the drama just isn’t worth it, and I’m letting it go. All of my friends have told me I deserve better than that, and it started to finally sink in a couple weeks ago.

Thanks again everyone for the tips, and advice.