Sexy. Sexiness. Could it go hand in hand with sleaziness, too?

I can’t. Ok, maybe a quick one.
Sexy is overrated as the only thing looked for in a person. Of you’re not sexy you apparently have no value. Was it Gloria Steinem the one who said that women are judged by their ability to attract multiple men? The older I get, the more I hate to hear terms like “He’s hot” I need to know what you have between your ears. I’m more interested in conversation and I’ve found that most men who are “hot” really don’t have much to say that’s worth listening to. I don’t know when the gym closes and don’t care about that big jar of creatine powder.
The way you look is not what defines you, the same way that your sexual orientation should not. Or your gender. Or your race. If the only thing you have to offer society is the way you look, I don’t need to speak with you. And I’m sure you aren’t interested in speaking with me because I’m not going to fawn all over you.
Where was I headed with this?
Oh, sleaze, sexy, whatever.
There are lots and lots of men and women out there for whom this is the beginning and end of their interest. Hopefully, a good percentage of my family of flutherites (?) are not among them.

Or does sexiness automatically mean sleaziness?

What?

what about innocence, purity or virginity

Considering these are all terms spread by the fathers of yesteryear that sold their daughters as property – antiquated, outdated and, quite frankly, negative constructs – I wouldn’t want any of those terms attached to a woman I desire. In fact, I’d take a mature, impure, sexually experienced woman over a nigh child any day.

This is the issue I have with this question.

Your definition of “sleaziness” seems to be “Not Pure.” I can’t answer this question properly if this is the case.

Sleazy sexy
Celebrity sexy
Slutty sexy
Sex kitten sexy
Innocent sexy

They all can be sexy to me. They can all turn me on. But in the end, I need a relationship. I need love. If they don’t make me feel like I’m the center of their world, they aren’t sexy at all. If I am the center of her world and she is the center of mine, then I don’t care whether she looks hung over and in dirty clothes. She is still sexy to me, and I still want her, right then and there.

Of course I like it when she dresses to kill. But that’s just showiness. It is, as @Trillian said, what is between her ears and what is in her heart that makes the difference for me.

Now if we’re just talking the image of sexiness—then any of that can be sexy. Whatever you see in a dirty mag or porno or Maxim or Cosmopolitan or Victoria’s Secret or the movies. It all works on me. It’s a place for me to hang my fantasies.

But when it comes down to it, my fantasies are about love. For me, sex is how love is expressed. So if I don’t love her, she ain’t one bit sexy. Believe me, she’s sexy as hell!

Thanks @daloon. That response renews my faith in the male species. And after all the negative things I’ve been thinking about you all for the past couple of weeks too. I gladly take it all back. ...ok, maybe not all of it, I know one schmuck for sure who deserves my censure. But most of it. I take most of it back. Thank you.

Is there a full moon tonight? The questions, oy vey ist mir.

@Grisaille Okay.

@gailcalled Full moon was over a few nights ago

@Trillian You’re welcome. I’m sorry you’ve been running into so many incompetent guys. Most of us actually are interested in your thoughts, opinions, concerns and desires, and will go to many lengths to please women. We do want to learn and we do learn. Of course, that requires good communication—not such an easy thing to accomplish. Both parties have to work hard at it. Have more faith.

@gailcalled Ich bin mit a bisele sex on da mind, lately, so sue me? Nu?

Sexiness is a property of the brain. It’s not a function of the attractiveness of the body or even how much of it is exposed in public.

Sleaziness is the exploitation of attractiveness and the use of gratuitous exposure of the body to attract attention for personal gain.

Some of the sexiest women in any group can only be identified by getting to know them, not by looking at them, or undressing them!

Sexy is all about subtlety. Barley contained fire. Sleazy is just sleazy.

@Dr_Lawrence Agree, my friend. Me feareth I haven’t asked the question properly, nor written very good details conveying my personal opinion on the matter.

The women whom I’ve had the most intimately satisfying experiences haven’t always been the prettiest, most conventionally beautiful or even “sexy,” i.e., what is usually considered sexy (Marilyn? Madonna?Cher? I dunno).

The woman with whom I had the best sex with ever, is the woman I fell in love with. Over the years, and those of you 40 and over can identify, gravity et al takes its toll. I do not even notice these things – for I see only her, especially her smell, her touch her smile her love for me, my love for her, in a nutshell.

Better?

@Zen_Again We are on the identical frequency, Chaver.