What is the grossest thing your kid has done without knowing how gross it was?

Well, since I don’t have any kids I’ll share a story about my younger sister.

When she was a baby, JUST learning how to crawl, she was booting it around on the floor while my Mum was cleaning… well, she found something behind the couch. We had a cat at this time, a long haired one..

She ate a whole hair-ball and left the liquidly, bile mess behind.

I’M gagging now!! Sick!

This thing happened and I didn’t find out about it for a few minutes. My son slept in the top bunk. One night I woke up to his crying, so I went in to find out what was wrong. He had been throwing up, and as I walked into his room, he had spewed over the railing edge and out over the carpeted floor. Since it was night, I walked into the room in darkness, and promptly walked all over it with bare feet.

When I was around 4–5 or so, I touched a hypodermic needle that was on the ground in a public place. My mom freaked out quite a bit. I got tested for HIV and a bunch of other things. I was fine. But man, how stupid was I… :P

This isn’t tremendously unusual as anyone who works with young children can attest but I’ve had to clue in many a child as to why picking their boogers and eating them in public is gross. They seem genuinely baffled about it as they are quite enjoying themselves :)

My son would pull the poop out of his diaper and smear it everywhere. Even his face. I had to start putting him to bed on onsies.

@ElleBee That takes the cake, no doubt about it. I don’t think I’ll eat until I can forget that story haha

Not my child, but I was a parent volunteer at the parochial school my children attended, and had playground monitor duty. A kindergartener found a used condom in the grass, and had it to her lips, trying to blow it up like a balloon.

My son used to smear poop on the bathroom wall. Last night he French-kissed our American Bulldog. The dog seemed to enjoy it so my son couldn’t understand why we made him stop.

I don’t have kids but my nephew puts his fingers in his mouth and wipes the bottom of his shoes. Gross!!

@borderline_blonde : hahaha thanks!

Here is another!

Last summer, my roommate’s brother came over for dinner; along with his wife and 2 year old daughter. (My SO was there too.) Well, we we’re all at the dining room table having dinner while the little girl was running around playing with my roommate’s 2 little dogs. Now, these dogs are horribly spoiled and they have a litter pan because they are to chicken to go into the back yard. It’s just off the dining room.

While we we’re all chatting and eating our meals, I looked over at the little girl only to see her pop a dog turd in her mouth, it was hanging out like a cigar!! I screamed, my SO and roomie started gagging uncontrollably, the brother/Dad was in shock and her Mum started to cry. It was all in slow motion and you could see the look on her face slowly turn sour. (gags)

We still laugh about it! All I can say is, thank god it was not my daughter! The little girl’s nickname now is “Pooper”. Hahahaha

@Darwin ROFL! French kissed your bulldog? That’s too funny.
Well, this isn’t exactly gross but when my son was 3 or 4 he used to eat bugs. Yes, bugs. One time I caught him popping a bug in his mouth and I said, “Chris! Don’t eat bugs!!”
Chris says, “Thas not bugs! Thas just a misquitho!” (lisp here! I miss that….)

Hahaha… she’s referring to my 2 year old son letting another kid put a wad of gum in his mouth that was found on the floor at the mall play area. Nasty!

Geez, some of these are gross! LOL at @Darwin and your bulldog.

Man, some of these are downright disgusting…!

I must’ve missed out on several milestones here. As a kid, I always thought eating boogers and feces and kissing dogs was gross, but call me crazy… :P

@Val123 – The bad thing about it was she’s an American Bulldog, not a French Bulldog. (drum roll, cymbal crash). ~

When I was a baby my mother found me chewing on a toilet brush.

Ich and nod of recollection!

Maybe we humans aren’t as fragile as we would be lead to believe by all the “OMG! GERMS” ads put out by the cleaning agent companies….

@Val123 We’re definitely not fragile, but I still don’t want to eat dirty, pre-chewed gum, or a cat’s hairball.

@ubersiren Of course not! Totally gross, even if it is probably harmless. I wouldn’t want to eat grubs either, although I’ve heard they’re a good source of protein. My only point is, to hear the Germ-a-phobes tell it, every one of those kids should have dropped dead on the spot!

When my oldest son was an infant, my wife and I were awakened to the sounds of laughing and singing. We laid quietly in bed for some rime, just listening to how cute he sounded and how he was able to amuse himself, We almost broke out in laughter because of his apparent ability to create his own imaginary world. Finally, we got up to check on him and discovered he had been painting the wall next to his crib, using his completely full diaper as the palette.

@Rufus_T_Firefly, I wish I had put my sons poop and smear stories so eloquently.

@Judi – Just doing my doodie, Maam.

Ah, @Rufus_T_Firefly, you should be PUNished for that.

@Darwin – Yeah, I usually catch a lot of crap for those. Sometimes I just can’t help myself, though. You know what I always say, though, ” Outside of a dog, a pun is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.”

@Rufus_T_Firefly Groan!

I don’t have kids, but my mother sure enjoys this story about me!

@avvooooooo – Well, somebody had to clean it up, didn’t they? I’ll bet you were a cute little piggie, though. LOL

@Rufus_T_Firefly Yeah, apparently!

Fiancee took his kids camping and fishing. The two boys challenged each other to eat a live fishing bait worm, the big fat long red ones and eat them they did. Later on they caught crawdads from the lake and roasted them to eat at the campfire. Ick.