My ex SO called me and was so sad- didn't mean it to be like this, what do I say?

Recall the reason(s) you left him. Do those still exist? If so, there’s no reason to reconsider your decision.

The definition of insanity is sometimes said to be doing the same thing over and over, yet expecting different results. Ponder that the next time he says “I’ll never do it again”, and does. Basically, the more you expect him to change but he doesn’t, the less you love who he really is – you love who you wish he was. Sorry you’re going through this. It’s not easy.

What do you want to say?

It is not your job to fix him or rescue him!

How long have you been over? Are you saying you want to be back with him? I don’t really understand what you are asking.

Dont fix anything, before he gets drunk and “fixes” youre eyes.

Is your so an alcoholic? if so, if you are going to stay with him, you’d better get use to “i’m sorry”, from him. is he worth the effort? only you can answer this question.

I dated a man who was “lovely”, until he drank too much…he said he only got angry and had tantrums when he was drinking….but, he was always drinking…the only time he didn’t drink was when he was at work. I broke up with him. He hasn’t quit drinking, and is now blaming his angry tantrums on other things….you can’t help, unless he knows he has a problem and wants help.

yes, I know, but I can do without booze and I love a bit of wine—if he loves me as he says wouldn’t I come before the third drink? and there’s no sex after that. so I reckon he loves booze first.

If he has a drinking problem, then the best way that you can help him is to not see him until he is sober.

Go to an Alanon meeting and get insight and support for your decision.

To counteract the sadness, do as someone above suggested and recall the bad times, the things that caused your beak-up.

You want to go back to him because you pity him. Do you think that is a wise thing to do? Also, it’s not your job to fix his drinking problem. The best thing you can do to fix it is be strong and leave. That way if he really wants you back he won’t act sad, he’ll stop drinking.

when I get to a point where i really miss an so and start thinking i’m about to do something stupid, I call my best friend who reminds me why i left him in the first place.

“My ex SO called me and was so sad” “He is a lovely man until he drinks too much”

You are being played, in the most despicable form. Staying away is the best way YOU can help.

I think do what you can to help him. once you know for sure he is helpless than stop.at least you tried.