What causes a person to be afraid of talking to other people?

It’s a kind of social phobia, and it’s not that important what the cause is (it usually begins with a shy temperament.) What’s really important about it is that, as you discovered, it doesn’t have to last. Good on you.

@pdworkin Thanks. I have this thirst for knowledge, though. I want to understand my behaviour and why I did the things that I did. I also want to understand why the people around me do the things that they do. I’ll probably wonder about it until I get an answer I’m satisfied with. Maybe I’m just weird like that. You have a good point, though.

Well, a baby with a shy temperament gets treated a different way by its parents than an outgoing baby, so the trait starts getting exaggerated sometimes, in a kind of a feedback loop.

Why it was teachers in particular who terrified you probably had to do with a couple of bad experiences that reinforced the shyness in that area. You may never know exactly, but as an example, some teachers yell at little kids in pre-school and Kindergarten. If that happened a few times, that would do it.

I’m not exactly sure if anyone yelled at me in Kindergarten. I vaguely remember something that caused me to not like my Kindergarten teacher very much, but I don’t remember exactly what it was. A lot of my Kindergarten memories have been blocked out. I had a French teacher in Grade 4 who took me outside of her classroom and yelled at me. She pretty much told me that I couldn’t come back into the class unless I talked to her and that she felt like I hated her or something like that. I ended up bursting into tears and still, to this day, I avoid her like the plague. She’s visited my parents a lot over the years. It may seem like a lot to me, though, because of that small event that happened so long ago that still affects me to this day.

@AnonymousGirl, you’re young yet. By the time you get to my age you’ll be wanting to forget all of your past behaviors.

And by the time you get to @pdworkin‘s age, you may have succeeded.

Acceptance. People seem to think that people won’t like who they really are. When in reality the opposite is normally true.

@CyanoticWasp & @pdworkin: Well, that’s good to know. How old are you two, anyway? You don’t have to answer, but I’m just curious. I’m 19, so you’re not wrong about me being young.

@willbrawn Interesting. I think that might actually have a lot to do with it. Thanks.

@AnonymousGirl, I’m ancient. He’s older.

fear of reprisal, looking stupid, authority, appearing different, ostracization… (self esteem and self assurance issues, tons of kids have them in different manifestations) any number of things might cause something like that. The important thing is you got past it :D I still have a fear of speaking in public, had it since elementary school though I’ve learned to get over it in the last 10 years for the most part. My first minute or so is always a little ugly but after that I’m hard to shut up.

I’m 60, but, like all of us, I still secretly think I am 17 and am just being betrayed by mirrors.

Well in my cause I have pretty moderate anxiety when talking to people that I don’t know. I don’t know why but even when I was little I was always afraid to talk to people and it caused some social hiccups as I was growing up. I can control it better these days, but people anxiety can be very serious.

@AnonymousGirl What pdworkin said is correct. It’s also possible that if you didn’t have a positive relationship with your parents when you were growing up, you developed a generalized fear of all authority figures, including teachers. Even if you had a good relationship with your parents, you may be afraid that if you speak up, teachers will judge you negatively.

I’m sorry to hear about your bad experience with your 4th grade teacher. As if you were suddenly going to start speaking up after she yelled at you! Unfortunately, outgoing people are sometimes intimidated by shy people because they can’t tell what we’re thinking. And even if they aren’t intimidated, they don’t always know how to deal with quiet, non-participatory students in an effective way. My AP lit teacher directly stated that people who didn’t talk in class were either stupid or that they had nothing to say. So just because his arrogant self couldn’t hear their thoughts, then they must not be having any! Sometimes I think teachers could benefit from a little training to deal with shy students.