How can I stop myself from being too jealous in a relationship?

I’ve read the self-help books, I’ve had the advice of friends. I could tell you to go into another room, take a walk to cool down, I could say hold it inside and use a fake smile, tell yourself first thing in the morning to be nice…etc.

I tried all that. It fixed the symptoms for awhile, but none of it worked in the long term.

What it comes down to is self-power. Whose gonna rule – you or the jealousy? Who do you want to rule? You have to grab that jealousy by the throat and strangle it – with your own two hands. Once you gain mastery of it – once its your slave – everything else falls into place. It becomes much easier to regulate and use, for healthy uses.

After you have muzzled your jealousy, than its the time to ask those close to you for advice. They know ya better, and usually know what will work best for you.

Jealousy is simply and clearly the fear that you do not have value. Jealousy scans for evidence to prove the point – that others will be preferred and rewarded more than you. There is only one alternative – self-value. If you cannot love yourself, you will not believe that you are loved. You will always think it’s a mistake or luck. Take your eyes off others and turn the scanner within. Find the seeds of your jealousy, clear the old voices and experiences. Put all the energy into building your personal and emotional security. Then you will be the one others envy, and you can remember the pain and reach out to them.

Date only people you despise.

very very good answers people.

@blinkErri….WOW…I am really going to make a note of this, thats the best advice I’ve read in a while. thanks.

I used to have a lot of jealousy issues and in the end it came down to two things:
1— I thought I wasn’t worth staying with.
2— I was with people who didn’t deserve my trust.

I have major jealousy issues. I never had them before this relationship, but I’ve never been with someone this gorgeous. I don’t believe I deserve him. I believe he deserves better. I am overcome with jealousy just when he goes to work. He can easily find someone better and I am very aware of that.

The only way to stop being jealous is to become secure in your own self worth. Stop wallowing in doubt and self deprecation. Look at your reflection in the mirror and KNOW you have value, no matter what may happen with your current relationship.