I'm not far enough in debt to get debt relief, but im just far enough behind where I can't get ahead. How can I become debt free when I seem to be stuck?

Welcome to life.

Sometimes you just have to deal with bad credit until you have the means to take care of it. Survival is your first priority, this means shelter, food, and environmental control (electric). Any other expense is secondary. Prioritize your expenses. Cable is not a priority. Internet is not a priority (unless it is your source of income). Means of attaining your income is a priority (ie gas, car insurance, car payment). Once you have everything sorted out, make a budget and try to put money towards your debt. $3500 is nothing to scoff at, but in the big scheme of things it is not the end of the world.

I agree with Shuffle.
Getting your priorities right is the fundamental basic step out of this.
Not all do this though. I have friends who owe loads and yet still keep re-newing cell phone contracts at 60 dollars a month, and still retaining a land-line. All she does on the cell phone is talk a lot of rubbish to her pals all day!!
Some people just cannot budget. Is there a course you could go on about budgeting?

my fiance is amazing with budgeting and now that i am working again i am thinking of letting her take the helm of the budget. we are getting married in may so im not concerned of her stealing or anything like that. i just am resistent of not having control over my income evan tho i have been bad at it.

@Shuttle128 is absolutely correct. Don’t over-stress about your “tanked credit.” You can rebuild that. The first step to financial re-health is to make and stick to a budget. Focus on spending for things you absolutely need, as @Shuttle128 says, and on paying down your debts, smaller ones first. Making CONSISTENT payments is essential. It’s also a good idea to contact your creditors to assure them you have every intention of paying them off. By the way, you’re really quite lucky that you’re addressing this issue now, before the $3500 turns into many more thousands. And kudos to you for raising this issue in Fluther. Doubtless many of us are having the same or worse problems. (Email me privately if you want more tips.)