Have you ever had an internet relationship?

How old are you?

It depends on what kind of relationship he wants, and if you agree with that.

It also depends on your age, if you’re a kid, its kind of creepy. If you’re an adult, then there really shouldn’t be much of an issue. Some people are much more open on the internet, than others.

15 and he know it to, he wants to like cyber and then he talks normally and I’m just confused…he also like messes with my head I think.

15? Than its a two way thing. How do you get good or bad vibes from the guy? If your gut says he’s bad news, than I would go with that. If not, you can try it, and if something goes wrong, then you can block.

@Spinel
both…one minuite he is creepy the next he is really sweet.

I have some serious reservations about internet relationships. You have no idea whether or not this person is who they say they are, they could easily be lying to you. At age 15, I would advise you to forget about online relationships and focus on people you actually know.

@disturbed_broken Which is predominate?

Block his ass, young lady.

No offense (and this embarrassing to ask) but, are you a guy yourself or a girl? If you’re female, than a 20 year old guy being interested in you has bad implications.

There is something wrong with any man aged 20 seeking a relationship with a girl who is 15.

@Spinel
he is more nice but he keeps on saying this girl commited suicide because he didn’t admit he loved her and now she is in a coma…
I just don’t know what to believe.

Real life is better than cyber life. Get a real life. Meet real people. Have real fun. This sounds creepy and weird. I suggest you block him right now.

And I am a girl (my avatar is kind of pink ;) )
And I’m seriously scared of all guys..so I guess this makes it easier.

@disturbed_broken That sets off alarm bells in me. When I was your age, I had a “nice” guy who called himself “Larry” IM me. He started out alright, but than he told me a story about how his then recently deceased girlfriend had killed herself in a car wreck because of an argument with him (I was like WTF?!). A week later, he asked me for my address. If you want to avoid probable grief, boycott the guy.

It’s hard enough to trust someone in real life. Trusting them online is even harder. No one needs that stress at age 15.

As @Qingu said, BLOCK HIS ASS. Don’t have anything to do with him.

Its one thing to start something online when you’re an adult. Its an entirely different thing to start something online as a teenager, especially with an adult. End it now, don’t say another word to him, don’t let him mess with your head, block and forget.

He said if I ever stoped talking to him he would kill himself he would be so sad.
I just feel guilty for feeling So attatched to him.
he said he also knew where I lived.

@disturbed_broken You’ve run into a controller. It’s a breed of man you don’t want to get tangled with. He merely wants you as prey. He is saying those things to scare you into staying in contact with him.

Block now before your sucked into a destructive cycle. What he does with himself isn’t your responsibility.

@disturbed_broken, he is obviously manipulating you. And he is threatening you.

Why would you ever want to get involved with someone like this?

@disturbed_broken First off, you are too young for this. You need to cut off communication, and honestly? From the creepy things he is saying to you, it sounds like you should inform a parent or an adult you trust.
Chris Hansen would know what to do.

@Qingu
I didn’t but he seemed so
nice I started to get more and more attatched and I just feel so guilty!
and I really like him but he scares me he said he can’t
believe he wants to F*** a 15 year old.
He scares me but I’m so confused….

You have absolutely no obligations to someone you only know over the internet.

I would advise you to cease all communication with this person immediately.

What exactly is there to be confused about?

Regardless of your feelings for him, your age, or anything else—you should not be in a relationship with someone who scares you and threatens you. Period.

The fact that he obviously is manipulating you by threatening suicide is icing on the cake.

@disturbed_broken Girl, ya’ gotta’ pull yourself together. @Qingu has said “block him” more clearly than anyone else on this thread, and its best to follow that.

Now I do understand, to have a “nice” 20 year guy contact you feels special. I’ve been there, in your situation, only my “guy” was called Larry (as I’ve already said). People told me to block him back then, but I didn’t listen. As the months passed, his messages got more graphic and violent. He began spamming my mailbox, my IM…everything. Soon he targetted me and wanted pictures of stuff no good man in his 20’s would ask for from a young teenage girl. In other words, he was stalking me, full speed. Even after I blocked him, he made new email accounts and continued to hanunt me. Believe me, you DON’T want to go through that. Block now, or its gonna’ get ugly.

This is what I’m confused about
I’m so scared of guys at school I cant even go to a classroom first with a male teacher
or be in a
classroom alone
with a male or talk to any older guys and I’m even terrified of my friends my age who are male.
And in the Internet it’s easier. And I can’t talk and not have bad anxiety.
And he confuses me because he seems normal most of the time..

I’ve gone through something similar, and I remember how much I cried out of fear that my online companion would hurt himself.

The thing is, you can never know for sure who you’re talking to online. He could be a sexual predator, yes. He could be some messed up 20-year-old. Either way, you can’t give him what he needs to get better. You don’t have to stop talking to him, if you’re still worried, but don’t get too close, in case he isn’t what he seems. Offer what support you can, send him information that might help him. Or, for your own sanity, cease all communication with him.

Eh, it’s not going to work out, even if you try.
How people are on the internet, and in real life are rarely the same thing.

@disturbed_broken With your condition, associating with this older man will give birth to a situation worse than the one I found myself in (which I described above for a reason).

So is it a never ending cycle?

@spinel that sucks!
He has asked for pictures
and sent me 3 graphic pictures….
I didn’t send him pictures…

@disturbed_broken Then the cycle has begun. You really need to get out…I can’t stress that enough. :(

“Graphic pictures”? As in, sexually explicit pictures?

Yes pictures of him self naked in the mirror and 2 pictures
of his organ*...

Guy sounds like trouble. I say boot him. Or better yet, report him to the Internet Police. That kind of behavior, especially towards a minor, is criminal.

@shadling21, he’s threatened her, and he’s manipulated her by threatening to hurt himself if she stops talking to her. He’s sent her “graphic pictures” and asked for pictures of her. That isn’t someone crying for help, that’s being a predator. Not only can she not help him but even trying would just be playing into his hands.

@disturbed_broken, I don’t want to get personal, but it sounds like you have some issues. Which is totally fine. And I can understand the appeal of talking to guys on the internet; it does seem “safer.”

In some ways the internet is safer, because you can control what you type easier than when you’re talking in real life. I actually don’t think there’s anything wrong with forming internet relationships if they are with people you can actually trust.

But that’s the problem with the internet—it is extremely difficult to know who to trust. It is very easy to lie to people on the internet. And most importantly, this guy is CLEARLY not someone you should trust. At all. You should block him immediately and forget about him.

As for your issues with guys, I don’t know what to tell you other than you shouldn’t worry about it that much. You will meet someone someday in real life who you feel comfortable with—perhaps you can even ask a boy you know in real life for his screen name and talk to him online. That’s what I did with a girl I ended up dating in high school. Whatever happens, don’t let it drive you to irresponsible behavior. Like talking to 20 year old sexual predators on the internet.

Yep, he’s a sexual predator. That is harassment right there – sending you photos.

I understand your concern for a stranger who seems like a friend, but this seals it. Block him! You’ll feel so much better!

BLOCK HIS ASS!

You should actually call the police on him for sending graphic pictures to, for legal purposes, a child.

I don’t care what he threatens, there are NO consequences for blocking him. He’s not going to off himself (though he should for being a CREEPY SEXUAL PREDATOR).

BLOCK HIS ASS! NOW!

@avvooooooo I would call the police but I had to deal with them and make a statment because of someother guy in real life family member predator problem and don’t want
to get involved with them again….
I go and block him and then I just feel
really bad and unblock him I am officially the stupidest person on earth!!

@disturbed_broken Stop unblocking him. He doesn’t deserve to talk to you. He doesn’t deserve to live outside of jail, actually, but he really doesn’t deserve to talk to you. He doesn’t deserve your sympathy, thoughts, time, anything.

Block him and forget about that creep.

@avvooooooo
but I already feel I’m not worth it am disgusting and I deserve this…

You don’t have to call the police.

Just calm down and think about what this person is. He is five years older than you. He has repeatedly threatened you. And he wants pictures of you, naked I’m assuming, since that’s what he’s sent you.

Every second you spend talking to him is a second you are letting him manipulate you.

Frankly, if you ever want a healthy relationship with a guy, you’re going to need to learn how to tell the difference between trustworthy guys and creeps you should ignore.

And no, you absolutely don’t “deserve” a creepy internet predator, and no, you are not disgusting. You are 15! I didn’t even kiss a girl until I was 17; I bet lots of people here can say the same. Be patient, stop thinking of yourself like that, and wait for a guy who you can trust and respect.

@Qingu thanks, a year ago I was in an abusive relationship..so I guess I just feel crappy and worthless and feel like guys and everyone hate me and are better than me.
I just feel bad because he can be so sweet and only sometimes he wants to cyber…I will try to delete him…

Yes. turns out he is waay too premature… I’ve know him for two years then hung out for two weeks, i broke up on the first day and talk him into it so that we spend time together as friends so that it wouldn’t go horribly. i never want go on online dating again… EVER..
i like to have my life to go other way around and not having someone dragging my feet.

@disturbed_broken, it is normal for people in abusive relationships to feel crappy and worthless about themselves. That is what makes abusive relationships so bad—they leave scars.

I am sure part of the reason you feel bad is because you have empathy, because you are a good person. But that doesn’t mean you should let yourself get tricked. There is no reason for you to feel bad because his “sweet” personality is just a mask he wears to manipulate you. You can’t hurt a mask.

@disturbed_broken You’re not worthless, you’re not disgusting, and no one deserves this.

@avvooooooo the thing is I’ve dealt with someone in real life like this my whole life and just told someone about it recently so on the internet it seems more harmless…I blocked him and I’m tempted to unblock him but I haven’t yet.

This guy is a predator and a criminal just for what he has already done with you.

Avoid any further contact with him. If he keeps after you, the police must get involved to protect you and stop him. If he is not stopped he will keep after you girls and he will harm them in ways from which they might never recover!

@disturbed_broken Just because you’ve dealt with it before doesn’t mean that you have to deal with it ever again. And just because its on the internet doesn’t mean its harmless. Block him and if he contacts you some other way, you’re going to have to find a way to protect yourself from him. This includes calling the police. If you do have to call the police, you’re not just doing it for yourself. You’re doing it for the several other underage girls he’s probably chatting up right now and/or will chat up in the future.

If you have the feeling to unblock him again just read this thread over and over again.

He is nasty, a bad person, a pervert, not the person he claims to be, is using you, is probably talking to other girls like you, and just plain bad for you.

Please take everyone’s advice and stay away. He is sick and does not care for you.

Just saying

@disturbed_broken This guy is a classic predator. He knows that you are emotionally vulnerable. He is using you; if you were to send him pictures of the kind he sent you, he would use them to blackmail you into doing even worse things. He has already violated at least two laws by sending you that stuff and asking you to do the same. This guy is dangerous to you and other girls. Please, shut him off and forget about him. Better yet, contact the police and help them put this creep where he belongs, in a cell.

BLOCK. HIM. NOW. And leave him blocked.

Please, take this to the police. It will be difficult and yet, you may help to save some other young girl. As well, please seek some therapy. It sounds as though you’ve had some serious trauma in your life that you need to work through. Take care.

@disturbed_broken I have dealt with a guy like this before.

I met him online on an online poker site. He seemed fine and we started talking on the phone. I would block him if I were you, not call the police because snitching in my book sucks. Unless he has made physical threats to you. This guy I met was really nice at first, then he got to the point of “threatening to kill himself” if I did whatever he didn’t want me to do. That is the sign of control and the main problem I have seen here. Right now it will seem fine, then if you meet with him and date him he will slowly start to take your friends away but do it in such a subtle way that you don’t even realize what he is doing. My guess is right now whenever you say something he doesn’t like or tell him he scares you he gets really sad and ” oh I would never do anything to you baby ” or things of that sort. Or the opposite, where he acts so hurt that he is angry and just so upset that you could ever think that of him.

Not that online dating is a bad thing, or dating a 20 year old, or him sending you pictures (if you wanted them). The issue here is he sounds like he is manipulative by threatening to kill himself if you block him, he wants you to feel sorry for him and stay in contact so he can slowly get control of your mind.

I went through this, and it was a horrible experience. I was 17 at the time and this guy used that to manipulate me. Trust me you are not stupid, you are confused because on one hand at times he seems so sweet and tells you so many nice things. One my ex used was ” you are the most beautiful girl in the world, now many guys will say this to you to tell you what you want to hear, I say this because your outside beauty and your inside beauty together makes you the most beautiful girl in the world” On the other hand though you have a weird feeling about him because he gets “hurt” so easily and will talk to you about his feelings for a long time until you give in usually.

Do yourself a favor, break away before it is too late. You don’t want to let him get you into the state of mind he is aiming for. IT sucks

@disturbed_broken The great thing about the internet is that you can shut someone off and they can’t do anything to you. So, block this guy. If he kills himself (which he won’t) you won’t know anything about it. He is a predator—do you know what that means? It means he is looking for young girls to scare and mess with. If you are frightened, go to a trusted adult or the police.

I’m sure this isn’t what you want to hear, but an internet relationship between a 15 year old girl, and a 20 year old guy, is kind of creepy.
I’m assuming you don’t even live in the same state. How can you have a relationship with someone, only, over the internet?
Where is he going to take you on a date? (I can’t think of anything funny)