For those in long-term relationships how do you handle the occassional crush?

I go and visit Mrs Palm and her five daughters.

A few crush questions today. Interesting.

I’ve been there before (had the crush whilst in a long term relationship). For me, though, it was an innocent crush. I had no intention of doing anything about it. The person that I crushed on—I just thought that they were awesome. I still loved my partner, though, very, very much.

I don’t know what else to say..

I acknowledge them and then move on. I don’t lead them on because what’s the point? I’m not going to do anything and I wouldn’t want to do anything with someone who would make a move on a person who’s in a committed relationship.

There is a reason I chose my husband.

I find various women attractive, sometimes unusually so, but basically I just put them out of my mind. I find that full blown crushes do not happen on their own, they require you to think about the object of desire. If you don’t think about them, then no crush develops.

I don’t need to handle them because I don’t get them. I’ve had a 19 year crush on my husband. Long term relationships are better than a tiny little crush. at least for me

Well… If you were to ask my ex, she would say, go for them both until one of them makes you mad… then drop that one.

I myself might flirt a little but it’s all meant as harmless. I don’t ever have intensions to cheat on anyone. If I wanted to be with someone other than the person I’m with at the time, I’d simply end the current relationship move along until I found someone that I did want to be with. In my opinion, if you enjoy being with the person you are with, then little “crushes” and whatnot are of no importance.

It’s fine to window shop as long as you’re not buying

The same as @Snarp. In a few instances, I did let a real crush develop, but my deep love and respect for my wife easily won out and I never considered actually acting on my feelings. I have found that the crushes fade pretty quickly.

You crush it.

Fantasize about them while having sex with your SO? Is that wrong? If I love someone usually I can’t see anybody else, but the one I love. There has been a time when I had such a crush and feelings for someone else that I knew that the person I was with was not the man I should be with because I shouldn’t be having as strong of feeling for someone else as I did. That was worded horribly I apologize

I never got them, even on long deployments. My love for Milady Meghan was so strong as to block out even the most blantant come-ons (not that there were many, I’m not exactly Robert Redford). We had a strong mutually-dependant relationship. Maybe too strong, as her death has left me a hollow useless-feeling shell.

This is an easy answer…
BEAT OFF, and get over it.

There are times I will encounter a woman that I want to have be a part of my life and say “Hi” and then arrage a meeting with the Wife so we can go to the next step. the Wife and i are in a open relationship.

I think innocent crushes are normal and healthy. If you pursue it or develop and inappropriate relationship with the person, then that’s cheating.

I handle it by recognizing it, and of course my husband can tell. He’s not stupid. At least I don’t deny it like him. It bothers me when I can tell he likes certain women more than others, and he just completely denies it..but treats them very differently and talks about them differently. I think he fails to realize that even though we haven’t been married a very long time…I still know him quite well. Shh, he doesn’t seem to know that.

We have an open relationship so this is a total non-issue. Crushes are inevitable and I don’t see any special value in monogamy.

I never really had a crush when dating someone. I lost feelings for someone as I gained feelings for someone else at the same time. Also second guessed a relationship or two and had moments of weakness (none of which went unpunished). But I can’t say I developed a crush on someone while dating someone else. The only crush I had was with them.

It hasn’t happened. If it did then there is only one thing i could do. I would have to tell my girlfriend about it and hope she didn’t freak out too much. then i would try to put distance between me and the crush if possible. At least until those feelings went away.

I can’t even imagine such a thing. I view all other people as possible friends, acquaintances and people in the neighborhood. I do not have romantic feelings for any other.

Such crushes are rare. And generally short-lived, perhaps only a day. Not to mention, I find cheating to be just about the most abhorrent thing you can do in a relationship.

It happens sometimes… but I always think about how much I love him and how great he is to me…. It helps to imagine that the person I have a “crush” on would treat me badly if we were ever to be together lol

Cheaters don’t deserve relationship.

My attention is for my partner… and them alone…. I have no crushes at all when I’m with some one

Being attracted to other people while in a steady relationship or married is normal. Whether or not you actually act on those feelings is another story. I don’t think anyone on here will actually admit they did anything with their crushes while in a relationship with someone else.