How much do you change when writing fiction based on real life?

As much or as little as you want. You’re got. It’s your story.

People who know you will always wonder if they appear in your story. The only thing you can do is to throw a little doubt in by embellishing a bit. They’ll still wonder, though. So if you’re afraid of what people you know will think, you’ll have to stop writing fiction or memoir.

Now, sometimes people take two people they know and kind of mash them together, or they take themselves and they spread their own character out around several fictional characters. Sometimes they leave things the same, but change circumstances. You say it’s character driven, so try putting them in some other situation to see what they do.

In the end, though, depending on your theory of writing, I think you have to abandon your control and let the characters dictate the action. You might be surprised at what turns up. They may have an interest in not being found out, too.

I just change whatever I need to do to make the story work. I write about people I know, and it’s obvious who it is, but to hell with them, it makes the story that much better, and the characters that much easier to understand.

I’d say: get it out first. If you have a story or an experience that is so compelling that you feel the need to get it out, write it first. (You don’t have to show it to anyone).

During the process something might happen. Your real life references might become characters with their own life. Or they may remain who they are and so when you are done you have to make decisions whether to use pseudonyms and different places and etc, etc.

But I would say, get it out first. If you are worried about what others will think and is this disguised enough, etc, it’ll inhibit your writing. So take the plunge, judge later. The muse is fickle enough as she is.

Believe it or not, other people likely do not see themselves anywhere close to the same way you see them.

That cute guy in your gym class isn’t doesn’t see the shining Adonis you see on the basketball court when he looks in the mirror. You could write exactly what you think happened, and they might not even remember the same events happened, much less that the story is about them.

Just write what you feel, and change the names to protect the (not so) innocent. I do like the idea of changing obvious similarities, like hair colour and favourite foods. That is often enough to convince someone it’s not them.

Go ahead and write it as close to their character traits as you want. Then, DENY, DENY, and DENY. That’s what the “This is a work of fiction. Any similarity or likeness to any events or persons living or dead is purely coincidental.” line is for. Although, eventually you’ll get cornered, and you’ll do something stupid; like admit it. So what. That goes with the job. There isn’t a serious fiction writer anywhere that didn’t have to apologize to someone. Stop worrying, and just write how YOU think it should be, not in a way to avoid stepping on anyone’s feelings.
-Dan