My little sister (who's 9) can't seem to find her "thing". You know, a hobby...a favorite thing to do. What should I tell her?

Thank you for clarifying what you meant by “thing”.

This is the age that people start to figure it out. I had one kid who was academic and then took on theater, another who did Civil Air Patrol and Forensics, and another who did music and theater. She has to find her passion and then be encouraged to follow it. Is she in Scouts or Campfire? That could be a start, at least to get introduced to stuff. I developed a passion for politics in Campfire Girls.

She does have a “thing”, she just hasn’t discovered what it is yet. It sounds like handicrafts doesn’t interest her much, or maybe she’s too young yet to have much patience. Has she tried music? Cooking? Growing flowers? Looking after a pet?

Tell her she’s lucky because since she hasn’t found her ‘thing’, that means she gets to try out all of them.

@Judi She isn’t in Scouts or anything like that. I tried to do 4-H last year but my mom really didn’t want me to so I don’t think she’s gonna let my sister.
@downtide We both do piano but she wants to try the flute but our parents want us to do piano first. She likes to cook but really can’t do it that often because she always has to help from our mom. We had a hamster a few years ago but it got out of its cage a lot so we really don’t want a hamster again, and we can’t have a cat because my mom and I are allergic and we already have one dog who would never let another one in the house.

Buy her some interesting books or take her for shopping. She’ll happy about that.
She must first discover her own hobby.

“Here’s an article about helping kids discover their true calling.

She may be the one that enjoys sports. If she’s not into hand made stuff than its possible she doesn’t like to sit still and needs a sport to blow off her energy.
It could be possible she may like wood working. My daughter did. If she tends to be on the creative side she may like art or doing sculpting. Maybe even a martial arts class.
A lot will depend if she likes to compete. She is just 9 so she has plenty of time to discover her passions. Most of the time you just happen upon them by accident. Some people will never decide. I like so many things and I will dwell on them for a while and then get bored and move on. Her thing may be that she just likes to experiment, learn about something new and then move on to the next experience. Its ok if she never settles on one thing. Her thing may be just the passion to learn.

@Pandora You have a point – she might like sports. But if that’s true, she would get teased for a while by my parents and our brother. I’d try not to, but that’s just how our family is. It was huge that we were watching the Vikings/Saints game a few days ago. She would hate it if she can’t find her thing, because everybody in my family is always doing something they really enjoy, but she doesn’t have anything. I feel like I should help her because I was having the same problem not too long ago.
@Judi That article is more about highschool kids, not 9yos.

Well….. Buy her something little kids like like a….. coloring book, kids always love something to color… i think.

@ChocolateReigns

Perhaps a trip to the library is in order? The two of you could take a walk through the non-fiction section, and look at all the myriad books on different hobbies. Most libraries let you check out 20 books or more at a time, so she can grab a book on anything that catches her eye, and page through them later.

In one trip, she could look at everything from tarot cards to interior decorating, to t-shirt surgery, to poetry, to calligraphy…

She is young to find her “thing”. Tell her there is plenty of time, and she should just keep trying different activities.

She’s at the age of being a dabbler. At 9, most of your motor skills have just progressed to the point of where, with practice and repetition, she will become good at the things she attempts. The problem is, at 9, you expect to be good at something the first time you try it.

I would suggest looking for a cross stitch sampler for her to work, one that is stamped onto fabric. 9 is the age when historically girls worked samplers. Is she interested in American Girl dolls or something similar? Another way to get started on crafts is to make things for your dolls. Working on doll-sized project would be fun for her, and the project size is manageable.

@marinelife I am trying so hard not to say that. I know it’s probably true, and that it might take years to find her thing, but kids love to be taken seriously. I know it’s true because I was and am still sometimes there not too long ago. I think it’s my duty to be a good older sister and think about how I really didn’t have an older sister when I was her age. She needs me to help her find something.

@Seek_Kolinahr That is SUCH a good idea! I’ll see if I can do that tomorrow or the next day. Thank you!

@PandoraBoxx She has an American Girl doll and she loves it! She would love to make some jewelry for her doll. I think I’ll offer to help her do that sometime soon.
My mom taught me to do embroidery when I was about 8 or 9, and I actually made a sampler. She’ll be doing that with my sister soon.

There are all kinds of “doll size” things that are fun to do at that age – making a braided rug, making a quilt, making jewelry, making food out of fimo dough, making an apron for the doll, decorating a t-shirt, knitting the doll a scarf, valentine crafts, decoupage a box to store small things in, etc. You get the idea.

what about dance classes? like hip hop or something. I love music and dancing it might work for your sister, you never know.

@bitter_sweet_rose That’s another thing that I tried to do when I was younger that my mom said no to. I tried gymnastics too. My mom said no to all of it. But there’s tons of other stuff.

Sounds like your mom is discouraging things that require ongoing fees, and driving to classes.

ice skating…dance…science camp…building giant things out of Legos