Where can I find that thing I'm looking for?

It always feels like something is missing. No matter what I do or where I go or who I’m with, something is missing. It’s as if when they handed out the “who you are” baskets, mine was one apple short.

Looked at the other way around, I got an extra dose of nothingness. Makes me relate comfortably to questions about existential angst and suicide and the meaning of life. Or to those mental illness questions.

I don’t even know what it is that I’m missing. I just know that it’s not there, and most other people seem to have it. For a long time, I thought it was love, or that love was a good substitute. But it is only temporary and most people seem to have a much more substantial version of the thing.

I’m sure the answer is completely obvious to most people. But maybe you could explain it in baby words. I may be smart, but this is one thing I do not understand. Maybe I’m incapable of understanding until I find it.