How do you handle it when a friend requests your time?

Drop everything – they know this about me. My house is always open to them at any time of the night. They can stay here indefinitely.

Friends only really come to me with certain types of problems…. however they know, without having to ask, that if it’s humanly possible to resolve then I’ll do it.

Of course if it is serious trouble I will drop everything…

It depends. If I have the time then I’ll chat right then. If I’m in the middle of something that can’t wait- then I set up a time to talk to them later.

It also depends on what’s wrong. If they are just having a bad day- then I try to meet them later to vent and laugh it off. If they are suicidal- then it must be dealt with immediately. Even having them accompany me with what I need to get done.

It also depends on whether they constantly have an issue or ‘crisis’.

@Simone_De_Beauvoir -You rock! :))

@The Joker-You sound like a good friend to your friends :)

@Cruiser-Serious to you or serious to them??

If any friend tells me the three magic words, “I need you”, I drop everything. Work, teaching, vacation, gym, whatever. Nothing is more important than a friend in need.

@gemiwing -Sounds fair enough:)

@lucillelucillelucille…. I hold my friends very dearly. Over the years they’ve become my substitute family.

@MrItty -That’s exactly how I try to be with the ones I love :)

@lucillelucillelucille serious to them of course! Most of my friends…all 2 of them…know me well enough that if they need my time they will just ask for it…that is what friends are for!

If it is really important, like their loved one close to death, I would drop everything. But I also have a friend for whom everything is really important. That friend has learned to wait.

Small talk- I have to be in the mood or have time for.
Petty problems- I don’t get too involved, give my two cents.
Real problems- I will spend the night with you, hold you, wipe your tears away, drive miles and miles, even kick somebody’s fucking ass, most of all listen.

@onesecondregrets -I like your approach :)

I don’t have so many friends but the ones I do have I cherish. I’d drop everything if humanly possible. I can see where this could cause a conflict sometimes, as I have many demands on my time. I work two jobs and go to school online. Three jobs if you count the online thing. I’ve never had to choose between a friend’s emergency and say, missing an online seminar.

I am very open, love making friends. My definition of friendship allows for – many best friends. I have over 10 really close friends, and many fairly close, countless close enough friends and contacts that could be friends given the time and opportunity.

I am myself’s best friend before I’m anyone else’s. Reasons for which I would change that priority must be grave. Generally depends on what this time will be about. If it’s a problem, it depends on what it is. I’ll give concise and targeted advice over media that allow me to multi task and pursuit my own goals at the same time.
Hanging out, I’ll make a date for it. I live by my calendar. It has clearly marked availability – so I just make time for face-time.
As mentioned above, I don’t care much for small talk, but my friends already know that – they have other friends to take care of their small talk needs – they come to me for the “good stuff”.

Helping people with complex problems is also helpful to me, giving me experience – and motivation to solve them (I love helping others). As a by-product, I learn more.

I value my friends, maybe in a slightly different way. When I hang out with someone, I tend to be more intense and invoke what you would say, quality time. Lots of thoughts shared, ideas, discussions – maybe that’s one way I can have so many close friends without keeping up with them on a daily or even monthly basis.

Fun question lucille, thanks :)

@Trillian -I value my friendships more than anything and if all it takes is alittle time to make someone feel better,I will go through hell and highwater to do it :))

@phoebusg -Great answer as usual :)

1.Yes
2.Yes
3.Yes
4. Depends on the “friend.”

I always (even for my employees) try to drop everything if they need me.
If I can.

And, family is above all things.

@ChazMaz -I figured you to be that way!It’s nice to know there are still people who are like that:)

Would drop everything for a “true friend” without any explanation from them.

@BoBo1946 -In a heartbeat :)

@lucillelucillelucille yes we would….been down that road before and hope to go down it many more times!

Depends on the friend, I don’t waste much time on them but then again I don’t have hardly any to worry about.

@Steve_A considering your friends a “waste of time” and not having many friends are not likely coincidences

@MrItty You are right about this.

The word “friend” is such a loose term to me. I am talking about close friends I’ve known for a long time thats different.I have only a few of those.

Outside of my professional work, the only person in my personal life who wants my advice is my wife, and really, she wants to have me agree with her decision. So, do I drop everything for her? You bet I do! I know which side my bread is buttered on!

There isn’t many people in th world i would drop everthing for, so it definetly depends on the freind for me. Unless they are trying to kill them selves

@wundayatta -Smart man !:)

@life_after_2012 -So you are for them ‘til the end?;))

yes i am.

I would always be there for my friends in an instant.

My time is their time, however long it takes, and I know (or at least hope) they would be there for me.

@partyparty -I feel the same way :)

Well, I often try my best to think about their problems,but when I ‘m busy,I will go round to it later.I don’t want to let them down,they trust me,that’s why they turn to me for help.Words may be little,but your care will give them many comfort somehow.