Interesting question. Winning only makes sense when it is a zero sum game. I.e., there can only be one person who wins, such as in an election.
The problem is that people take this zero-sum game mentality and try to apply it all over the place. In fact, there are very few zero sum games. I guess the most important one is whether you pass your genes on or not. There can only be one male who does that.
However, when you look at all females of a species, then there are many opportunities, and so if you don’t get one particular female pregnant, there are opportunities to get many others pregnant.
Winning, then, is largely a social construct. It is relative to a cultural frame of reference. If it’s a game—an artificial situation, then we can declare winners and loser. But as I said, we try to apply those terms to other things, and it doesn’t really work. Remember Iran? Where the US won the war but lost the peace?
The real issue is whether you achieve your objectives or not. However, “objective” is a very squishy term and it can be easy to fudge things one way or another to say you reached it or not. Bush stood on the deck of an aircraft carrier to tell everyone the US had won.
Winning and losing are psychological concepts, then. They are what we say when we do or don’t meet our objectives.
@Shae That has not been my experience. I spent a couple of years trying to convince people I was a failure, and I lost that battle.
@Snarp Of course I disagree with you, for reasons explained above. There are really very few situations in life where you “have to” lose.