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wundayatta's avatar

What specific behaviors make you uniquely lovable? How did you learn to be that way?

Asked by wundayatta (58741points) February 18th, 2010

Did it come naturally, or did you have to work at it? If you had to work at it, what was the work you did?

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18 Answers

gailcalled's avatar

Well, as I have already said, I took Milo to vet’s for an enema today. That was both y out of love, and out of fear of my daughter. It turned out to be very much like a changing a baby’s poopy diapers. I’m still wiping off parts of his fur. (And the carrier when we arrived home!)

I fell in love with my babies as soon as I felt the first fluttery kicks during my pregnancies. There was no analysis, no thinking, no work involved. The love just was, and still is.

TexasDude's avatar

I’m slightly awkward in person, but still try to be a gentlemen, and many women have told me that I am very endearing because of it. I have no idea how I got that way.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

They say I have a great genuine smile – so I guess I really mean it when I smile at someone.

chyna's avatar

I am nice to everyone I meet and listen to their stories.

Likeradar's avatar

I take myself seriously, but feel free to laugh when I inevitably screw up somehow. I grew up with parents who are the same way.

uniquely lovable? Not so much.

@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard Awkwardness can be freggin adorable. :)

susanc's avatar

@Augustlan told me recently that I have a certain something she can’t quite put her finger on.
That must be it, I guess.

gailcalled's avatar

@susanc:Women with that certain something should show their friends exactly where to place the finger.

tinyfaery's avatar

I don’t have a big enough ego to answer this question. I’m not uniquely lovable in anyway. I feel lucky to be loved.

evandad's avatar

I’m the patriarch of the family. I got there by getting old.

YARNLADY's avatar

I am kind, generous, patient and happy. The first two came from my up bringing, and the last two were developed over time.

Berserker's avatar

There’s nothing lovable about me. When I exhale, flowers die, and water stagnates when I look at it.

I like hugging pillows though. But I don’t think people find it cute or adorable, then just look at me all weird and back away. Oh well fuckem.

Snuggles pillow WEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Jeruba's avatar

Yikes! I have no idea. I’m not sure I am. Some people love me, but I’m damned if I know why. A therapist once told me I was “incredibly likable,” and I simply didn’t know how to parse that. I guess I love people for reasons that are no better and no worse than the things they love me for, but I don’t think I’d know how to subject them to rational analysis.

Just_Justine's avatar

Nah! I don’t think I have any. I am not a very lovable person.

Sophief's avatar

I never thought I could love. My past boyfriends especially my last I was a really horrible evil bitch to him. I was definately not lovable. I hated myself for the way I was, I tried to change but it seemed I just didn’t have it in me. Then I mey my s/o and I changed just like that. I worship the ground he walks on. I am a much better person. I tell him how I used to be and he can’t imagine I was like that.

jonsblond's avatar

I’ve been told that you can see it in my eyes. I’m just one of those kind, sweet girls. I guess you could say the lovable girl next door, but get to know me and you’ll see a bit of a wild side too. I didn’t learn to be this way. I just am.

wundayatta's avatar

It’s strange to me, but it seems that my efforts to speak honestly and “tell it like it is” makes me lovable. My efforts to be a good person contribute to my lovability (insofar as I have any), as well.

I’ve challenged my self throughout my life to speak as truthfully as I can; to not be afraid to be who I am; to not try to be what I think people will like. I learned this by making many mistakes and being deeply lonely as a teenager—something that rears its ugly head on occasion even now that I am much older.

Jeruba's avatar

If you asked this question in general, though, and not in the second person, I would refer to literature and film and share this observation: what typically makes even a seemingly unlovable character sympathetic to the audience is that he or she loves. In loving something or someone (usually but not always a person—sometimes a place or a symbol or an abstract ideal), the character shows his or her humanity and thus appeals to us. The grizzled old curmudgeon who adores the little girl (or the horse or the dog) or the rough, hard character who gives his all for his love of justice or even the cruel queen who loves her land always ends up winning our hearts to some degree. This seems to illustrate the wisdom that to be loved one must give love. It does not necessarily mean that one will be loved by the person that one loves, which is how this saying is often misunderstood.

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