Are you for bringing back the cane in schools?

I’m in favor of parents taking responsibility for their kids. The belief that teachers are somehow responsible for instilling values, morals, manners, and a work ethic into kids is egregious.

They should also stop blaming television, music videos, movies, video games, facebook, and any other target parents find to excuse the outrageous behavior of their little monsters. Monitor what they watch and play, hold them responsible for homework and chores, and stop buying frickin children frickin cell phones. Stop dropping them off at malls and movie theaters as de facto babysitters. Know who they hang out with and where they are.

You’ve chosen to reproduce – take responsibility for turning your kids into viable adults.

(I say all of this as an adult who has made a conscious decision not to reproduce. While I will never claim that my childhood was anything close to perfect, I can tell you that my parents took part in my upbringing, unlike a lot of what I see around me today.)

Nah just threaten to take away their cell phones and kids settle down in a hurry.

considering some schools have kids that bring guns to school? um, not likely.

Hell no
Nobody can touch my kids like that. Ever.

This is a new age, just try to beat someone’s kid without causing an uproar lol….....

This way of thinking is very outdated, you can’t just beat the shit out of something or someone to make it work…...You can give a more gentle physical discipline, but that’s not the teachers job.

Not for kids.Just for people that have more than 10 items in the express line at the grocery store…but that’s it!! ;)

No. If we are trying to raise children to be considerate, kind, gentle members of society nobody should be hurting them.

Only if it is to help the infirmed or the elderly. One mark gets put on my kids, and somebody is going to pay through the nose. Leave the discipline to ME. I will handle it.

No. But I’m sure Taser could come up with something helpful.

Even if I found it acceptable to spank my kids, I would be livid if someone else did it.

I think @syz has it best, that parents need to be responsible. If the parents don’t teach the kids about personal responsibility, the kids are going to learn it at school.

@Likeradar
Parents hit their kids and they can still grown up to be good members of society.

Yep!

I’m only asking this as a study found less than ¼ of parents ever punish their kids and see their kids as friends.

Can you provide a link to this study please?

@MissAusten
It was on the Wright stuff, I’ll look for the study.

Parents cannot be an authority figure and a friend to their kid.

Beating children is a great way to teach them that physical violence is ok and gets people to do what you want them to do.

@holden
Like war?

Absolutely not. In no way do I think hitting a child teaches them anything good, no matter who does it. And if someone else hit my child, I’d kick their ass.

@augustlan OK…but what about those parents who are fine with reasonable spankings. If the parent says, in advance, say at the beginning of the school year, “If that’s what it takes, then do it,” should it be allowed under those circumstances if the principal felt it was necessary, and nothing else had worked to correct the behavior?

When my kids were in elementary school I told them “I’ve given the principal permission to spank you if you get in trouble!” They sighed and said, very patiently, “We don’t ever get sent to the principal’s office.” They never did, either.

Absolutely! My students always behave better after tempting them with candy canes.

@Val123

My kids respected the Slanted Eye of their father more than they feared the wafting wand of the Principle.

And if I allowed another adult to lay a hand on them then they would loose respect for the Slanted Eye of their father

@RealEyesRealizeRealLies My kid’s dad left the state when they were in preschool and for all intents and purposes, they never saw him again. I needed all the help I could get from wherever I could get it, short of having “some guy” or a succession of guys, move in with me, which never happened. I wasn’t that kind of Mom.

@Val123 I wonder how many teachers would be ok with hitting a child.

I’ll be teaching in about a year, and there is no fucking way I would ever hit someone else’s child. I don’t care if I have their permission.

@Likeradar I think it’s one of those southern traditions. Teachers probably still do that to kids in some small southern town or something, or a secluded religious school. But yes, no teacher would even want to hit a kid anyways.

@Val123 No way. If I believed in corporal punishment, I would never, ever allow someone else to mete it out. It would be by my hand or not at all.

@Val123

It’s tough being a single mom. Might be the toughest thing in the entire world. It’s probably ten times tougher than the toughest thing in the entire universe. And there is absolutely nothing more important than raising children.

You do/did the best you can/could. That’s all anyone can ever ask. We’ll make mistakes together along the way. We’ll share the fruits of your labor together too.

Great job Mom! The Best

No. All that teaches is that big people can beat up little people. I do endorse teachers being allowed to use physical force in self-defense though.

No. That comes from a primitive and ignorant mentality, and only breeds Nazis and KKK members in the long run, haha.

What we need is for people to understand, and not fear.

If my teacher beat me with a cane I’d disarm her, smack her with it and lead a uprising in my classroom.

yeah no way… that’d just make you a complete douchebag the era of beating students is long gone my friend

No, absolutely not. That is the job of the parents only. I agree with @Vunessuh and my parents would as well.

@syz

Parents cannot be an authority figure and a friend to their kid.

I disagree. Speak for yourself. My mom was a friend to me. We had friendly conversations, we had common interests and did things together (I did with my dad as well, I was just closer to my mom) and yet both parents were authority figures.

No. It is too easy for corporal punishment (as a means of discipline) to be abused.

I spent some of my grade school years in Mississippi, which still practices corporal punishment, as do 20 other states: http://www.stophitting.com/index.php?page=statesbanning. I had undiagnosed ADHD and was continually being punished for being disruptive. One of my teachers drilled holes in her paddle in order to have less wind resistance. Other forms of public humiliation were also used.

It created in me a deep aversion towards education, leadership, and myself. School became a place of fear. It shut down my ability to learn. It took a long time to restore my love of learning.

So, no, I don’t think states should adopt this practice. I also think it needs to be removed from states that do.

I also believe corporal punishment does not diminish the behaviors that are being punished. In fact, it can exacerbate it. It becomes a practice to be out witted. There are far more effective interventions.

I agree with @syz. That said, I also believe that some form of discipline needs to be enforced. If a kid continually disrupts a class with that arrogant attitude of “You can’t do anything about it!” I find it infuriating. I think a parent should be called to the school immediately or the child should be removed from the room. It is not fair to the rest of the class.
I don’t want my kids getting hit by anyone, but I also don’t want them running roughshod over the teachers. If my kids acted the way I’ve seen some of these kids act I would be mortified.

I remember once, at my private grade K-3 school, seeing a teacher discipline an unruly kindergartner by tying him to his chair with rope. I believe it got the point across, and no paddle was necessary.

My first grade teacher actually glued a girl to her chair. Poured out a big pool of Elmer’s and made the girl sit down in it.

It was humiliating for her. I wonder if she thinks about it today.

By all means, let’s have fully grown adults using their greater size and strength, combined with brute force and a blunt instrument to inflict physical pain on children in order to intimidate them into reacting out of fear. I’m certain they will immediately learn that if they misbehave in any way, there will be pain, and it will never occur to any of them that they too can manipulate people smaller and weaker than they are by hurting them. Capital idea.

I agree with @syz 100%. I do think that teachers should have more power when it comes to disciplining disruptive kids, it seems that kids have more power over the teachers nowadays like @Trillian said, kids often know tht teachers can’t do anything about their disruptive behaviour which must be infuriating for the teacher and the kids who want to learn, but I don’t think bringing back the cane is the answer.

No. I do think we’re sometimes too lineant, and that there should be some stricter rules imposed. But I remember the cane, and it didn’t work. We had a sadistic headmaster who is rotting in hell now. He did not make any of us a better person. Just abused the rule.

I think children do need some guidance and rules, which above all must be a result of co-operation between teachers and parents. I think our biggest problem today is bad parenting. A simple threat like “I’ll tell your dad” or “I’ll give you a bad mark” used to do the trick in the past. But dads don’t come to ask about their sons anymore (if they even remember they have a son), and mothers are too busy watching TV to read their kids’ reports.

There IS caning in some schools.

Teacher strikes my child, I draw and quarter teacher. No I’m highly opposed. When I was kid corporal punishment was the norm. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen some abusive freak “disciplining” a child at the school. Once saw a boy getting his butt blistered by the sweaty principal, the boy had his pants down around his ankles. Why? Saw a principle strike a child with a length of pvc pipe.Why? Saw a teacher tackle and slap a child for talking back. No I“ll punish my own children because I want well behaved children not because it gets some freak off.

More and more teachers each year are beaten up by pupils. I student in my old school grabbed a teacher by the neck and pinned him to the wall and nothing happened to that kid at all. If they took him out of school the parents would have complained.

@augustlan I wasn’t asking if you would allow it. It was a hypothetical question. If there is a parent who is OK with swats (not to be confused with “beating a kid up”) and gave the principal (not to be confused with a teacher who might act in a moment of intense frustration) permission to employ that discipline if necessary, do you think it would be OK?

@RealEyesRealizeRealLies Thank you. (((hugs))) It really was tough at times.

They would learn less. There’s tons of neuroscientific evidence for this.

@mattbrowne If a kid is acting up in such a way they they need to be sent to the office for discipline, then I can tell you that what is actually happening until then is the other kids in the class are learning less, because the “bad kid” is distracting them, disrupting the class, demanding the teacher’s attention.

@Val123 Hrm. That’s a bit trickier. I guess if that’s what that parent wants, who am I to stop them? But, if I were the principal, there’s no way I would ever agree to that.

@Val123 – We have to deal with kids acting up. Absolutely. But we should not threaten all students with a cane.

@Val123 How distracting do you think it would be for all students if they knew they could be physically harmed (and possibly very humiliated depending on where the punishment takes place) if they acted up?
Yes, I agree that corporal punishment can scare children into changing their behavior, but it’s not worth it.

Absolutely, kids don’t have enough discipline at all. Parents are scared to hit them, and they cause enough trouble at school. When I was at school I probably wouldn’t of liked it, but it wouldn’t of done me any harm. Kids get away with far too much. A quick hit with a cane and they wouldn’t do it again!

@mattbrowne What do you mean threaten “all” kids with a swat? You wouldn’t do that anymore than you threaten “all” kids with detention or suspension or expulsion if they break certain rules, like carrying weapons into school. They know what could happen, and that’s as far as you get with actual “threatening.”

@Dibley Why do you say parents are “scared” to hit their children? I think it’s much more likely that parents are choosing to not use violence against those they love.

I can’t speak for all parents, but I’m not scared to spank mine. Spanking is not illegal, and there are plenty of parents who still do it. My husband and I choose not to hit our kids in any way because we think there are better ways to discipline.

I know a lot of people with kids. Most of the kids are just normal kids who sometimes screw up or do stupid things. Some of them are spanked, and some are not. The absolutely worst behaved kids I know (relatives of ours) are spanked. They are still terrors. Not because they are spanked, but because their parents are clueless and inconsistent. They might spank a kid for doing something once, but the next twenty times the kid misbehaves, there are no consequences at all. My kids aren’t perfect, but they are manageable and don’t get into trouble at school. I can take them out into public without incident. They are not easy kids—they’re all stubborn, type A, outgoing, intelligent, stubborn, determined, stubborn…and yet, we don’t have to resort to physical punishment to teach them right from wrong. That’s just our choice.

Being spanked didn’t ruin me or my husband, or the vast majority of people I know who were spanked or even slapped. My dad used his belt when we were really in trouble, and all that taught us was to run, hide, or lie like hell when we’d done something wrong. Spanking or not spanking isn’t the determining factor in parenting, and trying to solve all of today’s problems by saying children should be spanked or hit is simplistic.

@MissAusten Excellent.

@Likeradar I don’t mean to beat them! I mean a slap on the legs or something like that, but kids these days get nothing and that isn’t showing them right from wrong. Spanking is illegal in this country.

@Dibley You’re in the UK right? So am I. I didn’t realise that spanking was illegal here. I knew it was frowned upon and they were trying to make it illegal but I didn’t realise that it had actually happened. I was spanked as a kid if I was naughty and it certainly didn’t traumatise me. I think I was smacked about three times in my whole childhood because I soon realised that it wasn’t fun so it was best to stay out of trouble. I also have a good relationship with my parents now so it hasn’t affected that either. I think it all depends on the kid. Some learn from a smack on the bum or legs and some need another form of discipline.

@Likeradar You must have read my mind. My comment was that I don’t understand why people say ” parents are too scared to hit their kids ”. Why would they be scared, here in the US it is legal and parents are very protected by law to be able to hit their kids. With that and the fact that parents are bigger and intimidating to children, there is no reason to be scared to spank them. The answer is that more and more people these days are realizing that it is wrong to spank and it doesn’t teach anything other than to use violence to stop behavior or get what you want.

To answer the question, hell no. If anyone else including my dad ever hit my children there would be some very big problems. So there is no way in hell I would ever allow any teacher to lay a hand on my kids

@Leanne1986 I was slapped on the legs if I were naughty, and if I carried on she just slapped me harder, I soon learned. If you slap kids here you get social services round, which is completely wrong. You should be able to punish your own children.

@Val123 – What I mean is that in a democracy there’s a monopoly to use force. It’s our police and under exceptional circumstances every citizen (self defense or citizen’s arrest). So to increase discipline teachers can’t use a cane or their fists. If a student attacks a teacher or another student the situation is different. Police should deal with this unless the urgency of the situation requires the teacher to act immediately.

@mattbrowne I never suggested that the teachers use that kind of punishment. My concern there is that they could react badly in the emotion of the moment.

@Dibley So you think that parents should just be able to hit their kids pretty much as much as what they want and not to have to worry about social services, where do you draw the line on what hitting kids is too much ? Like is it okay to leave marks ? I personally don’t see a need to ” draw a line ”, so in my opinion there is never a need to smack children.

@dutchbrossis I don’t know where you are from, but if you look at kids around here, they have no discipline. No manners. They verbally abuse people in the street. Steal. Do drugs. Have kids at 14. All because they don’t know where the line is, they have been able to get away with so much.

@Val123 – Okay, I get your point!

@Dibley So you know for a fact all the kids in your area who are not spanked steal, verbally abuse strangers, do drugs, and get pregnant at 14?

I am willing to bet you anything that there are adolescents in your area who are respectful, do not get pregnant at age 14, and don’t steal and who have parents who have found ways besides pain and fear of physical punishment to raise nice humans.

You’re trying to create causation between two things (spanking and well-behaved kids) that is faulty, at best.

@Likeradar I bet I couldn’t count on one hand all the well behaved kids in this area.

@Dibley That’s besides the point. How do you know the type of discipline the parents of these ill-behaved children use?

@Likeradar From the kids behaviour, they don’t know right from wrong. If they had discipline at home then they wouldn’t behave how they did on the streets.

@Dibley You’re equating discipline solely with spanking. I’m by no means against discipline, but it comes in many forms other than spanking.

You guys….bad parents create bad kids, and whether they spank them or not has nothing to do with it. If a parent is consistent, clear and fair in their expectations AND in their reinforcements, their kids will probably grow up healthy and respectful regardless of what choice of reinforcement they use. Swatting a kid on the butt is NOT = to beating them, any more than aspirin should be included in the “Just say no to drugs” programs, even though aspirin IS a drug.

So all the kids who are well behaved and have been spanked grow up to be respectful and good people ? All the kids who are not spanked are bad behaved abusive people to strangers, drug abusers, and get pregnant at 14 like @Likeradar said ?

I could almost guarantee that most of those poorly behaved kids who don’t know discipline were spanked and their parents expected that to just “teach them”. Well discipline doesn’t mean hit, it means teach. Children can grow up to be very well behaved without spankings just as much as they can with them.

Discipline =/= spanking

@dutchbrossis No. That’s not what I said. I think parents can raise healthy, well adjusted kids without spanking, but parents who spank can also raise, healty, well adjusted kids. The most important thing is the parent’s consistency.

@augustlan Discipline can sometimes = spanking. I was spanked as a kid. I didn’t grow up to think that “violence” is the way to go. I didn’t feel my parents were being abusive. I didn’t suffer any of the things that the no-spankers insist that kids who are spanked will suffer.

@Val123 Same here!

@Val123 I didn’t mean that spanking isn’t a form of discipline, just that they are not interchangeable words. My kids certainly are disciplined, just generally without spanking. FWIW, I was spanked as a kid, too. I didn’t become a mass murderer or anything, either. But, if you can accomplish your disciplinary goals without hitting a child… why wouldn’t you?

Full disclosure, I have spanked two of my children. One for running into the street as a toddler (a quick swat on the butt to grab her attention) and the other because I’d tried everything else and was at my wit’s end. The spanking didn’t work either, so I saw no reason to continue in that vein.

@Val123 Sorry about that, my comment was more directed at dibley. I just forgot the @Dibley

@augustlan 99% of the time, that’s what a “spanking” for my kids entailed. A swat on the butt for doing something life-threatening. I wasn’t spanked a “lot” as a kid. It was one of those, “Wait til your father gets home” kind of things, and the worst part was waiting til my father got home. Well, Father would get home, tired after his day at work, and be given orders to spank us kids. It was always a huge deal: “We shall now talk before I spank you” ordeal, and I hated it. I was 12 before I figured out, his heart wasn’t in it, AND the spankings didn’t hurt. Well, the moment I realized that….it was the last time in my life I got spanked. ‘Cause after The Spanking we had to go to our room until released. That particular evening I stood sullenly in the doorway of my room. When Dad came to release me I snarked “That doesn’t even hurt.” And…that was my last spanking.
It’s all in the drama the consistency. Lashing out violently in anger is wrong. Which is what so many people seem to associate with “spankings.”

@Val123 I think I was spanked only about three times in my whole childhood for two reasons. a) My parents only used it as a last resort and b) I learnt very quickly that certain behaviour would, more than likely, earn me a smacked bum. I didn’t like it all that much so I didn’t break certain rules.

@Leanne1986 That’s about par for the course for me…and for my kids. If they got a spanking it’s because they did something serious, that could have hurt them or someone else. Other than that if you have a crawling 6 month old, how do you teach them not to reach for the outlets other than a slap on the hand? You can’t reason with them…(Yes, I kept the outlets covered up, but I acted as though they weren’t because you just never know.) People seem to want to equate even a slap on the hand with a “beating.” It’s ridiculous.