Whats the worst clanger you've ever dropped?

I was dating a woman that was10 year older then me. We were having a great time. We established a really good “friendship.” With all the benefits. Wink… Wink.

Then I said, we could never develop a real relationship because you are 10 years older then me. And THAT was the end of that.

Insert foot in mouth.

Actually, it was the 8 cats she had.

The worst thing ever, I was working (a hundred) years ago as a receptionist. Our office had a huge front glass window with steps outside. I saw this massive woman walking up them, puffing and panting with effort and turned to my co worker and said “Jeez! she’s huge!” OK, I was 18 and stupid. Of course the lady walked in and of course it was her mother.

I have since grown up (a bit) and probably say less things on impulse (Thank God).

Oh my god, men just don’t think. What happened after that? I can’t think of anything right now, but I’ll have a think.

Welcome to Fluther!

@ChazMaz ah! but now you know better right!

You got that right! I am a fast learner.

@ChazMaz *giggle

Oldest brother deserved a dick punch.

A dick punch? OUCH!

But I guess better then a dick slap.

When i was about 16 years old, i was dating a really nice girl. she asked me to come to Thanksgiving dinner at her uncles house. it was a family affair. i was excited to be asked and was really nervous. we had just sat down to eat. i noticed a low-hanging chandelier above the dinner table and i quietly told myself “be careful of the chandelier”. i am 6 ft 5 inches tall and i had to lean to the right to sit down and avoid the chandelier. at the start of the food serving, i dropped some hot gravy in my lap. it was burning my neverminds and i jumped up to go to the bathroom. WHAMO! my head hit that chandelier and broken glass fell into all of the Thanksgiving dinner. you idiot! me. i was so embarrassed, that i ran to my car and left. i runied the food, i runied Thanksgiving dinner and i ruined my date with a fantastic girl. for a week, i did not have any contact with her. it took me forever to overcome this mess. i apologiezed to everyone, but i never did go back to her uncle’s house.

@john65pennington Poor you, that sounds awful.

@jjmah Hay Caramba…!

@john65pennington What a total nightmare!

I’ve blocked out most of my “foot in mouth” moments but if you contact my grown children they will be happy to recite every one I have had since their birth.

@Judi Hah, you just cant beat abit of family folk-lore :)

@ChazMaz Sorry, but that remark would have pretty much fixed it for me, too. Wow. @john65pennington How embarrassing. LOLLLLL

@jbfletcherfan – Yea, I would feel the same way. That was a long time ago. Now the shoe is on the other foot. :-)

I have called a few boyfriends by the wrong name.“Jackass” was reserved for Jeff…“Jackass Jeff” ;)

@ChazMaz Time changes people. You’ve obviously come to the realization that age does not matter. It’s what’s in people’s personality & in their hearts. You have arrived. :-)

One of the neighbors on the street I lived on as a 5 year old, Mr. S, had a loud cuckoo clock from Germany that could be seen from the outside through the screen door when he had the front door open. One sunny summer afternoon, the clock tolled the hour, and I repeated to him something my aunt had said in private about the clock to her friends, while she, Mr. S and a few other neighbors had been chatting:

“Oh, I know what that clock’s saying!”

What’s it saying?” asked Mr. S, good-naturedly.

“It’s saying ‘Honkies are cuckoo! Honkies are cuckoo!’” I replied with a grin.

“WHO TAUGHT YOU THAT!?” he shrieked.

“Mommy told me! Mom, what’s a honky?”

Mr. S, who was indeed white, turned puce. My aunt (who had bade me call her Mom when I moved in with her) simply grabbed me immediately, took me inside and gave me a good whupping. The two adults never spoke again, though I was made to apologize to him after my thrashing. I don’t know if she ever did, herself.

When I was about 5 years old (the youngest of many children and conceived after a faulty vasectomy), the family was at the dinner table having a lively happy time. Somebody made a joke about my mom being pregnant, and without missing a beat, I chimed in and said, “Oh, I thought you were just fat!” Needless to say, she did not finish her dinner since she left the table to cry in private. :-(

I distinctly remember one foot-in-mouth case that I swiftly avoided.

I was visiting a younger friend who had recently become pregnant (at 16), and we were talking about all the changes she was going through. While I was talking to her my mind was in circles thinking I could never handle that, I’m so glad I avoided teenaged pregancy etc etc. Well she was talking about another friend who had a little girl, saying how the friend could never get her to go to sleep at night. I opened my big mouth (thinking out loud at the time) and almost said “I think I’d just die if I ever got pregnant now” but catching myself in the act managed to tell her “I think I’d just about die if my kid wouldn’t sleep”

I was a teen working in a restaurant and everyone knew a particular co worker had a crush on me and would tease me about it. One day I blurted out, “Oh, he’s a drooly sap!” Very bad since we got to know each other, briefly dated and then someone informed of what I had said one time. Oops, no more dating.

Just a few months I had a really good friendship with a girl but we suddenly stopped even talking to each other.I’m still trying to understand what I did or what has happened but I couldn’t find out but definitely I did something really really stupid to cause such huge and bad rupture

Like @Judi, I’ve blocked most of mine. What came to mind was an occasion in my freshman year in college, when I accidentally insinuated that the girl that I was talking to was ugly (she wasn’t). Totally not my intent; a revision of what I had said (to account for lessons learned) would be to say that girls who invest excessive amounts of time on on their appearance tend to make poor friends.
Mercifully, she seemed to give me the benefit of the doubt. But we haven’t really talked in four years, so maybe not.

My aunt married her husband when she was 8 months pregnant – a fact her daughter didn’t know til I opened my mouth a few years back (the daughter is now 20). I really resented catching hell from my aunt over it, I mean what, she never asked to see pictures of her parents’ wedding? She sucks at math? It never occurred to me they’d lie about it.

@FutureMemory Not exactly like you could have done much in that situation.

@FutureMemory I can sympathize; I know a guy whose father isn’t his biological father, but he – the guy – doesn’t know. It adds an extra edge to discussions about family; I do not want to be the one to set that mess off.

I had a date once, and thinking that I was being sympathetic about her tough day, I said “You look tired”. Oops.
(Truth is though, she really did look tired).