If you could change something about yourself, what would it be?

I would turn off the negative voice in my head
I would stop over-thinking and over-worrying things… I’d get out of my head more (I feel trapped in it!
I would be in better shape
I would have better feet for dancing
I would’ve taken dance more seriously at a younger age
I would be lefthanded/ambitdextrious
I would be fluent in many languages
I would have better self control
I would not fall victim to procrastination
I would be more open with those I care about in my life
I would talk more
I would smile more
I would feel okay feeling like I belong where I am…

I would stick up for myself more often. I do really well with this over the internet, but not in person.
I’ve come to find that I’m a bit of a people-pleaser. I often ignore my needs over someone else’s because I want to make others happy and I fear that if I reject a request so I can instead do something for myself, people will think badly of me.

I’m also really tolerant and immune to things people find offensive and/or disgusting. Because of this, people misunderstand my motives and opinions on such topics, just because I don’t have the reaction most people would. Half of me wants to change this, but the other half realizes it’s not my problem if someone wants to misunderstand me without talking to me about it first. As long as I understand my intentions and they aren’t malicious, I don’t see what the problem is.

I would stop leaving things unfinis

I’m already good now. And I accept the way I am.

I would have a clearer sense of what is real and true about significant relationships and not look to make them into more or less then they can be.

I would spend less time up in my head and more time accomplishing things.

I would (and am trying to) change my habit of not talking about emotions I don’t consider ‘good’ and act out instead…...

My inability to respect my father.

I would listen more before speaking.
I would interrupt much less often
I would speak more softly
I would avoid offering advice when it not is not requested.
I would read the questions better before formulating an answer.
I would make love more often

I would become more socially adept.

What would I change about myself? I’d stop allowing others to think they can change me.

I hate my mood swings. Although I am able to control them most of the time I can’t hide them from myself. My emotional balance is so fragile and I hate that so much.

I’d like to be able to believe that others love me and that their love won’t go away the first time I make a big mistake and hurt them. If could feel like I wasn’t always on probation, I wouldn’t be so tense and neurotic.

I would get off the couch.

I would have more fun.
I would stop worrying about things so much.
I would live in the moment.
I would learn to trust more again.

I want to learn more “man stuff”, how to fix a car, how to fix a leak, etc. so I don’t have to pay men to do things for me all the time.

I would stop convincing my self that being in solitude all the tome can maintain emotional stability. :/

There are elements of my character which, if altered, may cause me to live a better general life, but I would never choose to perform these alterations for two main reasons.

Firstly if one attains anything without working towards it in some manner it shall be hugely less appreciated than if it were. If an average person were handed an Olympic medal tomorrow what would it be to them but a piece of metal? Adding to this, how will I have come to thoroughly understand the intricacies of something, for example my new found organisational skills (I am very disorganised) if they were simply granted to me? It is through working towards something that we gain perspective on it which allows us to retain and continue to develop that ‘something’.

Secondly, even if I were capable of moulding my personality to my will who would I be anymore? All of ones characteristics are aspects of themselves. Discarding the “bad” ones in a short period of time may prove equally as detrimental as discarding the “good” ones in the same period.

I understand and appreciate that many would simply enjoy having perceived problems with themselves swept away. I doubt there are many who don’t. But all too many seemingly fail to realise that the time spent fantasizing about these improbable “quick fixes” could be used in the pursuit of a more wholesome and meaningful “genuine fix”.

May I note that this comment isn’t directed at any replies here and if this has been perceived as such I sincerely apologise. It’s just a general thought on my part.

@ChazMaz
I have a friend who spends most of his time on his couch. He once said to me that he was determined to go out and enjoy a sunny day so I went along with him. We ended up in a furniture store…On a couch

Stop trying to find quick solutions when my wife is angry.

@mattbrowne Depeding on how angry she is, I might suggest getting out of the house, quickly. Hell hath no fury…

I wish I was more carefree. I am in a constant state of feeling anxious to the point where I have to plan pretty much every hour of my day to stop myself feeling panicky about things. I have to think ahead each day of what the worse case scenarios could be and plan a way to avoid them before they have even happend (some of which are extremely unlikely to happen). I can’t go with the flow at all. Silly things worry me to the point of panic attacks. For example, if someone says they will call me back in an hour and don’t a freak out. What has happened to them? Are they ok? Are they still alive? I hate feeling this way all the time.

@bob_ – If she’s really angry with me that might be the best course of action. What I meant was that she’s angry about something or someone and my comment starts with “oh, you really should…”. I’ve learned that this is very counterproductive. The correct comment is something like this “oh, honey, how awful, gee, that is so unfair, I’m so sorry, oh dear…” and it’s totally devoid of any suggestions or problem solving.

@mattbrowne The voice of an experienced man.

@mattbrowne So some men are educable!

I learned my lessons, just took almost 2 decades ;-)

That’s faster than some!

Shall we move on to how long women need to understand men?

I would change my hair colour.
I would re arrange my mind so I wasn’t so paranoid and anxious.
I would be confident.
I would be happy with myself.