With the rising numbers of stay-at-home Dads, will respect and prestige of domestic work increase?

It’s possible. I’m a stay at home dad, and let me tell you, it’s a hard ass job. But I doubt it’ll be something I can put on a resume anytime soon.

It’s annoying to think that after so many generations of managing a home, children, and spouses – a full-time job [24/7 vs 40/5] – women won’t get the true credit we’ve deserved. Sure, I’m glad for the men who stay home and manage the household, but I’m bitter that it took men to work in the field before recognition was given.

Before industrialization both men and women worked from the home, making with their hands the things the family needed to survive and prosper. After industrialization when we started manufacturing goods for money, men were put in charge because the prevailing thought was that women were inferior to men. The fact that men were now bringing home a wage for their labors increasingly devalued the woman’s role in the home, regardless of the fact that what she did was vital to the continuation of the family.
I think that unfortunately, the more men who are in the home and get a firsthand look at what homemaking actually entails, it will be seen as a more valuable contribution.

Will respect and prestige for the position finally be realized? My answer is yes,by many men and few women,as many women are already there.

my reaction is gggrrrrrr
yes it probably will and
even more gggrrrr

Heh. Of course, once a man does it, it’s respectable and difficult work. Obviously. Why didn’t we understand that before? I’m really glad a man has shown us this.

I kind of doubt it. But it is an interesting question.

Of course we assume that all women view this as valuable work already, including those that have never done it, which is obsurd as well. I don’t think it will gain prestige as men that stay with the kids are simply viewed as weaker or feminine. ~Awesome.~

Unfair, but true.
Watch, when the day finally comes that we have a female president (hopefully soon) then her husband will start complaining about what a hard job being the “first man” is.

I didn’t know First Lady was so looked down on, but I’m not surprised. That’s an intense job too, though. Or at least it certainly can be. I hope they don’t call him “First Man” this assumes as much as First Lady does as a title, and I don’t like it. First Spouse would be a decent replacement.

‘Will respect and prestige of domestic work increase’?
Well yes I certainly think it will. Men are now realising what a difficult job it is looking after a home and children.
But I do think men will do an equally good job of it.

It was always valuable and difficult work and should have always been realized as so. For it to be realized as such now is pathetic and points to inherent sexism in our society. In general, actually, I think the opposite of what you say might happen – more men will be stay at hom dads and experience crap for being stay at home parents just like all stay at home moms do.

I have been thinking about this question. I think jobs that are perceived as needing a specialized skill get the most respect in our society. If few people are capable of doing, even more respect. I think childcare, cleaning, running errands, shopping, and cooking are perceived as being able to be done by the majority of the population, so it is underappreciated. Also, it is not really a mystery, so underappreciated.

I am not saying that I don’t see it as valuable work, I am just laying out why I think it suffers from being thought of as prestigious, so I am inclined to say that the gender doesn’t matter.

@JLeslie But it was always considered women’s work and women were always considered inferior so gender does play into it.

@Simone_De_Beauvoir I don’t disagree with your point. But, historically women did work that did not require formal education, so I think some of it comes from that. That those jobs that women did, did not command the respect, because of the jobs themselves. What do you think? Again, I am not judging the work myself, for the last 4 years my primary job has been taking care of the house and basically bein my husbands personal assistant. LOL. We don’t have kids, so the job is pretty easy.

@JLeslie: That could not be further from the truth – and that’s why there are so many screwed up individuals today. Directly implying that many mothers didn’t raise their children to be upstanding individuals.

Very few women are capable of truly running a household, most sit at home and watch tv. It takes a lot to keep a home in tip top shape – and you must know cost saving ways to do it. Running a home is much like any trade – carpentry or plumbing, for instance.

Housewife = wife who doesn’t work.
Homemaker = wife who runs a household.

And before people go off calling me an old fart for my ideas, I’m a twenty-something wife whose parents were both bringing home 6 figure salaries. I swore in my childhood to be a good mother, and raise my children, instead of the hands-off approach.

@JLeslie You have to think of it the other way around – because they were delegated to the home and to doing ‘women’s work’ like childrearing they were not allowed formal education because that was the man’s domain and clearly a woman wasn’t cut out for it. Only jobs in the public domain commanded respect becasue they had to do with discovery, economics, trade, culture.

@Simone_De_Beauvoir I agree. We agree. We are saying the job itself doesn’t have, or is not given as much respect because it doesn’t have to do with discovery, business, trade, etc.

@squirbel I don’t understand at all why you think I am directly implying that many mothers didn’t raise their children to be upstanding individuals. Where do you get that from? And, I agree running a household is honorable work. Especially rasing children. I think having distinctive roles can help the family as a unit function better. Everything counts. I don’t see one part of the equation as more important than the other.

@JLeslie But it’s all about where the values was (is) placed – you know when they told women it was their Christian duty to stay at home and continue to make children, they made it sound really valuable, like doing god’s work or some bs so that the women would feel guilty for wanting anything else. The ‘real’ (is there such a thing) was placed on outside endeavors but only because those in power were doing it, not because these things are actually more valuable, because they aren’t.

I think gender is part of it- not the whole – but a big part.

I also agree with @JLeslie ‘s statement that people who have jobs that others think they could do with ease, don’t generally get the respect the job deserves. Such as a janitor, cashier or waiter/ress.

To be honest, some days I’m a housewife and some days I’m the homemaker. Even I need a day off every now and then lol

@Simone_De_Beauvoir I agree. I think everything is valuable, everything counts. I respect all work. The guy who swept the floor when I worked at Bloomingdale’s deserves just as much respect as the Store Manager in my opinion. Every part of the business has to get done. It all counts. But I think you are still frustrated by my response. I think I am missing something, or we are not communicating/understanding each other well. So to sum up, you do think that when men start running the household and women are out in business, then running the household will get more respect.

I mean I think about teachers. I don’t think male 4th grade teachers get more respect than female ones, and that is traditionally a female job. I think since many people are capable of the job from an IQ perspective, and the degree is not that hard, it is not paid as well as some other jobs, because we function on supply and demand in our society, even though we all agree teaching our children is very important. Not many people can do brain surgery, so they can command a higher pay. Running a household is similar, many people are capable of doing it, it is not really a specialized skill, although I admit some people are much better at doing it than others and it does take skill, and it does deserve respect. No question.

I very much find value and respect in all work. I personally do not judge work by skill or education level.

NO. People wondered about this in the 1970’s and nothing much happened in respect to the “domestic keeper of the hearth”. Our American society is a hypocritical one, all the way. If a man stays home with children or to maintain the home then he’s seen as having some flaw of character. Growing up, I saw several couples where the man stayed home and the talk was always, “what a waste with his degrees and all… she works so hard, you think he’d feel ashamed not to get out there… blah blah.”

I keep thinking about this, and I think it’s because, as a stay at home dad, I’m confident, that most stay at home dads would’ve already been some of the greatest advocates of womens’ rights before they were stay at home dads… I guess I’m saying that it’s unlikely to really change perception, and that it won’t help to get upset at stay at home dads for attempting to bring some respect to the job.

@JLeslie – I wasn’t saying you were directly implying that – I was. Not just any woman can stay at home and successfully raise her children. Merely staying at home does not beget upstanding civilians – but being a homemaker with due diligence does.

@gemiwing – Me too, at least two days a week. :P

@squirbel Oh, I see. My comments were really based on how society looks at things, except where I said how I personally felt. I think you are saying that a job well done is what should command respect.

I feel like we all generally agree, but are getting caught up in one anothers’ semantics.

Nah, I just think gender roles will start to switch up a bit.

@JLeslie I’m not frustrated – I am between opinions – I think some people will think it’s more valuable now that men do it (of both genders) and I disagree with them…on the other hand I think men will just get crap for staying at home, because it’s women’s work and beneath them – it all comes from sexism in the end.

@Simone_De_Beauvoir Ok, glad you are not frustrated. I was afraid I was not explaining my opinion well. I don’t think I am right necessarily.