How do you call a stranger?

“Hey man, can I borrow I pen?” (if it’s a guy)
“Excuse me” is fine too. That’s probably best if you’re talking to a girl.

It is polite to say excuse me, I don’t know about formal.

Remember please and thank you don’t cost anything, but they can make a world of difference in how your request is received and answered.

In the U.S. we don’t normally use any form of address (any generic name) when speaking to a stranger who is our peer or classmate. Those forms of politeness have mostly dropped out of our language and our social customs, I’m sorry to say. Some of those formalities have lasted longer in certain regions of the country.

“Excuse me” is a customary opening. “Excuse me” and “Pardon me” mean the same thing when you are actually asking to be excused (such as when passing in front of or between people), but “Excuse me” is also a request for attention.

When speaking to a stranger in a public place, we might use “miss” for a youngish woman and “ma’am” for an older woman, “sir” for an older man. An older person might address a much younger one as “young man” or “young lady.” It would go something like this:

[In a theatre with reserved seating] Excuse me, ma’am, but I believe that’s my seat.
[In a department store, addressing another customer] Excuse me, miss, I think you dropped something.
[Anywhere] Excuse me, sir, could you tell me what time it is?

[Older person to younger person] Thank you for the help, young man.

If you are an employee in a service role, such as waiting on tables or helping a customer in a store, you use “sir” and “ma’am” or “miss” when speaking to your customers.

Younger or my age, “excuse me” or if they’re at a distance “Hey!” followed by “excuse me” when they turn around.

Older “excuse me, sir/ma’am”

Japanese “sumemasen” (the u’s regionally silent)

It depends where you live. If I am young, in school, as you said in your example, and speaking to someone else I would just say, “excuse me, do you have a pencil I can borrow?” If I am any age and in SOUTH and addressing an adult it would be customary to say “excuse me ma’am/sir…” But in the north they would never use ma’am, just excuse me.

What state are you in? Assuming you are in the US.

In modern German the word stranger has almost disappeared, perhaps because many view it as politically incorrect. Alternatives are visitor, newcomer, immigrant depending on the context.

@mattbrowne What do you call someone who you have never met before? That is who the OP is referring to. The OP is the foreriegner it seems, or maybe she is going to an English speaking school in her own country.

friend if a man
nothing if it is a woman ( i just go straight with what i want ) followed by a “please”

Oh, and men will also use “buddy” or “pal” man to man: “Hey, pal, you looking for something?” “Hey, buddy [or “bud”], got a match?” Women don’t do this. At least, native-English-speaking white American women don’t. Customs vary among communities of other ethnic and language groups.

And in a restaurant of a certain type, you are likely to be called “hon” by the waitress, no matter how old you are.

@Jeruba Certain type or almost anywhere in Jersey and Staten Island. LOL. I once told my friends I am going to write a book that tells people what to say and what not to say when visiting various regions in the US. I can only imagine what it is like for a foreigner, it is confusing for Americans.

@JLeslie – Like stranger, the word foreigner is on the retreat. I’m merely observing what has happened over the past 30 years. What do I call someone who I have never met before? As I said it depends on the context. New classmate, visitor, newcomer, immigrant. There’s even a term ‘people with migration background’.

@mattbrowne Oh, I see, I misunderstood at first. You are talking about the use of the word stranger in the original question. I have never thought about the idea that the word might be going out of style. All of the words you mention don’t seem to apply to her question. I would not know how else to say it in English except to say it the “long” way: someone I don’t know. Or, someone I have never met before.

@JLeslie yes i’m in U.S. ^^

@sEventoRii Then it depends where in the US. We are such a big country that things vary from city to city. Probably you have to observe what others do and figure it out, or if you have a close friend who is understanding of your situation you can ask her. Or, if your mom or dad is comfortable asking one of their friends or coworkers. My husband had a Canadian coworker who used to ask us question when we lived in NC, because her kids had similar problems knowing what to say in certain situations and English was their first language.

I had an Iranian girflriend when I was in school, and when her family first left Iran they went to England. In England they call erasers, like to erase pencil, rubbers. Anyway, later they moved to the US, and she was in class in 8th grade I think it was, and one day she needed an eraser, so she said out loud, “does anyone have a rubber I can borrow?” The class laughed at her, because in America we use the word rubber for condoms. Ugh, poor thing was mortified.

I am just telling the story because it is very hard to get it all correct when you move from one place to another. I think it is wonderful you want to know the right way to address someone, but also remember to be easy on yourself as you adjust to a new place.

Good luck, I hope you like the US :).