What would you do if you got really angry at one of your parents?

I’d work on my anger issues.

Depends entirely on age and if you are living with their assistance or if they are living off of yours.

If you are under their roof you have to suck on a thumb and just cry in your pillow about it, or get out. I live on my own. My parents live on their own. How I would deal with it would depend on the issue, but I would consider cutting off their allowance.

What is your relationship with your parents like? Can you talk to him or her? Do you feel justified in your anger? It’s not unusual to get really angry in intimate relationships; you just have to decide how you want to deal with it.

I would act with the body of knowledge that you didn’t present in the question…your question is too vague to answer properly.

What is the situation? Anger is a normal reaction, unless it’s a totally irrational response to some small thing. Other than that, it’s OK. Why are you so worried, and why do you feel you need to do something? It’ll pass. But, again, what is the situation? PS. Both of my parents are dead. I’d love the chance to get mad at them just one more time….

If it helps, my therapist tells me to use “I” messages to tell someone how I feel.

“I feel really intruded upon when people enter my room without knocking. I feel really embarrassed if I’m not decent. ”

This focuses on your feelings instead of blaming. “You are always barging in. You are wrong.” Focusing on explaining your feelings instead of attacking or blaming keeps the other person from getting so defensive.

When you cool off try to verbalize how you are feeling. At least then you will have communicated about it. However, if they are already fully aware you are upset and why, then there is really nothing else you can do. Go for a good hard run, stay the weekend with a friend and get a break, try to cool your head off. Even better, let that anger motivate you to work hard and save money and build a future, so you can leave all that behind.

Yes, cookie, tell us more. Everyone gets mad at their parents, but how bad is it this time, and why is it so hard? We are all waiting to jump into this question, because there’s not a person on earth who hasn’t had to think about this.

What is your age? What is your relationship with them? Can you give any more details on the nature of the anger?

well it’s hard to explain but I said that I wanted to go to church but my parents say no and so I feel like I’m not doing anything on sundays and I got cheesed off at them and now I fell like running away and I’m really confused!!
anyways thanks for giving me advice guys!!

I don’t think you should get mad at them. But I don’t think this is an issue that’s worth quarreling with your parents about, rather, you should try and discuss it with them. But I do think you should go to Church anyway. It’s ridiculous that they said no to that. There are infinitely many worse things that you could choose to do with your Sundays, and their freaking out over church?!

Go to church.

As an adult, I got really angry at my mother, and I didn’t speak to her for a year.

If I was a young person still living at home, I would talk to someone else about what I was angry about and get some feedback on whether my anger was justified and whether I should try to work things out with my parent.

If you are under 18 years of age, living in the US, then please respect the wishes of your parents while consistently making them aware of your desires. If you are 18 years or older, then do whatever you like and enjoy your adulthood. You may find yourself at the mercy of your landlord however, and in that case, you have some decisions to make.

Your church friends should have no problem meeting with you after church and telling you about the service. You could also get a small bible and stick it in your bookbag. You shouldn’t have to get rid of it unless requested by your parents.

Make sure that your parents know what is important to you. Let them know that if their beliefs are so strong and valid, that they should be able to withstand a little confrontation. Only the weak views are the ones that cannot be challenged. Ask them if their views are so weak that they cannot withstand a challenge.

Yes but I live in canada and I’m not 18 so.. by the way thank you everyone that has or will responded!! I really apriciate it!!

@marinelife, in my case I held out for only seven months. That was long enough for me to understand that she was not ever going to apologize (and she didn’t). I did my best to let it go, but I never really got over it. That was more than 30 years ago. She died two years ago, and I am still sorting it out. Damn, that stuff goes deep.

I’d get counseling, fast. My parents have been dead for nearly six years now.

I’d bitch and moan and remember that I don’t want to just throw my mom out on her ass because she did take care of me earlier in life and I should repay the favor but boy, does she make it hard sometimes.

All you can do is let yourself feel angry for a period of time and then talk to your parent about it. It will help to talk to him or her about how angry you were and why. Parents know that kids get angry at them. It can’t be avoided as kids start growing up in the face of parental authority. Parents see maturity in their kids as the kids begin to be able to handle the anger without resorting to childish tantrums.

If you’re angry with anyone, parents or not, the responsible thing to do is to talk. You want to listen to the other person’s point of view, and they should return the favor. You have to actually listen, not jump in to rebut every point. Once you understand each other, you can see if you can negotiate a resolution to the problem that works for all.

Do you know why your parents say you can’t go to church? You have to understand that first before you can deal with your issue.

I agree with @wundayatta. This is not worth getting mad at your parents over. It’s a talking issue. Ask them why they don’t want you to go. “Because I said so” is not a real reason. Spend some time think about their reasons, and then communicate why you would like to go.

I have been on both sides of this situation. As a teen, my mother refused to drive me to a football game in October because I wanted to wear a coat, and we had just spent money on some new clothes for me, including the very cute outfit I bought to wear to the game. So I went without wearing a coat, the weather dropped to 20 degrees, and as this was before cell phones, I had to wait until she picked me up. I was sick for days, and she told me it was my own fault.

On the other side, my children attended Catholic grade school, and then transferred to a public school where a lot of the kids went to one particular Christian megachurch. My youngest daughter had a hard time, because the kids told her the wasn’t Christian and would go to hell. She begged me to take her to the church, so she and I both went, and I sent her to summer church camp. At camp, the youth minister called and asked if she could be baptized, as lot of kids were being saved, and my daughter indicated that she wanted to be too. I talked to her and told her as a Catholic, she had already been baptized, and that I would prefer we talk about it before she did it, and that if she still wanted to do it, she could, at the church. When she came home, we talked about it, and decided it would be okay, so I called the church youth minister, said it would be fine, and made arrangements to have her baptized at an upcoming youth group meeting.

The youth group meeting turned out to be at someone’s home, where there was a pool party for the kids and they were going to baptize her in the swimming pool in the middle of the pool party. We put a lot of thought into the decision, and the minister seemed puzzled that we wanted to stay, and when I commented that we took the decision about the baptism seriously, and that doing the ceremony in the middle of a swim party seemed sacrilegious, he made the comment, “Oh at this age, they don’t know what it’s all about, and don’t know what to think about God. We get hold of them and tell them what and how to think.”

Now, to me, that statement was really contrary to how I personally feel about thinking about religion, and is insulting to my child, because he was in essence telling me that the church’s position was that all middle schoolers were mindless sheep, in need of programming. We left, and did not go back.

My point is telling this is that, depending on the church that you want to attend, your parents may have a fundamental problem with either the idea of organized religion in general, or they may have a problem with the particular church that you would like to attend. But you need to talk to them about it without getting angry, and think about it in terms of what is right with their reasoning, and what is wrong with their reasoning. The part that is causing the anger is because it feels like control, and you sound old enough to get more of a reason than just NO for something that doesn’t involve danger or spending your parent’s money. Conversely, by being old enough to deserve more than just a NO, you need to give their opinions and reasoning thought and consideration. You don’t have to agree with it, but think about it.

While you live in your parent’s house, they may be able to put limitations on your actions, but they cannot really control how you think, and if you feel drawn towards a certain religion for valid reasons, that is entirely your choice. You have a right to choose for yourself, and with that right comes the responsibility to choose wisely and with deliberation, in your own best interests.

Sorry this is so long.

That’s a little crazy that they wouldn’t let you go to church! I know it’s frustrating, but you have to concede to their wishes.

get over it.

I told my father he wasn’t my father anymore and meant it.