Help with a lecherous party guest.

Just be civil as if he were a stranger- no personal talk. Don’t be alone in a corner with him. As a mattere of fact, try to keep your back to him- no eye contact!

Is it things he thinks or things he does? You can’t stop him from thinking, but you can discuss your feelings with your friends and make sure you are not left alone with him at any point. Or if he just really creeps you out to be near, explain it to your friends and don’t go to the party.

Now, is that any way to be talking about your husband, Mrs?

You can’t control what he thinks,but if he says anything inappropriate embarrass the hell out of him in front of others.A nice calm voice and a smirk works well.if he puts his hands on you,all bets are off good luck :)

Has he sexually harassed you, groped you without consent, etc? How creepy are we talking? If you don’t feel safe around him, don’t go.

Bring a hot date with you & smother yourself all over your date. Let them know you are taken!!

Announce to all in a loud steady voice, has anyone got a pair of tweezers & a magnifying glass, this guy is in need of them.Then hopefully this jerk will jerk off in a manner of speaking.

When I was younger I would usually grab there hand and twist it back and let them know if they ever try to touch me, ever again I would break their hand and then hit them in the balls. Be sure to grab their hand gently at first like your going to be nice and then pop it back but just enough to hurt them and tell them what I just wrote in a quite hush serious tone and they will call you a bitch an walk away. It always worked for me when I was younger and they get the point.

Heck I would fill a plate with anything sloppy with tomato sauce and hot sauce with a big ol glass of red wine and trip over something anything and spill the whole lot all over him. Apologize profusely and walk away. That should send him packing or at the very least keep him in the mens room for an hour or so and if he decides to come back he most certainly will steer clear of you!

Send out a vibe that you aren’t going to tolerate any nonsense from him, and that you would rather just keep your distance. No eye contact, to sideways glances etc. Then, focus on your two really good friends. Stick with them, and try not to go anywhere alone, They are the reason why you’re even going anyway right?

@lloydbird . you’re amazingly hilarious.

You need to be the strong one here. You’re bigger than this person.
If he gives you a hard time, you need to shut that down immediately. Don’t feel like you have to be polite to anyone. That’s enough to make most of these leches back down. If he gives you problems, get back up.

@lloydbird LOL!!
@everyone Thanks so much for answering.

@escapedone7 He has taken pictures of me with his camera phone while at a Christmas party. (I was just laughing and smiling with my friends, no big deal) But I didn’t know he had taken them, and then at the New Years party, he showed me the pictures and told me what he did to himself to them. He sits too close, gets in my face and makes me feel physically nauseous. Just thinking about it makes me want to be sick.

If he gives you a problem.

Tell him you only date Eunichs, and if he really wants to go out with you, you can snip him now, you have pruning shears in the car.

Be kind, smile, think about his brighter side… If he has one.

If not, smile at him but do not let thoughts of him thinking of you ruin your day, don’t think about it.

The idea is to embarrass him without him being able to get back at you. Some of the ideas here are great. Talk to your friends. Tell them you want to be there for them, but this is your problem. Ask them to head him off if he gets even ten steps away from you.

I like the idea of hiring a personal body guard for the evening. Can you afford it? :o)

@MrsDufresne Your comment to @escapedone7 should be typed out and put as a note in your pocket for the big day. When he approaches you and says hello, look him in the eye without smiling, without grimacing, but look him in the eye emotionless, reach into your pocket, and hand him the note. Walk away.

If he approaches you again, and he will out of guilt, or an attempt to save his rep, have another note ready to go. This one says, “I do not wish to associate with you. Please respect my wishes. Do not attempt further contact”. And walk away again.

If he tries it a third time, get your friends involved. You may actually want to tell your friends the entire plan before hand so they can be ready to intervene when you give them the signal. They will be extremely pissed off that he did not respect your wishes, thrice, and everybody understands “three strikes you’re out”.

Expose him. Get the immediate gratification, AND the knowledge that he will make sure he never ever goes anywhere you are going again!

I’ve been there. Tell your friends about this guy (if they don’t know already) and let them handle it. It’s easier to be frank, while still being polite when you aren’t the victim. They told the guy to back off and never talk to me again, and it worked :)

You’re entirely too nice – screw that – if he said one more thing to me, I’d tell him to ‘fuck the hell off’ with a smile adding that if he comes anywhere near me again, my stiletto will end up where the sun don’t shine promptly.

Can’t you just ignore him? If not, don’t go to the party. No need to be “physically ill” over something like this.

Tell your friends about the pictures and what he said to you and DON’T GO. After they hear what he did, if they’re really your friends, they’ll suggest that the three of you skip this party and go elsewhere. If not, then they’re not very good friends, so don’t feel bad about not being with them at the party…

I dumped a beer in the crotch of a guy that was saying things about me. No one sticks around with a wet crotch.

@MrsDufresne: Wow, your description of his behavior to @escapedone7 made me feel nauseous too! That’s a real creep. He sounds immature as well.

If you’ve already tried to convey to him (using facial expressions, etc.) what you think of him and his creepiness, and he persists at this party, don’t engage any discussion with him at all, look at him with an expression of disbelief and walk away to another location. If it’s bothering you enough to feel anxious of his potential behavior towards you, I would probably tell my friends too so that if he approaches you maybe they can run interference discreetly (or not). You have a right to enjoy yourself at a party and he shouldn’t be taking your appearance as a green light to monopolize your time there, especially if you haven’t given him any encouragement. My condolences.

I knew a man once who thought it was a compliment for you if he masturbated to your picture.

@faye: Maybe he’s the same creep who is offending @MrsDufresne I hope there’s only one

This was a Canadian creep. I think there’s a few men that think we like to hear that kind of stuff” makes us hot”. They are the ones sitting on the last barstool by themselves and can’t figure it out!

@faye – Lots of men masturbate to photos of women they’re attracted to. And some women would, indeed, take it as a compliment. But only a creep would say so to a woman that he doesn’t know well enough to know that she would be offended by it.

I’ve got to agree with @Simone_De_Beauvoir this creep needs putting in his place. People like him thrive on our insecurities & adherence to acceptable social norms. Basically, he’s identified you as a ‘victim’, perhaps because you have a slightly withdrawn personality, or are quiet or whatever the reason. He’s banking on the fact that you will put up with this & not make a fuss, it’s how creeps like this operate…. Now, do you know anyone who’d be prepared to take him outside & beat the living crap out of him?

@JeffVader, and now the party is getting fun!

OK @MrsDufresne… How did your encounter go yesterday? Did you follow anyone’s advice here? Something else? Did you chicken out and not go? Did you end up falling in love the “lecherous party guest”? Did he bother you again? Is there a Youtube video up yet?

@RealEyesRealizeRealLies (sorry I didn’t update sooner) Turned out he chickened out and did not show up at all. We had an awesome time!!!

@MrsDufresne woot!

@MrsDufresne That’s great – thanks for the update.

@MrsDufresne – So the party was uber fredashay! :-)

All that worry for nothing. But doesn’t it annoy to all ends that we have to work ourselves up to a lather of worry when it’s someone else’s bad manners or behavior? Yeeesh.

@Siren Yes, it is quite exasperating.

Gross, I can’t stand eyebrow lickers. One time I had this weirdo following me around spouting risqué poetry. Pretty high up there on the gagometer. I simply told him to shut up or I’d kick him in the Haiku.

@Silhouette: I love your comment! Made me laugh. And your term Haiku was hilarious.