How do you avoid upsetting yourself?

I go to sleep

Reflection.

Not much else to say. Just really think, “Why does this bother me? How does this really effect my life? If I ignore this how much better will I feel?”

Not sure how old you are, but after going through stuff like several times already I am much better at dealing with this type of thing. I might be very upset for a day or so, but I quickly move to anger and then; generally, I can just think that person is either mentally unbalanced or a piece of shit and it helps me :).

Seriously, well that was kind of serious, but I do want to say that if it is someone you have a meaningful relationship with (close friend, family member, SO), and you value the relationship, the best thing is to be able to talk and communicate with the person so you can understand each other and help each other to feel better. Sometimes understanding where te other person is coming from and that their intent is not to hurt you can help you feel much better. It only works if the other person is willing and wants the same thing, and if they trully do have good intentions.

I grab the Ben and Jerrys Karmel Sutra ice cream and let the anger/bothersome crap go stright to my hips.

Don’t avoid it at first. Dive right in to the topic and your feelings. Then let them go, deliberately.

I dont get on fluther, on april fools day lol. I see you ,chazmaz

By eating CHOCOLATE!!

I can’t. I can’t stop thinking and analysing. It gives me insomnia. Video games sort of help, books make it worse. Turning on my blue lights and listening to ambient music takes the edge off but doesn’t stop it.

I acknowledge my feelings first. Let myself know it’s okay for me to feel however I feel. Feelings are never wrong- actions are.

Next, I sit and think about where the feelings come from. Why, specifically, does this upset me? Is it really about what’s happening or is it my reaction to something else entirely that I’m connecting to the new situation?

I also use the HALT system. If I’m hungry, angry (in general), lonely or tired then I admit that could be a big part of why I’m more prone to being upset.

Then I’ll talk about it if I need to. Journal if I need to or just acknowledge the process and move on.

Also, I tend not to be upset about the things that most people get upset about. I don’t worry about bills or taxes, bad drivers, betrayal or the failures of my friends. I really can’t care about stuff like that.

Don’t ever allow yourself to become sober.

Experience. After a while you learn that some battles just aren’t worth the bother. Give it up. Let the other person win. You really do have better things to do with your time than to fight it and get all riled up and self-righteous about it.

Move on. Don’t let pride get you. Figure out what is important to you, and do that, spending as little time as possible on the stupid stuff in life.

If you can, escape to somewhere private and literally breathe deeply for a couple of minutes.

By thinking: “It’s only living in me.”.

And then realizing that the only person thinking about the thing, person or circumstance that is upsetting me, is me.

There was a quote that described it perfectly, about most of the people you don’t like, don’t know it or just don’t care (If anyone knows the exact quote, please feel free to refresh my memory)

I have trouble sleeping sometimes about how I’m perceived by others,(dumb, I know) and I have to remind myself that the only one who is dwelling on it is me, and I have a choice to stop and free my mind of it.

@gemiwing Truly excellent answer!!

G/Q

@wundayatta That’s why the typical things don’t bother me anymore. What keeps me from getting to sleep at night is the Westboro Baptist Church and Kaleid Sheikh Muhammed.