Does he still love me?

You should ask him.

I believe words are cheap, lot’s of people tell me they love me, but actions speak louder than words.

Some people just don’t feel the need to keep saying it. If his actions show you he loves you don’t worry about words.

It is hard for some guys to say, you can tell by the way he treats you, especially in public.

Break up with him and see what his reaction is, if he doesnt love you, he wont try to change your mind….

Don’t hang onto words so much. While they might be important and necessary to you, for some people it is not essential to say it, but believe me, they may mean it 10 times more than someone who constantly declare his love for you. Focus on other things and show your love in other ways that indicate your understanding, tolerance and patience.

Grab him and hold him close
look into his eyes and say that you love him.
Does he look away, does he back off in his closeness
or does the separation between you and he disappear and you and he melt into each other?
....,however some guys can’t take the pouring on of too much love, it’s just too much of a heavy blanket and can make them feel suffocated and it will drive them away,
Again, with the, however,
if you all are meant to be together, nothing can separate you.

cheebdragon must be joking. You love him for christ sake, don’t break up with him because of that. Some people find it hard to say it. It wouldn’t be unreasonable to bring it to his attention, that it bothers you, and if that breaks you, it was never going to last very long anyway. He can’t reassure you if he doesn’t know.

How old are you? How old is he?

The words ‘I love you’ do not come easy to many people, for different reasons. They might think actions speak louder than words- does his actions in regards to you say ‘I love you’? He might think words are cheap, as I personally think they are. Maybe he even finds it as awful that you say it constantly to him as you find it that he rarely says it to you.

You need to ask him directly.

As for the suggestion that you break up with him to find out? How childish and immature can you be? That is not an adult way to handle things.

My wife an I have been having marital problems for a while now. We’ve been in counselling. One of the issues was this one. She wanted me to tell her I loved her more often. She said she didn’t feel like I loved her because I didn’t say it.

I was incredulous! Did all the things I did because I loved her and wanted to make her happy mean zilch? The meals I cooked every night. The shopping; the things I take care of; being there at the hospital when she had her operation; taking into account her desires when we decide to do things, and on and on?

Apparently these things didn’t really mean much. I had to tell her I loved her every day. I spoke to my therapist about this. “I can’t say ‘I love you’ when I’m not feeling that ‘in-love’ feeling, but I do lover her. My whole life is based on our relationship.”

“Would it kill you to just say it, every day?” My therapist asked. “You don’t have to feel it,” she said. “You just have to say it.”

So I say it.

Men and women often seem to be different this way. Women place more faith in words; men in actions, in general.

If you want him to tell you he loves you, just tell him you like to hear the words. They make you feel good. It’s not a big deal. Just makes you feel better.

Maybe he’ll do it.

@wundayatta I am one of those who doesnt take stock in words, but “My whole life is based on our relationship” is pretty powerful. You are a good guy.

So, words arent so important,and if you are that insecure in your relationship, think about your life without him.

@wundayatta Women get hung up on words because they want the romance. Sure you may show it in everyday things you do for her and she may know you love her but she’s not feeling it when you are both caught up in daily living. Even when I’m upset with my husband I still do things for him. Doesn’t mean I feel like loving him at the moment. And I’m sure the same goes for him. Every little once in a while, something small happens. A glance from him with a smile, or a hug that lingers a little longer than usual, that lets me know that he is still attracted to me. For some people the words pore out of their mouths and it means nothing. For others they hold onto it for that special moment. And some hold onto how they feel till its too late to tell the person they love exactly how they feel. They rush to the hospital in hopes to be able to tell them they love them. Too late? Then you end up wondering the rest of your life if they really knew. Plus being able to say you love someone and mean it, is saying I trust you enough to share my feelings. Not saying it can mean, I hope you know I love you, but I don’t trust you enough to make myself that vunerable to you.

You two have to talk about what love means to each of you. Some people are deeds and actions people while others are words and physical affection. I just assumed since my partner loved me he was the same as me but he’s not and until we acknowledged the differences had no bearing on the “in love” feelings then we were getting edgy and hurt.

@wundayatta Don’t you see the difference in the love languages that you both speak? Hers is “Words of affection/affirmation”. Yours is “Acts of service”. Do you not feel more loved by her when she’s doing things for you? We each act out the primary love language that we speak. So if you speak to her in her language, she’ll be all the more willing to speak to you in yours. As long as each of you fills up the others tank with this “Language of love”, each will be more easy, more secure and more ready to fill the other persons tank. And so it goes.
You’ve solved the most difficult part, which is identifying each persons primary need. Now, all you have to do is act on it.

I would rather see or be the recipient of actions rather than words. Words can be meaningless, as someone said their own therapist told them just to say it whether they felt that way or not. That is dishonest to its core and personally I find it disgusting.