How do you usually handle this situation (details inside)

In some families, the silence is fine.

And in some families, they’re ingrained to get nervous if that happens, which is a common American trait.

I think as long as you keep your vibes in check, then silence is fine. And those who fear silence can deal with it in their own minds.

That is why I always want to have the means of escape (a car) at lengthy family gatherings.

A break in the middle goes a long way to helping avoid the run-out-of-things-to-say moments.

It depends on how they’re raised most probably. Some people are comfortable with silence like you and me, but others are wired to speak and are not comfortable with silence, normal silence for them may be an awkward situation.

Anytime I’m among close family or friends, periods of silence aren’t awkward regardless of the situation.

You could say something like; “I’m just drained, but still enjoying the communion with you all. Could we just sit together for a while and not talk?”
The thing is, we feed off of energy, and probably, no one had any to exchange at that point. Talking is a way of generating more energy. Tapping into the universal flow is more beneficial and doesn’t take from any individual, but not everyone knows how to do this, hence the resumption of speech.

Explain to the group that you are emotionally and physically exhausted and that you need time alone with your thoughts. Then excuse yourself and do whatever gives you peace.

Benjamin Franklin said it best…“Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.”

@Cruiser That was no help whatsoever.

I feel this silence results not from some sort of collective awkwardness, but fro the fact that everything that there is to be said, has been said. You got it all out of your system and didn’t have anything else to say, and that’s an opportunity that many people pass up. The mask of superego can be tiresome after a while if worn like this.

I think some people are afraid of silence. I’m not sure why. They just feel the need to talk, and to keep conversations going. I’m not that kind of person. If I have something to say, I’ll say it. If I don’t, then I’m not going to speak up just for the sake of talking. My friends and I can sit in silence for a while. Eventually, someone thinks of something to talk about, but it’s not necessary.

When I’m uncomfortable then I usually speak up and say I’m one of those people not good with a lot of emotion in the air and have to have breathers, most people get it because they feel the tension too. We all want to put on the best face and best behavior but when you’re spent, you’re spent.

@Cruiser Good point! People talk about problem family members all the time, even here on fluther (even today!).

It’s difficult when there are several different personality types. At our family gatherings, we always try to make it clear that there is a quiet room and a talking room, even if there are only two rooms. We have had both a funeral gathering (with 18 people in a two bedroom apartment, with seating on the patio for privacy) and a week long birthday celebration, with 12 people in a two room motel suite, and a spacious patio area.
(Both gatherings were visiting, not sleeping – we also had separate hotel rooms)

Our family members are all fairly comfortable with each other, but when the need for quiet or privacy occurs, there is always a retreat in the bedroom, or a walk outside for a breath of fresh air.

If you feel like this, and those awkward situations just get to you, then you should try and politely get away from the situation. Excuse yourself, and go have some you-time.

Comfortable silence is the prerogative of people who know each other well enough to be comfortable. You have been in an emotionally pressurized intimacy forced upon you by the situation and as you prepare to take your leave of one-another you are withdrawing once more into being the new or casual acquaintances you really are. An awkward transition.

Maybe some people and families who don’t live together feel that chat is a way of showing they care. My family did that whenever I saw them. It was exhausting. We never just sat in silence. My friends also do it, because we do not live together and have reached that point where we can just relax and not talk.

If I were with a group where someone wanted to fill the air with nervous chatter, I might gently ask if we couldn’t just be quiet for a while, please. Gentle honesty. Then everyone might relax, be with the silence and their own thoughts.

@jjmah Sorry about the short answer. The BF quote I used was to help you see your dilemma is an age old problem and not much you can do about ordeals that go on longer than they should. Next time you find yourself in that situation, do what I do and pack up your shit and go do something more worthy of your time!