How can I help a friend who feels down about his looks?

Well, he’s clearly not an ugly bloke…. perhaps its the combination of that hair-do & the types of girl / boy he’s trying to attract.

he obviously primps a lot. he’ll need to be patient for finding someone who appreciates his primping efforts.

looks like all the hair gel glued his hands together. that might be troublesome for dating… and driving.

Tell him to man up (if there’s an equivalent for that expression in his native language) and stop trying to be pretty. He has good features, clear skin and a nice smile. What more does a man need? (Muscles, I suppose, and a haircut or a comb, I’d say, but I understand young people these days seem to think that hair that looks like a hayfield is au courant.)

And welcome to Fluther.

I looked, and he’s not ugly. His hair, in my very humble opinion does nothing for his face. However, I’m 45 and may be out of it regarding hairstyles.

You might remind him that there are cultural differences that determine attractiveness. This might help him a bit. I wish I had a book to recommend about the subject…

I agree with the above statements about his facial structure and overall build. He strikes me as more cute than handsome, but he also looks like he will age well. He may be one of those guys that doesn’t hit his stride until middle age and then he won’t be able to fight them off. I also agree that it is a bit hard to take in his good facial features without being distracted by the hair!

Not ugly at all. Where is he living now? Maybe if his hair and clothing is not similar to the people around him, and it makes him feel insecure, he should conform a little more. My impression of him, as an American, is he is most likely gay, or maybe I am very out of touch with what younger people are sporting these days, and if he is not in America what I say means nothing in my opinion, because America is in a class by itself on some of these matters. If he is in America a more masculine hair cut might work better if he wants to attract women. BUT, mostly I think what is most important is he feel comfortable in his own skin.

He does look to have basic cutes – maybe he just needs to observe the styles around him and see if he can adapt his dress and hair, if necessary, to the prevailing culture. Is he sure the barrier is his looks or is it something else about his approach?

he’s really cute! I wonder if there’s something else going on with him because I don’t think it’s his looks!

As far as looks from a mans perspective I would not say he is unattractive and has a trendy appearance. But I will question who he is trying to appeal to? Guys or girls?? He is a snappy dresser for sure but his overall first impression is he “appears” to be a bit effeminate especially with the man purse slung on his shoulder. I might even go as far to question his sexual orientation none of which truly would matter to me but might matter to others in the world. I only offer that up as merely an observation and not as a judgment by any means and again is from a first impression glance at the overall image you posted..

European countries are more accepting of trendy, even effeminate, fashions, which is exactly how he is dressed. Now, it takes a lot of time to coiff that ‘do because it’s long, not to mention, it has a ton of product on it. I mention these things not tear him down, but to point out that he does not fit into anyones “manly man” sensibilities. If he is gay, then it’s perfect! He is old enough to know that, no matter where he is, being gay is going to deter a significant part of the population, including males and females. It ain’t right, but that’s the way it is.

If he is NOT gay, then steer him toward current fashions that exude manly confidence. Those fashions are not cutting edge. They are up-to-date, yes, but trendy is given up in lieu of classic, timeless style. And the man purse has to go if he’s not in Europe. Unless he’s hunting with his bare hands and stuffing his kills in there.

What does it matter, as long as you like him that is all that counts. We will not all find him attractive.

He is not a bad looking guy.I can tell you for sure that it is all about confidence! That is what makes a man irresistable—to me- anyway..
I had a friend named Dave who was not handsome.He got more women chasing after him that anyone I have ever met! It was due to his confidence and charm.He was something else and not full of cheezy bullshit either.He genuinely liked people(women,especially lol) and was really interested in what they had to say.He also had the attitude that if you didn’t like him or what he had to say,he didn’t worry about it.He knew himself very well and was just fine with it :)

@phillis Freaking hilarious! “And the man purse has to go if he’s not in Europe. Unless he’s hunting with his bare hands and stuffing his kills in there.” +6

I was laughing my ass off when I wrote that :D:D:D

He’s an adoreable looker, don’t see any issues for males or females being attracted to him based on that.

Either it’s actually you, or you are attracted to him.

He’s cute. That’s my first thought…self-esteem is his issue. Love him.

help him understand that Happiness doesn’t lay within the looks of anyone, but
that his happiness is found within who he already is,
actually he is already happy, but there is a blanket over everything so he can’t see it.

Hes so cute! I used to have self esteem issues because i compared myself to top models, even though my friends used to tell me that i was one of the pretty girls i never believed them. Its all about confidence,

i remember watching mtv’s spring break and the males on stage (dancing, wet t-shirt contest, stripping, i dont know what it was really called but they were trying to act sexy) there was a fat pale guy who won because he was so silly but confidant all the girls voted for him even girls jumped on stage to dance with him, his competitors were juiced up guys with 6 packs and tans and spiked up hair but they lost to him!

He was confidant not cocky, and that is what really makes you attactive.