I am quite worried by this teacher?

We are not always the best judge of these things for ourselves. Maybe a friend could accompany you sometime when you are in this teacher’s presence, and report to you what he or she saw and thought.

@dpworkin I was considering that, but I feel kind of embarrassed to tell people I know (unless it is absolutely necessary). I mean it is nothing ‘explicit’, it is just my crazy acting up again.

That’s what friends are for.

@dpworkin my crazy? i thought that was what strait-jackets were for? haha ;) thank you for your answer.

Can’t you ignore his smile? When I was a student I usually feel proud if a teacher smile to me and not for the other. It’s because that particular teacher like me. some of my friends tell me that I’m that teacher’s favorite student,many other student became jealous about this. Just smile with him whenever he smile in front of you. There’s nothing wrong with ‘just smile’,you just have to be more confident.

I keep trying to tell myself it is probably nothing, and it probably is, but I can’t convince myself enough to relax, I hate being on edge at college when I just want to hang out and chat with friends. So just slam me for being nuts or tell me that something is up, I need peace. or a therapist

I don’t think it’s fair for you to be told “just” to be more confident: clearly this is disturbing to you, but you also seem to acknowledge that on this particular issue your reality testing may not be entirely trustworthy. That’s why I suggest you ask the advice of someone else who knows you both, not of some people on the internet whom you don’t know, and who know neither you nor the teacher in question.

@dpworkin seem to acknowledge that on this particular issue your reality testing may not be entirely trustworthy
That much I manage haha
I will take your advice on asking someone I know, will take a bit of courage but it is necessary most likely a friend in his class with me so they can take a look at whats going on, but I wanted an objective view I guess, one where you could look at it and immediately say X, Y, or Z is/is not happening therefore this.
Thank you again for your answer :)

I feel sorry if I hurt someone here. I just gave my opinion regarding this question. I never said that I really know about this teacher but again,I was just giving my suggestion. I don’t see there’s a memo here that said ‘you can only answer this question if you really know entirely about this teacher’.

@Doctor_D nah! you didnt hurt anyone :) Thanks for your answer, it is actually what I have been trying to do hehe
It is easier said than done though :)

@Doctor_D I’m sorry if you understood my answer to be a slap against you. Sometimes people disagree. It is reasonable to expect that to happen from time to time. I apologize if you took my remarks personally. I was just trying to help the OP.

To me I think he is very scarcastic. It seems that he likes things to be done properly and on time and he seems to give you that scarcastic smile whenever he is not pleased. I think that if he doesnt like something then he should tell you about it. He needs to have better communication with his students.

I agree with the suggestion that you do some reality checking by having a friend observe his behavior. If it does seem that he is behaving slightly inappropriately to you – and it does seem like it might be only slightly – minimize the times you are on your own with him.

Friends are a great resource for reality checking and it is worthwhile taking someone into your confidence on this.

@dpworkin No no,that’s okay. I don’t feel offended at all. I also appreciate your comment. I’ve just clarified my answer here anyway.

I also like that friends trick as others have already suggested. But I suspect that this teacher could act differently when you bring your friend to observe him. Anyway,you should give it a try first.

You are entirely right about one part of this question: You are definitely too deep in your own head about this. But that’s somewhat understandable, I suppose, as you relate at the end of the Q.

So next time he does that, just come out of your head and ask him, “What? What is so funny?” It may really be something silly / funny like you have broccoli stuck to your teeth or something.

If he’s serious about his job / career / profession as you suggest, then it may also be helpful to lay some cards on the table: “Look, I don’t know what you’re smiling about when you do that and it bothers me.”

Don’t discount that this may be perfectly ordinary and reasonable. We don’t know you or your history with this teacher. It may be that he always has students promising “to have this done by lunch time,” and it never happens. I’d smile about that, “Oh, surrrrre you’ll have it by lunch time. No doubt!”

Put yourself in his shoes a little bit and ask, “What could be funny about what I’m saying?” and if it’s not clear, just ask.

@CyanoticWasp Put yourself in his shoes a little bit and ask, “What could be funny about what I’m saying?” and if it’s not clear, just ask.

great advice :) thanks
I will try and look at it without my head getting clouded up by past situations. There is a good chance that it is absolutely nothing.

So…... have you told a member of the faculty, such as department head about ur concerns yet? If not, get yappin!

@JeffVader I wouldn’t suggest doing that unless it was very clear that the teacher is giving her inappropriate signals. She sounds unsure if that is the case. Even charges that are proven to be unfounded can ruin a teacher’s career and life for good.

@janbb & it’s just that sort of thinking that lets people take advantage of situations like this. Universities & colleges have well established procedures for dealing with things like this. & she is already feeling uncomfortable around this man, that’s not imagined. The responsibility is on the teacher, not the student, to behave in an appropriate manner!

Yes, but she’s unsure if he is behaving inappropriately or not. What I and others have suggested is that she do some reality checking with a friend as an observer. If she then is convinced, she can decide what action to take. I know harassment is serious, but I don’t believe in hitting ants with sledgehammers.

@janbb That’s for the university to decide, not for young students with no experience employment law or sexual harassment legislation… why do you think the human resources departments of these huge institutions set policy, send people on training, have people dedicated to look into this sort of thing? The bottom line is, this teachers behaviour has made her feel uncomfortable, therefore it should be investigated. Its permissive attitudes like that, that allows predators to get away with inappropriate behaviour & worse. If he’s done nothing wrong & she’s feeling creeped out for no reason, then that’s what the university will find.

@JeffVader Its permissive attitudes like that, that allows predators to get away with inappropriate behaviour & worse. If he’s done nothing wrong & she’s feeling creeped out for no reason, then that’s what the university will find.

Absolutely correct, best thing I have heard all week. Its very comforting to have it put like that.
I am going back tomorrow and I have him first thing lucky lucky me
Current plan is to keep to myself and get friends to see if anything odd is happening as well as watching him myself, seeing if he approaches me even though I’m not provoking any contact.

This plan also involves me donning some sort of ankle length potato sack to cut out any risk of. well. anything

Ah well at least my father will be pleased at my attire for once hehe.
Your answer as well as the other answers to this question have made me a lot more confident about handling the situation if something does go a bit iffy.
and for that, I thank thee ;)

@TheOnlyException Always a pleasure :) Just keep it in mind that it is not up to you to prove something is happening. You have every right to be able to go to classes & lectures without being made to feel uncomfortable….. just keep yourself safe, thats the most important thing of all!
....... I’ve heard that full length potatoe sacks are all the rage right now….... Kate Moss has been seen sporting one ;)

@JeffVader hahahaha cutting edge fashion, or is that just the peeler?

@TheOnlyException Hehehe, very silly….. explains why I liked it :)