How to stop falling for guys so easily?

How old are you?

Stupid hormones! I don’t know the answer, but I had a lot of the same problems when I was young.
I think the answer might lie in finding your own value.
My daughters actually wrote down what they wanted in a guy and refused to compromise their standards.

Get a grip, usually helps with falling.

Tie your shoelaces.

Ummm…guys have the same problem. Try making a list of the 10 things you absolutely must have in a relationship…and then 10 things you absolutely cannot stand. If you want some suggestions, let me know and I will post some.

If you’re a teenager, it kind of come with the territory. The trick is to not let it rule your life, enjoy friends,activities and learning in addition to mooning over some boy. Try to keep a balance and also learn things about yourself through what attracts you to these guys.

If you keep yourself busy with activities that expand the group of people you like and who like you and focus on group rather than couple activity. Do things that build your skills, make you more successful in school and in activities that are important to you.

Focus less on dating and be much more selective. Make a list of the qualities you would value in a guy you would be willing to date. Don’t settle for just any male who can slide his jeans on correctly.

You don’t need to have a boyfriend to have a complete and successful life.

Flirting is fun and having a crush beats boredom but if it’s distracting you from something else that needs your focus and thinking not influenced by hormones then start looking at each guy who talks to you (nice or not) as someone mostly interested in taking your time with not much return. The odds are against you anyhow to find a fun, compatible and trustworthy guy you’d enjoy dating for more than a few times so cut your loss up front by putting your guard up until you have the time and want to invest.

My general advice is to define yourself without another person in the equation first.
Too many people can’t be whole without another person to complete them and that’s the road to codependency.

Ask these crushees if they would mind if you drew their portraits.
I’m not kidding. When you get a chance to look at them very, very hard, without interruption, you’ll see that they’re regular human beings, and the spell will dissipate. Meanwhile, they’ll get all embarrassed and weird. Excellent equalizer.

@susanc Interesting tactic – I’ll have to try it sometime.

Keep this Q in mind every minute of the day. You are ultimately the only one who can control your actions. Have a plan ready. The minute you feel like you’re “falling” have something ready to go do, jogging, reading, dusting…Whatever your thing is.
You recognize a symptom and that’s a start. It’s up to you to control it.

There’s nothing wrong with seeing the good in others. It’s an admirable trait. Never forget that.

To some extent, I can relate to how you feel, though, because I have the same problem. In my case, it’s because I think better of others than I do myself, so it’s easy for me to idealize a person. I just got over a crush recently, in fact. How did I do it? With a good, strong dose of realism. I reminded myself of the reasons why the crush wouldn’t work (i.e. incompatibilities in our personalities and interests). Also, I recognized that he seemed so perfect to me because I knew little about him. When I see him, I still get that fluttery feeling inside, but I can enjoy that now without any expectations of dating him. That’s because I gave myself permission to be attracted to him, but I’m aware that he may not be the person I imagined him to be.

Although my methods make the crush control process sound easy, sometimes it can be hard. Usually it works best when you recognize signs of a crush early on and respond quickly with gentle, corrective self-talk.

If you have any questions, feel free to PM me. Good luck!

Oh @lonelydragon – great advice!

Grow a burning hatred toward the opposite sex. Loathe men completely and refuse to acknowledge their existence.