If your significant other was in a coma for over a year, would you seek another partner?
Do you and your partner have any sort of arrangement for this possibility?
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No, we don’t, that’s a really good question. It’s easy to say now, but I think I’d wait longer than a year before I’d think about taking that step.
I’d like to say no, but never being in those shoes, I’m not one to judge or decide.
My commitment was absolute and unconditional. If my lady had lived, even in a permanent comatose state, I would have gladly and lovingly cared for her for the rest of my life.
My husband has been dead for a couple of years, and before that he was pretty sick for a few months, but… oh wait, I’m old, so you probably weren’t asking about me.
Susanc gets the Eeyore Award!!!!!!
No, definitely not. I would be with her every day – talking to her and sharing time.
@susanc and @YARNLADY That raises an interesting point, though. Is age the overriding factor here? Is it expected that someone in their 60s or 70s would push through it, while for someone in their 20s it would be “unfair” to expect us to “waste” our whole lives waiting? How old do you have to be before your “whole life” turns into just “the rest of your life”? Okay, maybe I’m tired, this is getting a little crazy.
I guess, upon further thought, if I woke up from a coma and my wife had found another partner, I wouldn’t be too happy. I’d like to think I would make sure that doesn’t happen for her.
No, I was married “till death do you part” twice before my current husband, and I really mean it.
I too was married “till death do you part”, and it did part us, and I’m STILL not looking for a new partner. Unless Kevbo becomes available, of course.
We do not have any arrangements for this sort of situation. I think it would take me far longer than that to get over it if she died, so I would hang around for as long as it took. I would be in her room every day, talking to her, asking her to hang on, and trying to communicate with whatever part of her was still aware to tell her all that I hadn’t during the course of our normal lives. I realise that love is blind, but I cannot imagine ever loving another person.
I believe it would take me longer than a year to come to terms with the situation and therefore to move on.
I know my feelings right now are that “no” I would not b/c I deeply love my DH and would even if he were in such a state and don’t know honestly how I would cope let alone move on.
A big NO! Otherwise there would be no point in calling him my significant other. NEVER.
Even though I’ve never been faced with this situation, I know that it would not even occur to me to “seek another partner.” “For so long as you both shall live” has great meaning to me.
Of course not. I would stay by his side. I would never leave him.
No, not after only a year…... now, if it stretched say, into 13mths…..
@JeffVader Lmao.
But seriously, no….I think a year is way too soon to disconnect my wife if she were in a coma. I don’t know how long I’d wait. But a year? Nah, that would seem so disrespectful.
@MarcoNJ Hehe, exactly my point…. just far better put :)
No. soulmates are hooked at the hip for life. a coma is just a hurdle in the road for both.
We’ve talked about finding love after one of us dies if it comes along. We’ve never talked about being with another if one of us is in a coma. My gut reaction is no, I wouldn’t look for another.
@Simone_De_Beauvoir I wish we had discussed that. I always assumed that I’d be the first to go, being 20 years older. Now I’ll never know (not that I’m looking or anything).
Judging by the way I feel about him I don’t think I would be able to seek another partner for a very long time (longer than a year I would imagine). If he was in a coa I would want to know if there was any chance of survival before I was able to move on with my life. Just thinking about this makes me feel terrible. We don’t have any arrangement for this.
My man and I were talking about this the other day. We both said yes.
Yes. I start looking for a new partner if she falls asleep before I do.
If our relationship was at the status level of “significant other” – then no, chances are if I found something that special I’d cherish it forever, regardless of such an obstacle.
If it’s someone I’ve been dating for a few weeks/months, unless we really connected and both equally shared a deep emotional investment or the relationship demonstrated compatibility and good potential for future progression, probably.
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