Would you like to share a moment when you were a little slow on the uptake?

I’m too slow to think of anything right now but I just feel like saying:

“You monkeys you – you give me back my caps!”

It took me over 5 years to realize that I was in love. Rachel & Ellie looked at me & said “you mean you didn’t know?”

Late one night, I saw a familiar car parked. I thought my ex-gf’s new bf was ripping off her fathers antique shop. I walked up to the shop window, took a long look inside, and tapped on the window. Wrong! He was inside, banging my ex.
I felt like such an idiot.

I went out to dinner with my husband and friend. She had just spilled something on her sweater and as we were looking at it my husband had just gotten his credit card back from the waiter. He was putting it back in his wallet and asked me for a tips. I started to tell my friend how to clean her sweater so it wouldn’t stain. He then said no. Do you have any tips. And I tried to think of something else to help. Both of them looked at me and laughed because I didn’t realize he was asking me for tip money because I always carry cash and he likes to tip waiters in cash. I didn’t get it till he grabbed my purse for the cash. I was in a different world. Of course the pina colada I had probably aided that a little.

Too many to share really, but for the longest time I though Tiramisu was some kind of Sushi. LOL. It was only when someone brought some to an office potluck that I realized it was an Italian cake. I can be and have been even more dimwitted and obtuse than that but I have blocked many things from my memory in order to protect my fragile ego. :)

I’m not as quick to catch onto things more often than I’d like. I can’t think of anything specific right now. I’ll sometimes be the last one to understand a joke. It drives my friend crazy because then she has to explain why it’s funny. She says, ”it’s not funny if I have to explain it. Then I say, ”well, then it probably wasn’t funny to begin with.”
Her nickname for me is Short Bus. What a bitch.

Just this past weekend I was at a friend’s property helping her paint a barn as my hubby helped them re-roof that same barn. After a long day of painting we were in her kitchen and she was pointing out some kitchen gadgets she had just picked up. She’s a practising raw food person, although her husband is not. I spotted an interesting contraption on her counter and asked, “Is that a meat grinder?” As a brief silence ensued I quickly realized my blunder and said, “Of course you don’t eat meat…I blame it on the paint fumes.”

I just discovered the Character Map of symbols – from another thread.

I can write in moonspeak and notes now: ۩↨♠♫♪

No wait I just remembered a really awesome duhhhh moment. My daughter was about 2 and said she didn’t feel good. She grabbed my hand like she does when she was going to spit gum in it and preceeded to vomit. Like an idiot I put out my second hand to help catch the vomit. I was horrified at actually touching vomit and yet it was like being a deer stuck in head lights. It took me a few seconds to realize what I was doing and that vomit spills over. Why was I trying to save the floor??
Why??

background info: i took three years of spanish

I was on an ambassadors of music tour. We stopped in Paris for three days. On the way from London to Paris we were given a few basic french lessons. On the second day in Paris, we had some free time to wander, check out the shops. After being laughed at by four shopkeeps in a row, i realized i had reverted to my high school spanish. not french. D’oh.

In social communications, I’m an idiot studying to become a moron. I can’t read nonverbal social cues (Aspergers Syndrome, but I only learned what it was a few years ago). My lady and I had lived together, as friends, for over 2 years. One day she asked me flat out if I was gay. She was totally frustrated by 2½ years of sending me every signal she could think of that she wanted more than friendship. I don’t “speak” body language, subtle verbal cues, or that incomprehensible magic called “eye contact”. I was very interested in romance, but was afraid to make any move that might spoil our friendship by offending her. Duh!! (We married in 1999)

I don’t remember how old I was when I finally became aware that Rome is the capital of Italy, not a country, but I was definitely old enough to know better. I had totally forgotten about this until now… thanks for reminding me, NOT

I lurve @stranger_in_a_strange_land – just saying.

@zenele Thank you sir. Whats that thread that explains how to do those symbols?

@Draconess25 Welcome to the club. :^)

I always try to find shampoo mixed with conditioner because I don’t like to have to rinse twice (how lazy can you get). I finally realized that I can mix them myself right in my hand just before I apply them.

@stranger_in_a_strange_land Well, it was more like this….Ellie: “How could you not know you like us?! You’ve stared at our chests all through high school!” Rachel: “You just noticed you had the hots for us? You useless reptile….”

@Draconess25 ROFL. With Meghan it was ”...and all that time you were a perfect gentleman…damn it!!”.

@stranger_in_a_strange_land XD I swear, they wanted to smack me!

@Draconess25 Smack?! Before, during or after the orgy? ;^P

Okay so i have had a cell phone for about 2 years.. About 6 months ago my friend was talking to me (over cell phone) and i kept hearing this really annoying clicking noise… Finally I was like “Wat is that clicking?!?” Then she said she was texting. I felt soo dumb! I had no idea you could text while talking on your cell phone lol.

@stranger_in_a_strange_land I am pm-ing you details.

So many, which one to chose!

We always used to holiday in a particular spot by the sea in England, complete with picturesque light house. My dad always told me that it was the light house where they filmed Fraggle Rock. For years, I believed him that Fraggle Rock was a real place! Some time in my late teens it came up in discussion, and I was so convinced this was true that he had to show me the true name of the area on a map. Doh!

I also mistook the lyrics ”Wombles of Wimbledon Common are we” to mean, “Wombles of Wimbledon, common are we”. I thought they were just common and not afraid to admit it.

@jeanmay I thought Jimmy Hendrix was singing “excuse me while I kiss this guy”, Huey Lewis wanted a “new truck” and CCR was telling me “there’s a bathroom on the right”, duh!

@stranger_in_a_strange_land He he!