Inappropriate alternatives for the use/misuse of kitchen utensils?

Well there’s the classic sharp knife screwdriver.

Back scratchers.

Slotted spoon – cat litter scooper

Some one once told me they used a desert spoon to push a prolapsed rectum back.

My butter knife was used just this morning to get my dog’s tag off of her little ring thing on her collar.

My mom used a wooden spoon or a flyswatter to express displeasure with her children. ouch

The wooden BBQ skewers I buy each summer end up getting a lot of use. I wrap one end in paper towels to clean the fish tank, tape two of them together to make long enough sticks for roasting marshmallows, use them to test cakes for doneness when I can’t find the toothpicks, and they are awesome for digging squishy substances, like Play-doh, out of small nooks and crannies.

Tongs are great for retrieving small toys that end up under the fridge. When my garden spade is missing, a big serving spoon works almost as well.

Last, but not least, an old pasta pot makes a good “puke pot” when you have a sick kid who might not make it to the bathroom in time.

@MissAusten Ah, the wooden spoon.

I’ve used a pancake turner to kill a spider.

Spatula/putty knife. Muffin tins/tempera paint mixing tray. Silicon cake pan liners/potholders. Big chef’s knives/make your point when arguing.

@MissAusten @jfos Our wooden spoon has holes in it. :l

Spatulas are the best “Mind-changer” I can think of…can-openers…not so much ;)

Large fork to prod my nuts.

Just a small prick though.

I like to use a nice, sharp, kitchen knife to simultaneously open a DVD/CD wrapper whilst performing an unanesthetized and impromptu phalangectomy. Good times!

@ucme sorry to hear it.

@Trillian Now hey, i’ve told you before you saucy mare.If I have to chastise you just one more time I shall have to put you over my knee.Now since neither of us would find that a particularly attractive proposition, i’d assume that was the end of the matter.Yours truly, “Big Boy” ;¬}

We used a large plastic pitcher for our pregnant daughter-in-law to puke in, and now it sits in the bathroom with the toilet cleaning brushes in it.

i have been known to throw knives at paintings before today and forget that they were there until my parents noticed the next day

@MissAusten My mom did that too. Once she smoked me upside the head with a wooden stirring spoon and it broke. I was all like, lol pwnd.

I learned the “Aunt Jemima Treatment” from the instructional video Stripes.