How did you come to terms with your parent/parents' alcoholism?

Became a “gym rat!” 24/7/365!

@BoBo1946 Really?? Did that help you?

I never came to terms with my father’s alcoholism and his rages. Eventually, he quit drinking as much because he had metastatic cancer and so my hatred for his alcoholism subsided. He is dead now and that’s that.

@Simone_De_Beauvoir Wow, that’s intense. Do you think it made you bitter?

@Simone_De_Beauvoir Bitter towards him, certainly.

@kikibirdjones it kept my mind off the mess…and got a four year scholarship and a college education out of it!

Thanks guys. Keep it going if you have more thoughts.

My Mother had a real hard life, I just understood & made sure I was never too far away…. :-/

@kikibirdjones Here’s a thought – my father’s alcoholism and the fact that I lost my brother to drunk driving (by another person, not him…though he was drunk too) made me never want to drink myself and I haven’t now for years…furthermore, I am extremely lucky that my partner doesn’t drink because I’d hate if he needed that in his life. I recognize that this is a trigger issue for me but I have left people because they disregarded my sensitivities on the subject and proceeded to get batshit wasted anyway.

@Simone_De_Beauvoir I understand that.

Also, I don’t blame or have any animosity toward my Dad! For all practical purposes, my Dad died on the Beach of Normandy D-Day! Drinking was an escape from all the misery Dad saw that day. Sad deal…one day, want to put my arms around Dad and tell him it is okay…I love you! Did not do that when he was alive because I feared him so much. There was a lot of violence in my family in the early years. It was a very difficult childhood, but now, I understand why Dad was that way. Did not then.

My dad is a bit of an alcoholic. It doesn’t really bother me because I don’t really have a relationship with him…never have. He is caught up in himself to the degree that it surprises me when he remembers he has six kids.

I really needed him through my teenage years but he was never there. Still isn’t.

With my mom, I acted with her like I would with a strict teacher, hoping that if I didn’t know the answer that she wanted to hear, it would still be the right one. When she was drunk, my mom was delusional, and she had this habit of playing mind games with me and making me feel guilty about everything. Or she was just nuts. One Christmas night she came to my bed and started crying and pleading that when I grow older, to not kill her. She also got violent often, so my trick was to be unnoticed as much as I could, but it didn’t often work, and at that point I went with the flow as much as I could. Trying to say or do the right things.
But I stood little chance, she made my dad cry so many times with her bullshit. When she was sober she was kind and loving, mostly, but her behaviour also got alarming and hazardous to me at times, even if she didn’t drink. I don’t think she ever needed booze to be all messed up haha.
She eventually got together with this dude who I nicknamed Rambo, and he was twice as psycho as her. But even then, he had his limits, and he often used to send me to my dad’s place by calling the cops or paying for a cab when she got too mental. I could sit here and tell a buncha stories but that’s not the point, so how I dealt with it is, besides what I already said, I didn’t really, until I got taken from her custodial responsibility to go live with my dad.
I think that because of how that worked out, an important part of my childhood used to learn to deal with major problems was grinded to the ground, which might very well have caused my own alcoholism.

My dad was an alcoholic too, and he couldn’t keep a job, I wasn’t looked after very well. One drunken night he came to piss on my bed when I was in it haha. In the morning I told him about it, and he didn’t even remember. He totally loved me though, despite what this sounds like, I know he tried. He tried to take care of me, and a lot of it I think was hard for him. He was strong in many ways, just not in looking out for people.

My dad was born in the wrong age, he was meant to be a pirate.

I was taken from him too to go live in group homes, but he kept visiting me, spending weekends with me and bringing presents for me and shit.
As an adult, I think what I realize is how bad he felt about it, but he did manage to quit drinking one day, ecxept some of his habits, like not wanting to work, didn’t go away.
But I dealt with that knowing that maybe my dad was a lot of bad things, but he wasn’t a liar and I know he loved me for real. I can’t quite explain it, but I always felt it. He taught me a lot of things too, and showed to me in a lot of ways how the world works, or, at least, I think. Anyways, I knew he had a problem then, but I basically dealt with it by realizing that shit happens.
He did a way better job of anything than my mom did, anyways.

And no I’m not trying to be all emo and get attention, although I realize that’s what it totally sounds like. But for what it’s all worth to me, I don’t give a shit if someone believes it or not.