Do you think you could be friends with someone if you admire absolutely nothing about them?

When someone is friends with me, I automatically admire them for being able/willing to put up with my shit. So… I guess not!

Well, no – there would have to be something…..

No.

The term “friend” is self-defining, so I would say yes, if only because I’ve had relationships with people I despise (and for whom the feeling is mutual) which occupy some weird territory of comfortable loathing the same way we feel compelled to stick a tongue repeatedly into an angrily painful cavity.

The friends I made have slipped and strayed.
And who’s the one that cares
A trifling lot and best forgot -
And that’s my tale, and theirs.
Then if my friendships break and bend
There’s little need to cry
The while I know that every foe
Is faithful till I die.

- Dorothy Parker

I don’t think I could either. There would have to be something extremely interesting about them.

No.

I am big on respect.

I have zero tolerance for overtly abusive, manipulative, chronically negative or otherwise character flawed individuals.

While I may have empathy for their issues I have no interest in subjecting myself to their instabilities.

I must like and admire those I choose to keep company with.

I don’t think I could. I would have to actually like a person that I want to be friends with. I might become facebook friends with them but other than that no.

I don’t need to have the same interests or views as any of my friends, just a common approach to life.
My friends aren’t alcoholics, drug addicts, screamers or fighters. They needn’t be Republicans, Democrats, educated, white collar, blue collar, married, single, gay, straight, white or black. They just need to be calm, collected, and patient enough to listen to both sides.

I don’t think so.

I don’t think so either.

It’s hard for me to imagine someone about whom there is nothing at all to admire. Everyone has knowledge, experience, tenacity, skill, heart, humor, loyalty, something. Great villains are likely to have many admirable qualities despite being twisted. Hapless duds may be lovable and charming even if they’re wasting their lives. Someone with no personality to speak of may be a genius with mechanical things. Ordinary street thugs may be kind to their mothers.

I can see many admirable qualities in people I would never choose to be friends with. There are close to 7 billion people out there with some sort of admirable quality. Only a few will ever be my friends.

Never. I also have trouble with befriending people who can never seem to do the right thing or make the right decisions in life.

Yes, as I mentioned, character is everything to me. Differences in common interest, personality style, etc. not a big thing. Appriciation for differences and what they can bring to the community table is a good thing, lack of character is impossible to overlook.

@Jeruba – i agree, and it’s a personal choice about what we each find admirable enough in a person also, to want to be friends with them.

@Coloma – i was going to ask in the “details” section what minimum qualities do you need in a friend to consider them a friend. It’s interesting to see what everybody needs from a friend. :)

@NaturallyMe

Nice, honest, cheerful, for the most part ( sans a bad day now and then haha ) generous of spirit, and an appriciation for nature and beauty….all positives! :-)

Character is critical. I admire people of integrity who show respect for others and whose behaviour is consistent with the values they espouse.

I could not consider someone a friend who lacks attributes I admire.

No, they’d be an acquaintance only.

You don’t have to admire anyone to be friends with them! I know some people who are in my view less than admirable except for their insane sense of humor!! Life is too short to not laugh your ass off every once and a while!

My definition of friend is a lot more strict than most people.

@Cruiser – well…..doesn’t that mean that you admire their sense of humour then? :)

You got me!! :))