In your relationships do you think more PC than you end up acting?
If this is familiar for you, do you feel like a “sellout” or do you feel like you maximize your strengths and leave your partner to maximize theirs?
Exp: I’m really good at running a household, I don’t expect my partner to do things I can do better. In the same vein I do expect he carry the greater financial responsibilities like paying when we go to dinner and other extracurriculars because he makes more money.
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2 Answers
I don’t think what you describe is PC or selling out – the point is to have each partner do what they’re good at without expecting them to do it according to their gender – if your partnership seems to fall into gendered norms, that doesn’t mean much because you are just one household – it is only when every household is expected to be the same or is deemed as better than another because it fits traditional gender norms, that there is a problem. In my household, he is the stay at home parent that cooks and and has more patience…I work and hate anything to do with ‘making house’ – we work as a team, we support each other and raise our kids to understand differences in people, partnerships and relationships…we laugh at anyone making comments about our marriage because we’re actually happy and they aren’t, in theirs because of illusory expectations that never bore fruit. Be happy, it’s all good, as long as it works for you, then it’s perfect.
I don’t really get your question as going with your narrative. I think in a marriage both people just get things done. One person can’t do everything, but it is never and is not necessary for it to be exactly a 50/50 deal. You become and operate as a single entity. Don’t try to over-analyze it. Each couple is different.
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