"Should I see a psychologist about these recurring dreams?"?

No. cos, who are you gonna see when you really have problems?

Your dream probably means that in some out of whack way you do love him, You should patch up the holes you made.

So you fell in love with him because of a dream you had about him being in your future? You didn’t fall in love with him because of who he is or how he treats you? It sounds like you were hoping to have a shot with him but it was too late and now your regret it. You could try talking to him and telling him how you feel (if you can get in touch with him), but that may not just make things worse. In time, you will get passed this. Give yourself some time to get over him and move on.

He probably represents something you are unsure about. Are you currently having to make some significant life decisions, and are afraid of making mistake?

I know is not a big deal and i am moving on… but i keep having dreams that somehow affects me emotionally so im just wondering… Is it a possible that a dream changes the way you feel about someone? Why would i dream about someone i haven’t seen or think about in so long?
Im not really making significant life decisions… i came back to my country after living in the states for a year and half and i’m about to graduate but besides that… i don’t know

Many psychologists believe that everything we see in our dreams is a metaphor for ourselves. If you think seeing a psychologist would help you unravel this metaphor, then by all means, see one. If you can sit quietly for a while and come to some conclusions for yourself, then try that.

And welcome to Fluther.

It could be anything. Of the few dreams I recall, they can typically be explained away by something that happened during the day that triggered it; sometimes it can’t. Our minds store a lot of information, and who knows what memories it picks to pull from. I’ve had some weird dreams about an old beau from long ago, but I just take it with a grain of salt.

Unless it is impacting your way of life, then I think your decision to move on is the best way to go.

You could simply be dreaming about him because he is unfinished business.

Why not contact him and tell him your feelings? You have noting to lose and possibly something to gain.

I am a psychologist and @hawaii_jake overstated what he thinks most psychologist believe.
@Pied_Pfeffer was correct that unless these dreams are disrupting your life and ability to function on a day to day basis, you probably don’t require the services of a clinical psychologist.

Much of dream content is the result of random neuron activity and may only ‘mean’ something in you connect it to incomplete or unresolved in your life.

If you decide that contacting this man will help you resolve the current state and future potential of that relationship then contact him, otherwise just let it all go and get on with your life.

I wish you my best,
Dr. Lawrence

Forget him… forget the psychologist! Come sit on my couch…

I think that this guy has become the personification for love and/or adventure. He represents that feeling where you say, “fuck it,” and then dash into something, based on intuition. You want to love. You want to live. You want something that grabs your soul and forces you down a path.

You say you are graduating, and I’m wondering if you know what you are going to do next? If my interpretation of your dream is correct, then you aren’t at all sure, or you aren’t happy with what you plan to do, or the dream is showing you that underneath it all, you’d rather be doing something other than what you plan to do.

What I would suggest (looking into my bogus crystal ball) is that you go on a wanderjahr. Don’t make plans. Just go from place to place and see what tickles your fancy. Follow your impulses. Get into trouble. Get out of trouble. Don’t do this stupidly—have a safety net in place, but do go for it.

The boy? It’s not about the boy. It’s about the feeling of the boy and about your feeling about the boy. That’s what you want—the feeling, not the boy. I suspect that if I am right, and you go for that feeling, the dreams will stop. If the dreams don’t stop, and they begin to bother you, then you might consider psychological counseling, but I really doubt if it is necessary. But go, if it will give you peace.

Anyway, if my interpretation feels right, let me know. If it seems like bs, just quietly ignore it, ok? I mean, I have feelings, too! ;-)

Naw. Just kidding. Give me feedback either way.

As @Dr_Lawrence said, you don’t need a psychologist unless it is disrupting your daily life. Obviously it is an issue for you, but it doesn’t really sound severe enough for professional help. I think you just need to focus on your future more and move on. You must’ve had a good reason to resist the guy for so long, and it doesn’t sound like you had a good reason to suddenly fall for him, so it sounds like you just suddenly craved a relationship, and you knew he was interested. Try to find someone else, and make sure you like them for their qualities as a person.

Save your money

Hm…You probably love him in some really freaky way apparently. Kinda like what @daytonamisticrip said. You must love him in some whacked up way. But do you really love him or is just something like puppy love?

I’m more confused now! but it wasn’t about the pshychologist… my question was wrong it was about dreaming about someone over and over and again… someone that belongs to my past someone i haven’t been in touch or think about now but that i used to think a lot…but i guess i do have unsolved issues but i just have to let it go…

@barbie087 First, welcome to Fluther. I agree with those who said that, unless this dream starts to get in the way of your day-to-day activity, it’s not something that needs professional help. You aren’t sick, so there is no need to see a doctor for a cure. You’re just left mulling over what might have been if only… Life is like that. The thing is, when you come to a fork in the road of life and chose this path or that, you never know where your life would have taken you had you followed the other path. Maybe it would have worked out beautifully. But it is equally possible that your initial disinterest was due to your picking up subtle clues about this guy, and that by letting his attention die on the vine you saved yourself years of pain and suffering.

The bottom line is even if you see the smartest psychologist ever to have lived, s/he won’t know which way that other path would have led either. You just have to move on. And having these dreams for a time is probably just your mind dealing with that reality, sorting it all out.

Good luck moving on.

Barbie…I think the reason you are dreaming about him is that the whole issue is unresolved. You say that he tried to woo you for 3 or 4 months…and you weren’t interested. Then, you had this dream where you were together and he was with your family and then you had these feelings come up for you….and you fell in love. By then, it was too late. (Or so you said.) When you dream about someone over and over like that, there has to be a connection. You are the only one that knows exactly what that might be. I think that you want to be able to talk to him again, and to have the whole situation resolved for good——one way or the other.

The reason I say this (and of course, you make up your own mind, okay?) is because there are a few people out of my past that I have dreams about…and when I do, it is because they are attempting to contact me or there is a reason that we need to perhaps connect. I usually will write to them and if they don’t respond, that’s okay….at least, I tried to contact them. Sometimes dreams come as “heaven’s email”....to let you know that something needs to be addressed.

I always believe in being direct and straightforward. Just call him or write to him and tell him how you feel…straight and to the point:

” Dear Ken, I am writing to tell you that I regret not responding to you when you wanted me to be with you. I was busy with other things and other people and did not really understand or appreciate exactly what your significance was to me. I may still not know. What I do know, is that I keep having recurring dreams about you and I think it would be crazy not to at least chat on Skype or email each other to talk about these dreams. We should resolve the things that we have not been able to say to each other. I know that you are not taking me seriously, but I am being serious about this. I deeply regret not getting to know you better when you wanted me to do so. I would really enjoy talking to you and being able to sort this all out. I look forward to hearing from you soon. I realized when I got home how much you meant to me. I apologize if I hurt your feelings when we first met. I hope we can talk about all this. I miss you. Love, Barbie”

You do not want to go on for the rest of your life wondering…“What if….I had told him my true feelings…?” Tell him, what have you got to lose? If he isn’t interested, you are a beautiful girl with all your life ahead of you…and dozens of men would be happy to be with you. But if you still are wondering…..just open the lines of communication to find out.

(P.S. I have to second @ETpro…Make sure that you were not avoiding him because there was a deeper reason….something that didn’t seem right about him. Did you know any of his friends? Was he a nice guy? Did you know anything about him? Ask yourself these questions…and if it all sounds okay…then you should consider contacting him). But in all, whatever you do….go with your heart.

Welcome to Fluther! :)

I use to have a recurring dream where I was the longterm boyfriend of a girl that I don’t often see in real life. After I while, I was in a similar situation where I thought a stronger relationship could exist in reality. It became more awkward since I became better friends with her and saw her more often. I would always think of the dreams when I saw her. The more I hung out with her though, the more differences I saw between the real girl and the dream girl. After a while the dreams started to be less frequent. I am still good friends with her.

If that does not work, here is a method that I can suggest:

You must go to his house and find a device that looks like a suitcase with clear tubes coming out of it. Hide somewhere and wait until he is asleep. Plug one of the tubes into your arm and the other tube into his arm. You will then fall asleep and enter his dream. When you are in the dream you must go to his house and find a device that looks like a suitcase with clear tubes coming out of it. Hide somewhere and wait until he is asleep. Plug one of the tubes into your arm and the other tube into his arm. You will then fall asleep and enter the second dream layer. Once you there, listen for tropical dance music and you will find an island themed bar. Look for the sign that says “LIMBO.” Look down and you will see that you now holding a banana daiquiri and wearing a hawaiian shirt and grass dress. You will then be transported into an awesome tropical party where you will spend about 80 years with that guy. You will wake up and you will both be happy with the 80 years you partied together.