How have you overcome really old psychological injuries?

I became the bully, I got very aggressive with people who thought they could push me around :-/

I think it helps to accept people for what they are,even if they are are not very kind.
Their comments and opinion do not make you who you are.
“How you treat others is a direct reflection of how you feel about yourself.”-Amber Deckers

I have zero emotional, psychological baggage.

Did my ‘work’ years ago.

Bottom line, NOTHING is personel, nothing, not ever!

Once you realize that anyone that has behaved harmfully towards you is a victim of their own conditioning and level of consciousness, well, takes the ‘personel’ right out of it.

You may choose to avoid those that are not healthy for you, but, you no longer attach a personalized ‘story’ to any behaviors.

I dealt with bullying by becoming extremely violent toward bullies. One of the few useful things my parents were able to do about my autism was getting me martial arts instruction. Being a military brat, I changed schools frequently and had to frequently go through the same drill: identify the bully, bait him into attacking me, physically destroy him in front of witnesses, settle into quiet non-social nerd-dom. A social pariah is better feared than scorned.

I was incessantly bullied through the whole of my schooling and at the age of 43, no I don’t think I have overcome it, and thinking about it still upsets me. Short of having the memories totally erased I don’t think I ever will.

My ex is a bully and violent. With time, I came to forgive, mostly forget and he isn’t interested in speaking anymore since I humor him and don’t care about arguing or accusing. It just doesn’t matter now.

When I went to a middle school that was mostly white, I got some crap from kids about my color. Although it was very naive and simply ignorant (not malicious), I started to wonder if I would ever be accepted by my peers? I felt that no one liked me simply because of my skin color. It didn’t last long, though, because during high school when everyone was older I had a lot of friends and attention from women.

You never do. You just find a place for it.

I feel like my brain automatically dropped a lot of baggage as I’ve matured out of adolescence.

No. Never got over it.
Happened too early to fix.
Life-long work-arounds, compensations,
and under-achievement issues.

Some has mellowed with passage of time.
Some has not.

@stranger_in_a_strange_land impressive way to handle your situation.

Mental health is a matter of placing your life in the proper perspective. Basically, go for the win.

I tried to repress them. Basically, I told myself that I didn’t care, or that I should ”(wo)man up” and not let it bother me. Never do that, it just makes the injuries harder to deal when they re-surface.

I have adapted sufficiently to function effectively despite some long-term effects of painful life experiences. I still have to revisit these issues once in a while.

@anartist It came out of necessity. Without social skills, I could never be accepted. Since I had to be a loner, better a pariah than a victim.

@hawaii_jake I’m sorry that happened to you. I had a similar experience and spent many years in therapy but it helped.

Whether you are gay, hetero, asexual or bii-sexual, it makes no difference, you are still a human being and you should not let judgements of others determine your state of mental health. Get over it. Forget the drama. You are just too sensitive to what others say. It’s not worth the brain cells thinking about it. Others who bully people have more emotional baggage than the people they torment, they just push their problems away by giving problems to thers but it doesn’t really work and in the long term, they live with regrets.

I haven’t. I just wing it.

Most of the pain and trauma I went through came at the hands of relatives and especially my parents. It manifested itself as low self-esteem, anxiety disorder, post traumatic stress disorder and parentified child syndrome. I had no trust and I stayed away from people and relationships. I have done psychotherapy, meditated and read books about people in similar situations and I have finally gotten to a place where I love myself and even though those scars are still there, they are healed scars and I don’t allow them to effect my present life. I have acknowledged those painful memories and put them in a folder in the back of my brain. I let those people rob me of my childhood, they will not rob me of my present happiness. If your having trouble with putting those traumatic events in perspective I advise you to do what I did and start looking for a great therapist. It really does help.