What is a nice way to let someone down romantically?

I don’t think there is anything wrong with the way you are thinking of saying it. It is very clear.

To be honest, you sound like you’ve already got it covered… you’re so right about being in different places in life – it is where you meet in the middle that determines how compatible you may be. She may not understand it now – that’s all part of where she currently is – but as she experiences more in life she will come to see where you are coming from.

I personally like the direct approach and see nothing wrong with telling someone that you aren’t interested.Here’s a tune to honor the occasion

:)

I think you’re way of approaching it is perfect. I think trying to soften something like that too much can be patronising.

It was one date. She can’t be all that enamored with you yet. If she is that’s its own special set of problems.

Just do it.

It was only one date. You don’t know but what she came to the same conclusion. But anyway, “I really had fun (or, enjoyed being) with you. I sense we could be compatible as friends. Not romantically, but as friends. I’m going to. . .( park with dog, etc.) would you like to hang out?” A suggestion.

Thanks for the feedback, guys. I struggle sometimes putting things into the right words when it comes to social conflicts or things like this. The past couple of women I dated long-term gave me a lot of shit for this and now I feel really insecure about it.

I am not full of myself, nor do I have many people who are into me, so I don’t want you thinking I’m imagining things. This girl doesn’t play her cards close to the chest and it’s obvious she’s into me and it’s obvious she’s still into me after the date. As I said, I’m flattered, but I get all freaked out when it comes to possibly hurting someone’s feelings or disappointing them.

Just to weigh in too – it sounded fine to me.

There is no such thing. When people have two different views of their relationship, one is bound to be hurt. There is no way to avoid that.

Actually, I like your words better too. Go with yours.

Your words are really perfect in this instance. Be mindful of your tone of voice because sometimes it’s not what we say but how we say it that hurts people’s feelings. Sound friendly and sincere when you deliver the message, and you’ll be just fine. :)

Sounds good to me. And yes, tone is everything.

I think what you are saying is perfect. It isn’t mean at all and gets right to the point in the nicest way possible.

Sounds like you handled it just fine. You don’t want to be too harsh but you don’t want to sugar coat things too, I don’t think, because don’t want to risk leading the other person to believe you might have feelings or intentions in the future that you simply don’t have. It’s good to be clear.

Whatever you decide to say, just say it face to face.

Just tell her, “it’s not me, it’s you.”

Your expression is very good. It’s short and sweet and considerate of her feelings

@johnny Yes, that will most certainly make sure that it’s the last you ever see of them. :-) Don’t sugar coat it; it only leads them on.

The way you say it is perfect. It’s gotta be direct when it’s something like this I believe personally

Simply look at the reactions you have from your posting. We can’t all be wrong. -:)

Your words are heartfelt, sincere and reflect exactly how you feel. What could be more succinct?

Don’t rehearse in front of a mirror…perhaps meet for coffee and say it from the heart. You AND she will be fine.

I am impressed by the way you explained your question. It says a lot about you, @MissAnthrope.

My best.

Just tell her straight out that its not working for you.