Is it wrong for a guy to hit a girl if the girl hit him first?

Yes.

No.

To me, this is not a black and white issue. How big is the guy’s relative size to the girl? How much stronger is he, in general? Did the girl smack him, punch him, go completely crazy?

I’m not for violence in general, but if a female is going completely nuts on a guy, it’s my opinion that he has every right to do whatever it takes to get her away from him.

Hmmm…is it wrong for a person to defend themself?
No.

I don’t hit people period and would prefer others not not perpetuate violence, too. Is it wrong for a guy to hit a girl who threw the first punch simply because she is a girl? No.

No.

“An eye for an eye and the whole world will go blind” <—Gandhi was such a wuss.

Yes…BUT only because “Hitting is wrong!” in the most simplistic and child-like moral terms.

Objectively, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with a man hitting a woman in any case, as long as the woman can physically hold her own against the man. IF you’re obviously the physical superior, man or woman, child or adult, hitting someone is as obviously wrong. So if the woman who hit the man couldn’t take a return blow, I would say walk away.

In fact, I would treat it like any domestic abuse situation (assuming that type of relationship), and get out as soon as possible, and file charges if necessary. I know practically there are problems with “male pride” in doing this, but I’m sorry – man up and deal with the problems. Abuse should not be tolerated in any situation.

I wouldn’t have a problem hitting a woman if it facilitated my escape. But I wouldn’t beat the shit out of them. Just a punch to the face that stuns them long enough that I could get away.

I wouldn’t do it unless she had a weapon or was behaving in a manner that was so aggressive I had no other choice.

I almost punched out a girlfriend after she smacked me in the mouth hard enough to draw blood. It all happened so fast – one second we’re arguing and the next I have a bloody face – my automatic instinct was to raise my fist in defense/offense…but when I realized what was happening and how close things got to turning VERY ugly I burst into tears and walked away (much to her confusion).

I make it a point to avoid women who might hit me.

A guy should only hit a girl if necessary to defend himself. To not hit her simply because of her gender is silly to me…. What if she’s seriously attacking a man? I think he’d have every right to hit back.
For example what if you were attacked by the Bride from Kill Bill?? You’re not gonna sit and take that shit!
Then again, you’d also probably lose/die.

I agree with @DrasticDreamer , there are a lot of variables here. I think everyone has a right to defend themselves, but it has to be within reason. My husband and I hit each other all the time (that sounds awful.. haha.) But it’s very playful, they are like little love slaps. Not violent or aggressive. Now if I were to haul off and really slap him (not that I would do that!), and he punched me in retaliation, there would be a problem. However, if I came at him with a frying pan and started wailing on him.. I would certainly expect the guy to defend himself. Too many variables to make it such a black and white issue.

If he can stop her by doing something like holding her wrists to stop her from hitting him again, he should do that instead. Also, get away from her as soon as possible. But if she is just a freaking banshee and won’t stop and there is no other choice, by all means, shove her down or smack her to stun her into stopping so he can make his getaway.

I think it’s wrong, yes.

And by the way, my answer is Yes.

@chyna – I don’t know – if he has to do something physical (i.e., can’t just walk away) because she’s physically confronting him, I don’t think there’s really a difference between holding her down and hitting her. If he can’t get away, because she’s “bringing it”, then I think hitting her is totally acceptable.

If she wants to fight like a man, she can get hit like a man.

One hit/slap doesn’t really count, she may just be mad, but if a woman is wanting to full on fight, well I’m not just gonna stand there.

@iamthemob I guess I was thinking if she slapped him and he grabbed her wrists and kind of threw her to the side of the room to be able to get out the door, he should try that first. But yes, if she is bringing it on, smack her.

@chyna I get that – I just think that if there’s going to need to be any sort of physical violence – holding, pushing, etc. – what type doesn’t really matter.

DEGREE, of course, should always be a concern.

There’s nothing innately wrong in anyone hitting another in self-defence, chivalry is just a convention afterall. However it should be considered that females typically weigh less, have less muscle mass and feel pain more intensely than males, so in many regards it’s the same as asking if it’s reasonable to hit someone in their 60s as hard as someone in their 30s.
If potentially fatal weapons are involved that’s an entirely different story and one should do what’s necessary (within reason) to ensure their survival in that situation.
Basically my answer is that it’s not wrong for a man to hit a woman if she hits him first with the intention of seriously fighting but the man should have the sense to realise that he shouldn’t handle her with the force that an aggressive 200lb streetfighter would require, unless she has considerable training and/or experience in fighting in which case some additional force may be required.

Well if she hits him, and he’s not hurt but just wants to “get even”. Then yes, I think it’s wrong, but if the girl is seriously beating the sh*t out of a guy, take her out! And not on a date either!

uh i wouldnt do it. let her go to jail—not me.

Yes. Only a pussy wimp punk would hit a woman. Even were she to hit him first.

It doesn’t matter who hit who for what reason, violence sucks and it’s wrong, unless someone is trying to kill or severely wound you.

Kind of, while it may be wrong to hit them, being female is not a golden ticket to behave however you like. personally I would not.

Yes, assault is wrong. Gender or” who hit who first?”, it doesn’t matter. It’s wrong.

@Ben_Dover I would argue, however, that “only a pussy wimp punk” would let themselves get beat up by a woman (using your colorful framing of it ;-)).

@poisonedantidote being female is not a golden ticket to behave however you like.

It’s interesting how many women believe that it does.

@iamthemob Too True

“Only a pussy wimp punk” would let themselves get beat up by a woman!

for me, yes it is wrong.

My parents told me that if I am big enough to hit somebody, then I should be prepared for the consequences. So I don’t have a problem with it all.
I’m just not stupid enough to hit a guy or girl, especially if they are mentally unstable.

Edit: If it were unprovoked, then I have an issue

Yes but only because hitting is not an answer. It’s wrong for that woman to hit a man, any woman (unless all of this is in self defense).

Besides, shouldn’t he be trying to stop making her want to hit him and work on getting her to engage in physical contact of a more pleasurable nature?

Nope. Gender has absolutely nothing to do with who can and can’t hit someone. Nothing.

Is it in true self-defence? Then, no, because a person has to protect themselves.

No. I have been struck by a woman and didn’t hit her back. I restrained her hands so she couldn’t hit me again and left the scene. I can see where some people would say it’s ok because it’s self defense. I just can’t bring myself to hit a woman.

Ooh i’d scratch her bloody eyes out!

Absolutely, lack of self control is unattractive.

No. For the most part I can overpower any woman very easily. I would just restrain them or call the cops if I had to (let her get in trouble instead of me). Nothing is gained by hitting a woman plus it would make me feel like shit about myself if I did. I am usually very hesitant even when it comes to another guy (especially if they are smaller than me). I’ve been tested a few times on this one personally. I’m just not a combative or aggressive guy. I can fight real good when I have too but fighting is super rare for me.

I feel like it’s actually anti-feminist to say that it’s not okay to hit a woman. I understand WHY and I wouldn’t criticize anyone personally for feeling that they shouldn’t. However, if that feeling is not spread to all forms of violence, we’re in many ways submitting to the stereotype that women are weaker than us and deserve our protection.

If I said that to a lot of women I know…well, dude – they’d totally hit me.

@iamthemob So hit them back!

@bob_ – dude, I’m gonna…I fully support the feminist movement

@iamthemob
With due respect, I believe women are generally physically weaker than men. From what i’ve observed and read of the matter females naturally have less muscle mass, weight and feel pain more intensely than men (as I said above). Make no mistake, I know of women who I would never want to mess with in a fight; they’re confident, trained and prepared to defend themselves but at the end of the day the inherent brute strength that males have can easily overwhelm most. If females were not generally physically weaker how is it that most males you know can physically overcome most females? Why is it that in the olympics the sexes are separated?
A common argument is that females have greater stamina as proven by childbirth but it’s been shown that during childbirth a significant amount of neurochemicals are released to assist in making the experience more easily endurable meaning that it’s not the person but the nervous system’s reaction to the situation that causes said stamina.
I mean no offense and am myself an advocate of feminism but when inherent differences are so evident it’s difficult to comprehend how one can disregard them.

@Nially_Bob

With due respect, I already agreed with that statement above. :-)

The assumption that they are necessarily weaker, however, is problematic. And regardless of whether they are physically weaker, that doesn’t mean they’re a worse fighter. That’s the problem as I see it.

As stated above, I think that fighting anyone obviously weaker than you is weak in itself, and should be avoided. If it can’t, it should be handled carefully. But it’s a distinctly sexist thing to say that women shouldn’t be hit. No one should be hit. But sometimes, you need to to extract yourself from a situation.

I agree with your general assessment, but disagree when it comes to general rules that should come from that assessment.

@iamthemob
Fair point, the assumption is problematic but it is a natural reaction for humans (or any intelligent creature for that matter) to assume something more intensely the more frequently it occurs. Accordingly if I notice that most women I encounter seem weaker than myself then I will begin to assume that this is the norm. It’s not a particularly rational train of thought admittedly but it certainly exists.
With this said I do concur with most of what you state, especially your belief on fighting someone weaker than yourself. Also, as you mentioned, I agree that the chivalrous “no hitting” policy is poorly founded but as I said previously to some extent it should be implemented in so much as men should consider that women are more likely to be seriously harmed by them.

@Nially_Bob I think you’re right that such “chivalry” (I love that word) has practical short term results. My problem is always that it creates the assumption that, not only are they generally weaker, but also from that they need to be protected.

I think that the chivalry would be best detached from any discussions of sex. We all can tell that generally someone smaller and thinner than us is probably weaker.

And when it comes down to it, women have the good old fashioned kick to the balls method that we can’t really work out an equivalent for on them. If the general chivalry fails, they’ve got that to fall back on.

@iamthemob
True true, but it should be noted that there have been extremely unfortunate stories of sexual assault wherein the woman has attempted to go for the crown jewels and it’s only caused the attacker to become aggrivated and perhaps even acquire an adrenaline rush to deal with the situation.
I agree that people should not presume that women need protecting, but I think it becomes more of a habit than a deprivating perception. To offer a personal example, though I know this may not apply to everyone, my best friend is a young lady and although i’m well aware she can take care of herself it’s the habit i’ve developed from realising that she may be (as little a possibility as there actually is) hurt by a group of drunken men at a club that causes me to feel I need to protect her. I think this feeling of “needless protectiveness” towards females derives from a more widespread version of this. As you said however this feeling is best left aside in polite company.
So basically, having reviewed my comment and your previous one, I can see that we mostly agree on the subject. The only element I wish to emphasise is that it would be difficult for those who realise these things to not act on them appropriately.

@Nially_Bob

Yeah, I would never suggest fighting back in some dangerous situations. You’re right about that. But I think that’s slightly beyond the arguments in this post. ;-)

@iamthemob
No argument there. Have a pleasant evening Mob :)