Social Question

msh's avatar

When your doorbell rings, or someone knocks on the door, do you answer or ignore?

Asked by msh (4270points) September 23rd, 2015 from iPhone

I never answer the door. If someone rings the doorbell or knocks- I just keep on doing what I am doing. If someone I know calls me to say they want to stop by, that’s fine. Otherwise, it’s a no-go.
I’m quite sure some think it’s rude of me to not answer when summoned, but, um, tough luck.
Do you answer the door if someone knocks or pushes a button for you to greet them through the screen door????
Please explain why or why not.
Do not eeeven think of doing any ‘knockers’ jokes! I will send every landscaping, window replacing, cookie-selling ding dong to your house, and I mean it! :)

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46 Answers

ZEPHYRA's avatar

Ignore and tip toe around until the stranger goes!

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

It depends what I’m doing. I usually get a warning of an impending knock because my dogs start barking. I can peek to see who it is. If it’s someone I know, I open the door. I would always prefer people give me a call to say they’re coming over though. If I don’t know them, it would depend on the time of the day, what I’m doing and what I’m wearing. I might just ignore them. I might answer.

My postman has taken to bringing parcels to the door and knocking. If it’s in the morning and I haven’t got properly dressed yet, I’d rather he either left things at the gate or put a card in the box. I’ve ignored him on a few occasions. No other postman has ever come to the door! I’m not sure what the heck is going on there.

ucme's avatar

We have staff for that.

SmashTheState's avatar

People on Fluther (and on the Internet in general) are wildly disproportionately likely to have the INTP Myers-Briggs archetype. I, too, am INTP, and I, too, ignore people who knock uninvited at my door. INTPs do not take distractions well, nor are we especially gregarious; it’s why we flock online, where we can control the quality and amount of social interaction.

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

I’m an ENFP. It’s got nothing to do with introversion for me. I just don’t want people arriving uninvited when I’m working or otherwise busy or not ready for guests (or weird postmen).

anniereborn's avatar

9 times out of 10 I don’t answer. I try and peek out to see who it is. No one and I mean no one is welcome without a phone call first. I find that intrusive and rude.

and I am a INFP

Pachy's avatar

Almost always, especially after 7 pm. In eight years at this house, the only time I didnt open the door for someone I wish I had was a neighbor who, I learned the next day, needed a telephone.

Pachy's avatar

I neglected to say why I don’t open my door. It’s because I hate being hustled to buy something, which is usually why someone rings my bell or (as they often do) pounds on my door. The exception to my rule, of course, is Halloween. I love seeing the little kids dressed up and their folks standing nearby proudly looking on.

jca's avatar

Where I live (about 14 years), I can count on one hand the times when someone came to my door unexpectedly, other than someone I know for something specific. I am not overly friendly with my neighbors so they’re not coming over. I have a guy who mows my lawn and so if I’m not home when he mows, he’ll come over in the next day or two to get the check. Usually if there’s a knock, it’s him. Otherwise, the few people that do come over are people who I expect and we’ve planned it. I live far away from most friends and family so people are not just popping over, which is good.

I will answer the door. Maybe twice it was politicians or voter registration people. Twice it was because I called 911 by accident. Maybe once or twice it was the mailman. That is about it in 14 years.

I do get alarmed when I hear a knock, because like I said, nobody is coming here unexpectedly. I’m often either looking not that good (hair messy, makeup on from yesterday), or I’m walking around without clothes.

janbb's avatar

I usually will answer the door unless I see that Jehovah’s Witnesses are on the block. It’s a rare enough occasion that it is not a big deal. Sometimes it is a canvasser and I politely turn them away.

rojo's avatar

Depends on what I am doing at the time it happens or whether or not I am expecting company. While most of the time it is people I don’t want to see or deal with, my neighbors do come over every once in a while and I don’t like to ignore them.

Cruiser's avatar

FWIW, I am an INTJ and that has nothing to do with whether or not I answer the door. I always answer the door because if I don’t the dawg will just continue to bark like the savage beast she is plus it will either be a neighbor, the pizza delivery person or my son’s friend.

longgone's avatar

It’s a struggle. I usually feel obliged to, but do not (at all) enjoy unexpected visits. Mostly, I think that’s because I want to feel like my apartment is safe, devoid of unwanted social interaction. Even if I enjoyed my daily activities, I come home at night with a sigh of relief. There is no-one I want to see at that point, I’m busy re-charging my batteries for the next day.

Most of my friends and family members are kind enough to call in advance.

Mimishu1995's avatar

I don’t answer because no one knocks on my door. The door is impossible to be knocked anyway. Everyone calls out and I always answer. I call in front of others’ houses too. I guess we don’t have the habit of knocking.

rojo's avatar

Sob! I don’t know what type of Myers-Briggs archetype I am!! (where does part time asshole but overall ok guy fall?)

janbb's avatar

@rojo I don’t know either. You and I will be tossed out of Fluther on our ears.

Mimishu1995's avatar

I don’t know either. I’ll get tossed too.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

If someone finds my door they’re probably in trouble, because you wouldn’t find my door easily, so yes, I would answer it. It may bite me in the ass some day but that’s life.

rojo's avatar

Turns out on the Asshole Rating Self-exam (ARSE), with a 12, I am only a borderline Certified Asshole. Seems I can’t even do that completely right.

filmfann's avatar

If there is a knock at the door, I answer it.
If the phone rings, I don’t check caller ID. I answer it.

You never know if someone is trying to warn you of a problem. “The back hill is on fire!”

canidmajor's avatar

I answer my door, why would I not? I live in a neighborhood. If I don’t want to talk to or deal with the person, I simply, politely turn them away. No big deal.

My main doors are open all summer long anyway, and I have loud dogs.

janbb's avatar

@canidmajor I’m with you.

jca's avatar

@canidmajor and @janbb: I’m with you, three. It would never occur to me not to answer the door.

Cruiser's avatar

@rojo I took your Asshole Rating Self-Exam (ARSE) test and I too

“sound like a borderline certified asshole, perhaps the time has come to start changing your behavior before it gets worse.” o_O

ibstubro's avatar

We don’t use the main door, and there’s even one of those jimmy things on it. If I see it’s someone I know, I’ll put the garage door up and walk out to meet them.

I live in the sticks, but on a busy county highway so unexpected knocking is either an asphalter of JW. Best of luck.

Tropical_Willie's avatar

Answer it, we have people drop by unannounced. The salespeople or random Proselytist gets to say hello to my two black Lab / German Shepard dogs (combined they weigh almost 200 pounds). They usually don’t come back.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I hate those late night knocks. What always goes through my mind is something bad happened.

rojo's avatar

That is another aspect @Adirondackwannabe, is there a certain time after which a person will not answer the door?

For me personally, no, but I live in a suburban environment with little fear of crime in my neighborhood (other than the Latter Day Sainters’ who are technically not committing a crime but perhaps should be classified as such).

jul_ras's avatar

I never answer the door unless I’m expecting someone.

Coloma's avatar

Nobody ever just knocks on my door, not here at the ranch or at my old home on 5 acres. Both have ranch gates, this one is electric so unless you hit the intercom button and call up to the house or know the code you’re SOL. haha
Then, of course, there is “Marwyn” my 17 year old watch goose, nobody gets past him and he shrieks out the ” strangers a’ comin’ ” call. lol
At my old house if I left the gate open he would nail anyone in the driveway, especially the roving bands of Jehovahs Witnesses which has earned him the title of ” witness protection goose.”
I could never just not answer the door, especially if it was someone I knew, only religious solicitors or other unknown people.

cazzie's avatar

I wish I could do that, but I’m the head of my home ownership group, so they will ring my door bell and ask dumb questions within their right when they want. They ask questions about garbage removal or the pot holes in the drive way. Yea me.

Love_my_doggie's avatar

I answer the door. If it’s someone raising money for a charity I don’t support, or somebody trying to “save” me from eternal damnation, I politely decline and shut the door.

If anyone here’s a Jehovah’s Witness, I apologize in advance for offending you. Lately, I’ve noticed a trend; Jehovah Witnesses go door-to-door with a beautiful child in tow, usually about age 5. I guess there’s a hope that people will be more receptive to a cute kid and less likely to turn-away the group. Certainly, other people have different values and beliefs than I do, but I find this rather troubling.

cazzie's avatar

My upstairs neighbours are JW’s and the others upstairs are 7th Day Aventists…... I don’t have a hope in proverbial hell of getting out of this without some very awkward conversations.

JLeslie's avatar

I usually answer the door.

Coloma's avatar

@cazzie Wanna borrow my goose, he comes with testimonials. lol

Dutchess_III's avatar

We don’t have a doorbell. The only people who knock on our front door, the only people who even COME to the front door, are salesmen, Jehova’s witnesses and cops. Yeah, I answer the door.
Everyone who is important to me just walks in the back door.

elbanditoroso's avatar

I largely depends on how dressed (or undressed) I am.

dxs's avatar

It doesn’t happen since I live on the top floor of an apartment. I think I’d go down to answer if someone rang the bell.

I have no clue what 4-letter acronym Myers-Briggs would label me with.

ibstubro's avatar

Yeah, I’m rural and those late night knocks really bring you awake, @Adirondackwannabe. About the only time I will consistently answer my door is late night, @rojo, since I live on a busy 2-lane blacktop.

So, then, ‘Ever not answer the intercom?’ would be your question here, @Coloma.
Have to goose the woman, now and then.

Having a 5yo in tow would make me is it possible?? less likely to let salespeople into my house, @Love_my_doggie, regardless the product. Not to dispute your data, but to question the effectiveness of the strategy.

Getting out of what “without some very awkward conversations?” @cazzie If it’s “head of my home ownership group”, then you have the perfect out – respect for the diversity of the group!

Yeah, all the women on Wisteria Lane answer the door, @JLeslie! ~~

I curse people that do not have a doorbell, @Dutchess_III, when we go to a house.
Forgetting that I don’t have a doorbell, myself. Thanks for reminding me!

Or the distance between you, your clothing, and the door, @elbanditoroso. My computer’s in one corner of my house, my clothes closet (bedroom) the exact opposite.

You don’t live alone, @dxs, do you?

Coloma's avatar

@ibstubro Mostly the intercom is delivery people so have to answer. Not many drop ins in the hills. haha

If personality type is supposed to factor in well..I am an ENTP and as charming and gregarious as I can be, I don’t like unexpected drop ins. We are known as the most introverted of the extroverts. We have 2 buttons, really on and really off. haha

DrasticDreamer's avatar

INFP here (:P) and I will never answer the door if it’s someone I don’t know. Not because I’m scared, I’m just a massive introvert.

rojo's avatar

Innies and Outies! How do you people know this stuff!

dxs's avatar

@ibstubro No. I would if I could afford it.

tinyfaery's avatar

My first intention is to not let them hear me. I peek and then choose if I want to open the door or not. Usually not.

cazzie's avatar

At my old place, the neighborhood brats would ring and run to torment my son and piss me off. They new his father was rarely home, so they would ring the doorbell and run into the bushes next door and laugh. They can’t do it here because of where my door is. They tried it once, but I saw them, walked out my front door and they ran off. I had nightmares for a while that they threw my patio furniture through my front windows. One of the boys, I’m sure, is a sociopath. His stare is pure evil.

msh's avatar

Jeeze! I hate snots like that. I’m sorry for your boy. It is hard to deal with. You be careful going outside too far! Listen to your instincts with the devil-kid. I wish you could call the police to scare the heck out of them. Your dreams are upsetting if you are seeing them that vividly. Be careful, ok…..
Take care~

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